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Feeling a little silly. ( porn/sex related)

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:37 PM
  • 10 Replies

I am usually one to say that porn doesn't bother me. That it is up to the couple. However, this morning I saw my husband after he had made himself happy. I don't know why but it really hurt me. I felt like why does he need me when he has a phone. It hasn't been like I haven't been giving him a big ques. I know in the past that my sex drive hasn't been up there but I have been working on it. I don't know. I feel silly for being upset but I am totally upset.

by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:37 PM
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Replies (1-10):
2lilmamas
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 3:01 PM
Well overall how is your sex life. Do you and him watch porn together or does he exclude you?
Inlove2013
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 11:27 PM
I recently just went through something like this w my husband. We have been married for only two days but together for about three years. I was using his phone n the history of his internet dropped down. No I wasn't going through his phone. But there was porn all the way listed down!!! I was pissed. I always said I didn't care. But I thought fuzz he never wanted it. We have a great sex life.. its an about every night deal and we always make it exciting! I dont understand. He says after I fall asleep it browses. I feel so upset about it. Is it normal for men?
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Grumpylilpixy
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:46 AM
I don't have a problem with porn itself. I have a problem with a married man looking at porn. The reason is porn has a tendcy to lead to other things. I have talked to many women who have been through it and have seen it lead to other things. I am one of them. I feel that it is inappropriate to watch vaginas just like he said he wouldn't like me looking a dicks.
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FinchsMommy
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 7:45 AM
2 moms liked this
Been there done that. Our sex life is a once or twice a week kind of thing. That's the pace he wants not me. I used to want and try for it more but it would lead to fights and other issues (mainly trust). I was surprised he didn't want sex at the same amount I did. Not necessarily every night but several times a week. I have up trying, because I knew when he had satisfied himself with porn he wasn't going to be into wanting sex with me as well. It hurt for a while. Made me wonder, what about me wasn't enough and then one day I had this realization. Fantasy aside, he went to porn because he's lazy. It takes much more effort and time to be with me than to rub one out. In the end it had nothing to do with me. And it's his loss.
PartyGalAnne
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 3:01 PM
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You can give a guy sex EVERYDAY and he will still masturbate.

The thing literally has a mind of it's own.

Don't read too much into it.

But now that you know he's taking care of business, maybe you will want to make sure you are more available!


bugsmama149
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 6:49 PM

My opinion is that if a man is gonna cheat, he's gonna do it regardless of whether or not he's a porn viewer.  The way my dh and I look at porn is that it just kinda "gets things going" when one is pleasuring themselves. I go through "lulls" with my libido and I know I'm not giving my dh what he needs. So I actually encourage him to take care of business himself if the mood strikes him. If watchin some porn gets the job done quicker for him, then I'm totally fine with it. Now if he of I would rather watch porn than be with one another, then it would definitely be an issue.

Quoting Grumpylilpixy:

I don't have a problem with porn itself. I have a problem with a married man looking at porn. The reason is porn has a tendcy to lead to other things. I have talked to many women who have been through it and have seen it lead to other things. I am one of them. I feel that it is inappropriate to watch vaginas just like he said he wouldn't like me looking a dicks.


TexasWife
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 10:02 PM

It didn't make me want to be more available. It shut me down to him more. I have told him before a couple of things I "miss". I miss him making me feel sexy instead of just walking up and saying (this is a literal qoute) "Want to have sex?" I need him to help me "rev my engine" instead it just seems cold to me.

Quoting PartyGalAnne:

You can give a guy sex EVERYDAY and he will still masturbate.

The thing literally has a mind of it's own.

Don't read too much into it.

But now that you know he's taking care of business, maybe you will want to make sure you are more available!



Grumpylilpixy
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 10:27 PM

Good point. :O)

Quoting bugsmama149:

My opinion is that if a man is gonna cheat, he's gonna do it regardless of whether or not he's a porn viewer.  The way my dh and I look at porn is that it just kinda "gets things going" when one is pleasuring themselves. I go through "lulls" with my libido and I know I'm not giving my dh what he needs. So I actually encourage him to take care of business himself if the mood strikes him. If watchin some porn gets the job done quicker for him, then I'm totally fine with it. Now if he of I would rather watch porn than be with one another, then it would definitely be an issue.

Quoting Grumpylilpixy:

I don't have a problem with porn itself. I have a problem with a married man looking at porn. The reason is porn has a tendcy to lead to other things. I have talked to many women who have been through it and have seen it lead to other things. I am one of them. I feel that it is inappropriate to watch vaginas just like he said he wouldn't like me looking a dicks.



I am a friend, a wife,a daughter but the best title I have by far is Mother .













maria1613
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 10:33 PM
I fully agree with this. This is how my SO and I are

Quoting bugsmama149:

My opinion is that if a man is gonna cheat, he's gonna do it regardless of whether or not he's a porn viewer.  The way my dh and I look at porn is that it just kinda "gets things going" when one is pleasuring themselves. I go through "lulls" with my libido and I know I'm not giving my dh what he needs. So I actually encourage him to take care of business himself if the mood strikes him. If watchin some porn gets the job done quicker for him, then I'm totally fine with it. Now if he of I would rather watch porn than be with one another, then it would definitely be an issue.


Quoting Grumpylilpixy:

I don't have a problem with porn itself. I have a problem with a married man looking at porn. The reason is porn has a tendcy to lead to other things. I have talked to many women who have been through it and have seen it lead to other things. I am one of them. I feel that it is inappropriate to watch vaginas just like he said he wouldn't like me looking a dicks.


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la_bella_vita
by Bella on Jan. 16, 2013 at 12:25 AM

 It's ok to be upset. Did you talk to him about it?

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