Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

ddh has a chick friend...advice???

Posted by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 2:26 AM
  • 60 Replies

a little history on the whole thing....he talked to her before we we're together only on the phone though an met her four times in person... when we got together (I was 16 he was 19) an I found out about her I didn't like it. let's face it when your a teenager every female is a threat to you. any who we got In a argument about it an he said he would never talk to her again... four yrs later all of a sudden she texts him out the blue an they start chatting it up. he doesn't keep it a secret from me that they are texting back an fourth an I wasn't ok with it but I was dealing with it because I don't think he would cheat on me or anything like  that. well he in invites her to stay a weekend withwith us without asking me first. I've oonly met the girl once (before me an dh started dating) an  I thought we were going there for dh an the girl to meet up am have a date.. so it was a lititle awkward because I felt like the third wheel  but they were just friends. me personally I find it awkward an weird for him to be trying to rekindle thAt friendship when he said he would never talk to her again. and also he has no male friends what so ever. when We started getting our lives together all his friends disappeared be cause he wasn't supporting there bad habits any more to say the least an he hasn't made anymore friends since then.I guess I just need other female advice on how to handle this or what to do.... I don't trust any  female except my bestie. all the stories I've read on here make me very weary of females..... let me know how you would handle this and what you would dodo.thanks in advance.

by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 2:26 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
danichaos
by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 2:28 AM
5 moms liked this
Dont trust any female, even your bestie
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Kaybean
by Bronze Member on Jan. 2, 2013 at 2:30 AM
3 moms liked this
First of all, no offense but I can't stand when people abbreviate and for an. It drives me nuts!





As for your post goes, that would not fly with me. It would be one thing if they were childhood friends or went to high school together or something, but only meeting 4 times and talking on the phone, then her texting him out of nowhere 4 years later and then to top it off, him inviting her to stay the weekend and then not even asking? I would flip a lid!
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
expectnanother
by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 2:36 AM

I did flip out when I read the message an I told him she is not coming to stay at my house an I dnt know her. he told me the only reason he said that was because she lives two an a half hrs away an doesn't see the point of driving all that way an then back. I'm trying to be reasonable I told him we can go as  her an I can get to know her first before she comes an stays at the house an he acts like that's not enough I mean I'm trying to deal with this an dnt know how to. I dnt know why he is so hell bent on rekindleing this friendship.

Charlotte1608
by Lottie on Jan. 2, 2013 at 2:53 AM
2 moms liked this

 I would hit the roof. It sounds unusual. GL with it.

KelissaMaye
by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 2:58 AM
1 mom liked this
I don't want to be rude, but is it really so hard to add the "d" onto "and" (an is a different word with a different meaning), and the "o" in "don't"??

Also FUCK that. I would not allow that at all. It sounds completely suspicious to me.

Quoting expectnanother:

I did flip out when I read the message an I told him she is not coming to stay at my house an I dnt know her. he told me the only reason he said that was because she lives two an a half hrs away an doesn't see the point of driving all that way an then back. I'm trying to be reasonable I told him we can go as  her an I can get to know her first before she comes an stays at the house an he acts like that's not enough I mean I'm trying to deal with this an dnt know how to. I dnt know why he is so hell bent on rekindleing this friendship.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
mrswilson10
by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 3:01 AM
3 moms liked this

Explain to him why it bothers you without getting angry. I find that when I am talking to DH about things that bother me....when my angry comes on he shuts off. I would say it is better that he is letting you know about all of it and not trying to hide it. I would worry more about the chick and her alterior motives!

expectnanother
by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 3:15 AM

I have talked to him calmly about it an explained my feelings on the whole thing. an he says he doesn't see why I have a problem with it because she  is a friend nothing more. an I am worried about her alterior motive. but I'm trying to be more ok with it but he acts like baby steps are not enough I mean hell i said I would Like meet up with her a few times before throwing it out there that she should come stay a weekend

Quoting mrswilson10:

Explain to him why it bothers you without getting angry. I find that when I am talking to DH about things that bother me....when my angry comes on he shuts off. I would say it is better that he is letting you know about all of it and not trying to hide it. I would worry more about the chick and her alterior motives!


USMCwife0530
by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 3:41 AM
1 mom liked this
Tell him he's giving too much respect to the wrong girl. I've been through that.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
swthrt737
by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 4:59 AM
The Bible clearly says we shouldn't trust man,however i suggest if u love yr Dh then you know his capabilities,in otherwards what actions do you concieve in their r'tionship to be abnormal?
I for one had the same issue when i met James,he had a female frnd -"JACKY" whom anyone would mistake to be he's lover,but after learning who James was for real despite his surroundings,i relaxed bse they're just frnds upto now.
So learn who yr Dh is both spiritually and capably.

Quoting danichaos:

Dont trust any female, even your bestie

moneysaver6
by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 5:09 AM
1 mom liked this
*and

("An" is an entirely different word with a different meaning.)

I wouldn't be okay with my husband behaving that way.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN