Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

I don't know what to do anymore ),:

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 11:52 PM
  • 14 Replies
1 mom liked this
A couple weeks ago my DHs dad passed away. My DH was the only one in the room when he took his last breath. I was at home in Cali with my 2 children and my 3 neices (so my DHs Ls could go and be with him)



Since then he has not been the same. He will not say anything to me about it at all. The only reason I know what I just told you is because my MIL told me that's what he said. He is not the sweet lover of mine he is a total asshole. He has become very secretive of everything he does everyone he talks to. I try so hard to be happy all the time, to not ask questions and to just let him be but its killing me. He is hiding something from me and I'm falling apart. He got a new phone out a lock on it, changed his password, goes outside to talk to everyone or ignores every call/txt when he is with me ALWAYS has his phone face down and if he checks it he always turns so that I can never see the front of his phone. He sucks at hiding things from me and he is so odviouse about about it. I'm dying inside, I'm losing my fucking mind. I have not said anything to him because if I do he is going to explod on me. The first time I brought it up he flipped a gasket last time I almost touched his phone he damn near had a heart attack. I'm not sure how much longer I can keep my mouth shut before I go insane and lose it.



I just wanna scream

He was just sitting here reading a txt about 10 mins ago and started crying but tried to hide it from me I asked him if he was ok and he said yes I'm fine nothing is wrong. (With tears in his eyes) Then said I will be better if you get me a beer baby? As I walked away to get him one he wiped the years from his eyes.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 11:52 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
ReadWriteLuv
by Casey on Jan. 14, 2013 at 11:55 PM

Well, eventually you are going to have to ask him what is going on, and inevitably he is going to blow a gasket about it, so rather than stew about it and drive yourself nuts wondering what is going on, just confront him and get it over with.

Corina1987
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:00 AM
1 mom liked this
He may be going through grief and depression but that doesnt make it ok for him to treat you bad. You should be able to talk to him without being afraid of an explosion. You can tell him how he is making you feel, what can help (counseling or better communication), then tell him what will happen if he doesnt do those things. Maybe you could even write all this in a letter to avoid yelling. You deserve to be happy.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Ruffnekwife87
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:08 AM
I already have once and he is still doing it


Quoting ReadWriteLuv:

Well, eventually you are going to have to ask him what is going on, and inevitably he is going to blow a gasket about it, so rather than stew about it and drive yourself nuts wondering what is going on, just confront him and get it over with.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
ReadWriteLuv
by Casey on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:11 AM

Ok, you said you did it once and he blew up. Then, you stated that you wanted to do it again but were afraid he'd just blow up again. So, go back in for another try, and let him blow up again. 

Quoting Ruffnekwife87:

I already have once and he is still doing it


Quoting ReadWriteLuv:

Well, eventually you are going to have to ask him what is going on, and inevitably he is going to blow a gasket about it, so rather than stew about it and drive yourself nuts wondering what is going on, just confront him and get it over with.



ReadWriteLuv
by Casey on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:12 AM

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Were you the one who had the husband with the sick Dad and were concerned that the husband was getting too close with the Dad's nurse?

Hottmomma607
Report
Monday!
Yesterday at 12:50 PM
by Trica on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:19 AM

So he loss his father but you are thinking he's cheating? I don't understand? Maybe you should try to say I know you are hurt,but when you're ready please talk to me! Nope he shouldn't take things out on you! We all grieve differently! My dad passed away 3yrs. ago I am still grieving!

Ruffnekwife87
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:22 AM
No… my husband was out there with his 3 sisters and brother. When my DH was not with them he was alone in the room with his dad. The nurse and doctors were male. His dad was in a coma for 3 weeks the passed due to cancer at the last min


Quoting ReadWriteLuv:

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Were you the one who had the husband with the sick Dad and were concerned that the husband was getting too close with the Dad's nurse?


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Ruffnekwife87
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:25 AM
I don't think he is cheating I think he is talking to people he knows I would be pissed about. Or talking to his friends about things I wish he would talk to me about but won't. He was just sitting here reading a txt about 10 mins ago and started crying but tried to hide it from me


Quoting Hottmomma607:

So he loss his father but you are thinking he's cheating? I don't understand? Maybe you should try to say I know you are hurt,but when you're ready please talk to me! Nope he shouldn't take things out on you! We all grieve differently! My dad passed away 3yrs. ago I am still grieving!


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Hottmomma607
Report
Monday!
Yesterday at 12:50 PM
by Trica on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:30 AM

Give him time

Quoting Ruffnekwife87:

I don't think he is cheating I think he is talking to people he knows I would be pissed about. Or talking to his friends about things I wish he would talk to me about but won't. He was just sitting here reading a txt about 10 mins ago and started crying but tried to hide it from me


Quoting Hottmomma607:

So he loss his father but you are thinking he's cheating? I don't understand? Maybe you should try to say I know you are hurt,but when you're ready please talk to me! Nope he shouldn't take things out on you! We all grieve differently! My dad passed away 3yrs. ago I am still grieving!



Grumpylilpixy
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:31 AM
Sorry mama. Sometimes seeing someones death can make a person turn 360 degrees.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)