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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Would you rather...?

Posted by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 10:49 AM
  • 5 Replies

Would you rather have SO tell you they're done with the relationship now (right before the Holidays) or wait until after the new year, knowing that something is up but not exactly sure what that entails.

What about the other way around? If you were the one breaking up would you rather do it now and get it over with, or keep avoiding it and hope that the Holidays would be better not doing it?

Birthday

by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 10:49 AM
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Replies (1-5):
little.worthen
by Tessie on Nov. 19, 2012 at 10:50 AM
I would wait, and I'd want to know but I would want to get along for the holidays for the kids sake.
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carakitty
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 11:25 AM

Would having something like this out in the open make things better or worse, do you think?

I wouldn't want us to tell 8yo DD until after Christmas.

Ama2Gunner
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 2:32 PM

I'm a fan of being honest - no matter what the situation is or the holiday that is happening. I don't connect bad situations with holidays and let it affect how I celebrate.

If the breakup is inevitable, then avoiding it doesn't make it go away, nor does it make things easier.

For me - it would be easier to have that convo between the adults now, so we know what is going on and where things are going to go. And if we can handle it, stay in the same home until after the holidays, but sleep in separate spaces. 

The kids (if there are kids involved) know things are not going good. They are not stupid, and can feel the energy in the home. It would be better for all of that to be cleared up, so everyone can just enjoy the holidays and move on with life.

carakitty
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 6:26 PM

Thankfully things are bearable between DH + I. We don't usually have big fights and I don't mind sleeping in the same bed as him. I do feel a bit uncomfortable when he cuddles up to me, though. =( I agree, our DD probably knows stuff isn't good between her dad + I. She asked a while ago (in June) about if we  were going to break up but that was right after her dad and I had a little spat and she also had been reading a book where the main character was dealing with her parents divorce so her questions weren't completely out of the blue.

Krysden
by Platinum Member on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:33 PM

no idea on this one... but wanted to wish you luck

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