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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Does this make me a bad wife?

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I'm not trying to be innappropriate, I really want to know if I'm the only one....I HATE when DH wants oral sex. I avoid it at all costs, and get mad when he pushes me to do it. Does that make me a bad wife? (According to him it does). Does it make me selfish? What are your thoughts on the subject?

by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 11:28 PM
Replies (271-280):
MomToovey
by Marianne on Jan. 24, 2013 at 10:38 PM

 No it doesn't make you a bad wife. And the fact that he's not respectful of your feelings (he knows you don't like to do it and yet he still pushes you and calls you selfish?) makes him a jerk of a husband. The man you're sharing your life with shouldn't be forcing you to do something you don't want to do. And when he calls you names - to the point where you start questioning whether or not it's true, is abuse in my opinion.

Raveyk
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 12:20 AM

I don't really like to do it either. Soemtimes I get in the mood and love to throw it in as foreplay because he loves it so much and it makes me happy to please him but ONLY when I get in that mood. I don't really like to do it but Ithink that makes it more of a special thing when I do ;)

Raveyk
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 12:22 AM
1 mom liked this


I don't really like receiving it either! The whole thing just seems kind of dirty and makes me uncomfortable. He loves to give it and then wants to kiss me! EWWW! it's like our 1 intamacy issue lol

DanaB1019
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 7:14 AM

I agree. Sometimes compromise or even sacrifice is normal. You shouldn't feel like you HAVE to do anything.

Quoting Taynhannahsmom:

No it doesn't make you a bad wife. Nothing wrong with not liking oral. It's not for everyone.


mghtymffn
by Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 11:16 AM

question- did you do it alot when you were dating? and if not when he ask you can change the subject or just tell him how you honestly feel but at the same you  need to know he is telling you what he wants too...there has to be a compromise in that dept, because it can affect your marriage big time.

kaisermama
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 3:23 PM

each to their own. if you don't like it he needs to understand that. he shouldn't be pushing you to do something you don't want to do!

sevensmommy
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 6:36 PM

My husband does the same thing hes like come on Im your husband plz do it id do it for you. I completely do not like it and at first I did it just to avoid a fight or him treating me like shit because I didnt do it but now I dont care either way.

petamarie
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 12:14 PM

I love it but if you dont like it,thats cool. It does'nt make you a bad or selfish wife.

thatislife
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 3:59 PM

Well, not having read the whole thread just a few to see if you provide more info I woud say it isn't the nicest wife behavior in the world.  I am wondering if you once did it and then refused or if he knew when he married you this would be on the no list.  I look at it like this, if this is important and the one sole legitimate way he can get it is to come to his wife to get that need met and he is doing that as he should and is constantly refuseds then that isn't the greatest of things.  Seems like there should be some kind of compromise on how often.  Sometimes as spouses we just do things to make our signifigant others happy whether we love it or not.  Sure there are a lot of guys who would be glad to skip the foreplay and get to the main event but if they were refusing to do what pleased the wife we would be on here talking about what a selfish azz they are.

Monica_0812
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 4:34 PM
Dh never pushes me to do it. I do it maybe once every 3 months. If you don't like doing it then don't. He needs to understand that.
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