advice from ppl who have been in this situation only--a bit long but juicy worth a few minutes to read

[bethany0199]

infedility

will state i am 4 mo pregnant with his child we are not married but have been dating 3 yrs i wrote this to his ex wife and his childs mother [we are on friend terms] 

tell me what you think about my situation other than its real shtty and please dont tell me to leave him thats obvious 

ALSO THIS IS THE FIRST I KNOW OF HIM CHEATING

BF  has hurt me.. u may not find this as a shock but he cheated on me with a girl from his past .. about 2 weeks ago i am torn hurt beyond and i just dont know what to do.. i love this fool so much but he cheated i know our relationship really is not your biz but i feel like u can give me insight and help me make the decision to leave him permanently or what

HER REPLY

FIRST OF ALL, I WANNA SAY I KNOW EXACTLY HOW U FEEL. HE HURT ME TOO AND HE'S THE ONLY MAN THAT HAS HURT ME. THE THINGS IS THAT YA"LL HAVE A BABY TOGETHER AND I DONT THINK U SHOULD BE SELFISH IN YA DECISION MAKING. P TENDS TO BE A BETTER FATHER WHEN HE'S IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS BABY MOTHER. HE MISSED OUT ON A LOT OF YEARS WHEN IT COMES TO HIS SON. IM NOT SURE HOW LONG HE HAS BEEN CHEATING ON U WITH HER OR IF ITS SOMETHING NEW. MY FIRST INSTINCT IS TO TELL U TO LEAVE HIS ASS. BUT WHEN I THINK ABOUT WHAT I'VE BEEN THRU. I THINK THAT MAYBE U SHOULD TALK TO P AND GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE IF HE'S WILLING TO CHANGE. BUT IT'S LIKE UR TAKING A CHANCE ON GETTING HURT AGAIN.

IT'S A DAMN SHAME HE'S DOING THE SAME SHIT AND WITH HER. HER ASS GOT LIKE 4 KIDS.

ALso does it sound like she regrets not giving him a chance

[MagicTemptation]

I am sorry you are going through this. You don't want us to point out the obvious. What would you like us to say? Or is this just a vent?

[nicole6870]

Sorry. No real advice. If he's done it twice...well that ought to tell you enough.

[mommykm]

Hun, your worrying about the wrong thing. She sounds like shes being sencere and honest. Shes telling you its hard being a single mom bc it is. So to think it through and if theres any chance to make it work then do so bc she doesnt want u to go through what SHE has gone through. Hes a lying cheating asshole and doesnt deserve a good woman.

[pittymama]

i'm confused.. what exactly are you asking? what you should do? uhh.. "the obvious".. leave? i don't get what you're wanting to hear? dump that "fool" and find someone worth while. were you wanting to hear that you should stay and work it out?

[bcauseimthemom]

Holy cow... release the caps lock and type in English. What the hell are you trying to say?

[justpeachy71904]

I am so confused. But I am guessing you want support. ? I am sorry I mean I couldn't imagine. I wasn't pregnant when I found out my dd's sperm donor was messing around in me but I was 2 months pp. It hurt. I left court months after that. Imo raising a child in a situation with two unhappy parents is not a good idea. If he is straying now he is unhappy.

[JennPearce]

If it were a 1 time mistake I could see trying to make it work, but obviously this isn't. He's been messing around with the same girl that he cheated on his ex with. Save yourself some heartache and run as fast as you can. A child isn't guaranteed a happy future just because parents stay together. If you aren't happy that'll show. Good luck in whatever you decide, as long as you're happy!

[ihave1]

 if you are leaving him, why care.  Just move one w/ your life & be happy. 

[ihave1]

 holy cow...it is still in english. 

Quoting bcauseimthemom:

Holy cow... release the caps lock and type in English. What the hell are you trying to say?

 

[Lindalou907]

He's probably in love with both of you, he's not going to change. So, you have to decide if you can live with that or not.