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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Why is it the womans job to always cook?

Posted by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:31 PM
  • 139 Replies

The bf and I live together rather recent.  We work opposite shifts.  On the days he works I cook when I get home for my kids, me and make sure he has food when he comes home from work.  He was off all day yesterday.  When I got home at 6pm, he had not even started dinner.  I mentioned it and he said that he wasn't ready to eat.  So at 7:30pm he started roasting a chicken.  Then he wonders why the kids went to bed and I could care less if I ate or not too.  I feel like he thinks it is my job to do the cooking.  I am NOT and I will NOT.  So needless to say for the rest of the night....I was very bitter to him and still am.  When he comes home from work there is food for him to eat.  When I get home on his day off I expect food too. 

After I had no words for him for about an hour he asks why I am so mad.  Also, what do I want to do.  WTF does he think I want to do at 9-9:30pm.  I want to sleep and relax.  I still have yet to speak to him. 

Why do women cater to their man every damn day. 

by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:31 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Snapdragon88
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:36 PM
1 mom liked this
Ok, you need to tell him how you feel. Not speaking to him won't solve a thing. Just tell him you would appreciate dinner on the days you're working.
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MrsApple
by Silver Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:39 PM
1 mom liked this

Ditto.How do you expect him to know what you want when you sulk like a baby?Adults talk things out.

Quoting Snapdragon88:

Ok, you need to tell him how you feel. Not speaking to him won't solve a thing. Just tell him you would appreciate dinner on the days you're working.


CreziaMommyTo2
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:39 PM

i laugh at this, because until CM (in 2007) i never met a woman who said they cater to their man (well except old school grandparents - 1940-60s generation)

my DH does all the cooking, he is also the one who works... if he doesnt cook, we do take out.  we have a housekeeper... but yet we both straighten up, its NOT just me, because i dont work, i am a SAHM and i care for the kids when he is working.

i am NOT a cook, i am not a maid.  I am a mother..

you allow yourself to cater to your man, which is why he expects it.

Quoting 1der1:


Why do women cater to their man every damn day. 


1der1
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:41 PM

So what is your suggestion.....don't cook for him?

Quoting CreziaMommyTo2:

i laugh at this, because until CM (in 2007) i never met a woman who said they cater to their man (well except old school grandparents - 1940-60s generation)

my DH does all the cooking, he is also the one who works... if he doesnt cook, we do take out.  we have a housekeeper... but yet we both straighten up, its NOT just me, because i dont work, i am a SAHM and i care for the kids when he is working.

i am NOT a cook, i am not a maid.  I am a mother..

you allow yourself to cater to your man, which is why he expects it.

Quoting 1der1:


Why do women cater to their man every damn day. 



1der1
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:42 PM

Should be common sense in my eyes.  When I took the food out to start it and he took it from me and put it right back in the fridge. 

Quoting Snapdragon88:

Ok, you need to tell him how you feel. Not speaking to him won't solve a thing. Just tell him you would appreciate dinner on the days you're working.


1der1
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:43 PM

Should be common courtesy for him to do something on his day off.....other than everything for himself. 

Quoting MrsApple:

Ditto.How do you expect him to know what you want when you sulk like a baby?Adults talk things out.

Quoting Snapdragon88:

Ok, you need to tell him how you feel. Not speaking to him won't solve a thing. Just tell him you would appreciate dinner on the days you're working.



lifeforchrist
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:43 PM

actually my dh always cooks for me! even when he's ben gone all day and i stay at homw :)

risaspieces
by Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:44 PM
1 mom liked this
Personally I enjoy cooking for dh, but when he was unemployed he learned how to cook so I wasn't doing everything. I will say that when I felt like I was doing more than my fair share with cleaning, laundry, etc. I talked to him about it, he was used to being waited on and didn't realize that he was doing it. Just talk to him.
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MrsApple
by Silver Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:46 PM

It should,but some people (men and women) just aren't like that.They need to be TOLD things.If you expect food on his days off,tell him!Don't get mad when he doesn't read your mind though.

Quoting 1der1:

Should be common courtesy for him to do something on his day off.....other than everything for himself. 

Quoting MrsApple:

Ditto.How do you expect him to know what you want when you sulk like a baby?Adults talk things out.

Quoting Snapdragon88:

Ok, you need to tell him how you feel. Not speaking to him won't solve a thing. Just tell him you would appreciate dinner on the days you're working.




Snapdragon88
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:49 PM
Talk to him... I'm sure you don't enjoy being mad. Sometimes people just need things explained to them. No one thinks about things the exact same way. I agree that he should do that for you, but it's silly to continue being mad over something that can be easily and calmly talked about and fixed.

Quoting 1der1:

Should be common sense in my eyes.  When I took the food out to start it and he took it from me and put it right back in the fridge. 


Quoting Snapdragon88:

Ok, you need to tell him how you feel. Not speaking to him won't solve a thing. Just tell him you would appreciate dinner on the days you're working.


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