Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Help I am so confused :(

Posted by   + Show Post
Well this isn't something I would normally ask people I don't know well for advise but I just want some other opinions on my situation. Well I met the man of my dreams and we have a baby girl now. Thing is he has left us off and on since I found I was preggo. He left twice during my pregnancy and even missed her birth. Then he left when she was 6 months old and I was devastated. After nearly 4 months I decided maybe he would never come back so I met someone. Someone I had been friends with for awhile though. He is great and loves all my kids. He made me forget about all the pain. And the bonus is that he is a single dad too. Well a few days ago my babys daddy returned and said he wants to come home. Now I am torn. He wants to come back in 2 weeks so I have to decide. I love him with my whole heart and soul but I am afraid of making a mistake. My kids are very mad at me for wanting to take him back :( everything was going perfect and now its all a mess....help :(
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 2:15 PM
Replies (21-30):
rockinmomto2
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 5:32 PM

Don't let him back. Seriously, he's done this so many times before, why keep setting yourself up like that? Just tell him no and that you're happy with someone else.

catrig
by Bronze Member on Jan. 18, 2013 at 6:42 PM

HYou are an idiot if you take him back.

Christywf
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 7:38 PM

Don't take him back.  He left 3 times already, that's enough for a STRIKE, YOU'RE OUT!

It's hard but please don't take him back.  He will just leave again when it's convenient for him.  And he sounds like a horrible dad since he is leaving all the time.  HUGS

sadee456
by Member on Jan. 18, 2013 at 7:45 PM

I have been in your shoes girl. Honestly, I would stay romantically involved with your new man and allow your baby's father to be just that, a father. Nothing more, you have a man for you, who is also a secondary father figure to your children. If everything is perfect, do not mess it up, expecially if it will upset/hurt your children.

HasNoIdea93
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 7:52 PM

Personally I would not take him back, look at his track record. He comes and goes when he pleases and he does it because you allow him too. I dated a guy like this and he only came back when he wanted sex and after i got pregnant he left again. After i gave the baby up he asked why and wanted to come back again. Heck no. I know this guys MO he is no good honey. The other guy sounds like he really loves you and your kids and i would still with him. Tell the Ex to shove off, he is only using you and if your kids don't like him then theres your answer. Kids come first and if they don't want him then you shouldn't either because obviously they see his true nature better then you do.  Listen to your kids, move on.

mamanay041010
by Member on Jan. 18, 2013 at 8:23 PM
The man of your dreams wouldn't have left you and toyed with you constantly...unless you're into nightmares.. you'll throw away something good for a man child who only comes around sometimes..hebis going to come in ruin a family and leave again.
MomToovey
by Marianne on Jan. 18, 2013 at 10:06 PM

 He's already done it twice before, there's nothing stopping him from doing it again. And as another mom mentioned, if your kids are unhappy with your decision, they need to come first - after all, they've been there for you and he hasn't. Sometimes the right choice is the harder one, but you know what you need to do.

MomToovey
by Marianne on Jan. 18, 2013 at 10:07 PM
1 mom liked this

 That's kind of what I was thinking too

Quoting mamanay041010:

The man of your dreams wouldn't have left you and toyed with you constantly...unless you're into nightmares.. you'll throw away something good for a man child who only comes around sometimes..hebis going to come in ruin a family and leave again.

 



LoraKuhn
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:21 PM

I have to agree with everyone else, don't take him back, he will leave again. Give the new guy a chance, I think you'll be much happier that way and, your kids definitey will be.

klbetts
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:50 PM
Tell him that when he left the last time it was the last time and he is no longer welcome in your home.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN