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When's the last time you thanked your spouse or heard him day "thank you"?

Posted by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:17 PM
  • 52 Replies

Thanking Your Spouse Is Good for Your Marriage

Posted by Kristen Chase on November 27, 2012

Giving thanks to your spouseMaybe I was just a little grouchy after having to spend Thanksgiving alone, but I admit that I'm one of those people who has been pretty annoyed with the "Thankful" meme that's been going around on Facebook. If you're not familiar, every day people post something that they're thankful for, some of which are lovely and others of which just seem to be a desperate attempt to stick with a meme for 30 days.

And while I understand that it's important to have gratitude and give thanks for even the small things, I wonder if those people have thought about taking the next step and actually saying "thank you" to those who need to hear it most. Like their spouses. And how it can make a huge difference in their marriages. 

I still remember when I had my oldest daughter, now 8, and had the shocking revelation that moms do so much, most of which is completely thankless. There's no recognition for loading the dishwasher day in and day out, for changing yet another poopy diaper, or even getting up in the middle of the night to put a baby back to sleep.

All that is just part of the job.

However, when someone recognizes the challenges of parenthood, even if it's just with a simple "thank you," it's amazing how much more bearable some of the mundane tasks can become.

So much of the early issues my husband and I had in our marriage stemmed from me not feeling appreciated and, as we're learning in therapy, from him feeling the same way. We both wrote each other's jobs off as "easy" or as something we just had to do, and we never really acknowledged each other's efforts.

But lately, we've both been trying to be more thankful. No, not grateful updates on our Facebook walls, but just simple "thank yous" for things that matter. I know it's not easy for him, not because he's ungrateful but because expressing himself is a challenge.

So when he said "thank you" to me the other day for packing our kids' suitcases for a trip he was taking them on, it meant a lot. And the truth is, I've done it many many times before, without any sort of thanks at all. But those words, well, I'm pretty sure they felt better than any sort of gift he could have given me. Now I'm going to do my best to follow suit and say it in return.

When's the last time you've said or heard "thank you"?

by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lapcounter
by Gold Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:17 PM
Last night before bed, he thanked me for all.I do for him and ours girls.
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Mesh2
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:18 PM

We thank each other when we do things for each other :) 

nsparky1964
by Bronze Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:24 PM
This morning and every morning when I wake him up for work and bring him his morning g coffee...also every evening after dinner...we appreciate each other and were always going nice things for each other.
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MsRkg
by Bronze Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:24 PM

I said thank you a few hours ago since he took over getting one of my cars repaired because I've been way to busy with work and other stuff to even get around to it . I just left it on the street and it had been accumulating tickets for the past few days, so he just woke up this morning took care of the tickets, had it towed to the dealer, and had the dealer bring the loaner car to me, without me even asking. He's so awesome, although in my defense I was going to do it when I got home from work today lol.

emarin77
by Bronze Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:26 PM

Yesterday.  He said thank you for me folding his socks.  I said thank you for taking care of me when I was sick.

jmjdj
by Bronze Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:29 PM

He said thank you last night for the dinner I cooked....as he does every time I cook for him.

mamoore83
by Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:44 PM

We do say thank you for specific things that we do for each other, I also say thank you to my son when he goes above and beyond, or even when he does his normal chores.  I want him to know that even though the stuff he does is necessary and he'd have to do it any way it's still appreciated, hopefully he'll remember what it's like and say thank you to his wife when he gets married eventually.

godsgirl26
by Silver Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:45 PM


Quoting Mesh2:

We thank each other when we do things for each other :) 

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ncohetero
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:45 PM
Yesterday
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Aphalicious
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 2:53 PM

I say thank you at least 3x a day. Him.. Maybe 3x a week.

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