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UP-DATE What would you do, OR THINK about this???

Posted by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:15 PM
  • 150 Replies

I just found out my dear husband has been a little too friendly with a new female friend of him.

I found out through a text that he texted me, WHILE THINKING HE TEXTED TO HER.

"We have talked, texted, e-mailed each other"  "I did not mentioned to you, because OUR RELATIONSHIP BEING FRAGIL due to me, cheating on you, you may NOT BE READY TO TRUST ME YET" 

"I was near her house one time and while WERE TALKING ON THE PHONE... I told her, and she invited me to stop by to have a cup of tea. Her boyfriend was out of town, I was near her place, so I did. We talked for almost a hour, in her living room, She hugged me in my way out her front door and we agreed that next time I WILL BE BRINGING YOU TO MEET HER"

eye rollingUP-DATE:  I called her from my # and my husband's # and nothing. I called her from my friend's # and she answered, when I told her WHO I WAS, she said  "YOU HAVE THE WRONG NUMBER" 

I did call because I THOUGHT if all of this was innocent friendship THEN, SHE WOULD TALK TO ME AND CONTINUING THEIR FRIENDSHIP with all 4 of us AS PART OF IT!!!

 

 

by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:15 PM
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Replies (1-10):
OHgirlinCA
by Silver Member on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:19 PM
8 moms liked this

 It sounds like he cheated on you in the past.  If that is the case, and if he truly wants your relationship to work, then he should know not to go to another woman's house without her SO being there or you being there. 

What you wrote doesn't seem right to me.  It's fishy.

lucky2Beeme
by Silver Member on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:23 PM
3 moms liked this

Invite her over. get a feel for her. if he has cheated I would have some issues with this as well. He doesn't belong  at her house if her man isn't there. Does her man know about your dh?

jmetz4
by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:25 PM
1 mom liked this

Well not telling you about her is NOT the way to regain your trust. I guess talk to him. A lot. I have a hard time trusting too. The little things set me off even though SO hasn't cheated. He has crossed the line in my mind. Things that we talked about when we got together but they weren't a big deal to him (really they aren't but to me they hurt). We just talk it out. Ex cheated on me a lot. No matter how much talking we did, he never stopped cheating. Even though he constantly said he would. 


It sounds like he was worried about hurting you. Whether or not there is more he is not saying, I can't tell. But he almost sounds paniky. Maybe thats not the right word....

tristansmom74
by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:25 PM
6 moms liked this
Ummm. He cheated before and his behavior with this "new friend" is full of lies and sneaking.
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Monsita
by Silver Member on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:26 PM


Quoting OHgirlinCA:

 It sounds like he cheated on you in the past.  If that is the case, and if he truly wants your relationship to work, then he should know not to go to another woman's house without her SO being there or you being there. 

What you wrote doesn't seem right to me.  It's fishy.

It is fishy to me, too!

I just thought that maybe, because of him cheating on me before I WAS MAKING THIS A BIG DEAL!!

MY WHOLE SOUL TELLS ME THERE IS MORE!!

Pink.Frosting
by Member on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:28 PM
2 moms liked this

Ooooohhhhh no.  Oh no, no, no.  He is playing with fire and is soooo going to get burned if he doesn't stop.  I wouldn't be happy *at all*.  Big fat no.  He would have to stop communicating with her.  Period.

thecoffeefairy
by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:31 PM
2 moms liked this
It sounds like bs to me. He needs to earn your trust by being transparent, not by lying more.
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IansMommy2012
by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:33 PM
This. What does her SO think about this?

Quoting lucky2Beeme:

Invite her over. get a feel for her. if he has cheated I would have some issues with this as well. He doesn't belong  at her house if her man isn't there. Does her man know about your dh?

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IansMommy2012
by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:34 PM
I agrees with another post on here hit honestly I would kick his ass to the curb and tell his lil friend she can have him. File the divorce papers and change the locks. Fuck that cheating and coming back bullshit
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OHgirlinCA
by Silver Member on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:35 PM
2 moms liked this

 

Quoting Monsita:

 

Quoting OHgirlinCA:

 It sounds like he cheated on you in the past.  If that is the case, and if he truly wants your relationship to work, then he should know not to go to another woman's house without her SO being there or you being there. 

What you wrote doesn't seem right to me.  It's fishy.

It is fishy to me, too!

I just thought that maybe, because of him cheating on me before I WAS MAKING THIS A BIG DEAL!!

MY WHOLE SOUL TELLS ME THERE IS MORE!!

 I would trust your gut.  More often than not, it's right.

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