8 Things Every Couple Should Do for a Successful Marriage - How do you keep your marriage healthy?
8 Things Every Couple Should Do for a Successful Marriage
Marriage. Unless your name happens to be Cinderella, there's a super slim chance you and your hubby are going to live happily ever after. Divorce rates
are higher than ever, with something like 11 out of every 10 marriages
ending in splitsville. (Note: I may be slightly off in my math.)
No marriage is perfect. But you know what? It doesn't have to be! It just needs to be successful so you and your spouse can live a long and happy life together.
Nobody enters a marriage thinking it could one day end. Romance has a way of blinding the future. But reality eventually sets in. Couples get into routines. Money and communication issues inevitably worm their way into your relationship. Before you know it, you're on a roller-coaster you never even signed up for.
That's not to say marriage can't be wonderful. It certainly can. And with just a little bit of effort, you can help make it last by following these 8 things every couple should do for a successful marriage.
1. Never Go to Bed Angry - This is a great rule to follow. No matter how upset you are, don't let your emotions fester. Talk it out. Even if you don't agree, at least agree to disagree before going to bed for the night. Besides, sleeping on the couch is really bad for your back.
2. Think Small - All the little things you do make a huge difference. That could be setting up the coffee pot every morning for your husband, or having your hubby gas up your car when it's close to empty. See, size does matter.
3. Be Impulsive - The longer you're married, the more set in your routine you'll be. It's just human nature. So "plan" on being impulsive. Out of the blue, do something sweet for your spouse. Gift a song via iTunes. Mail a Hallmark card. Leave a note on the pillow.
4. Compromise - Guys? Suck it up. Go watch a chick flick with your wife. In return, ladies, don't give your guy grief next time he's watching football. Basically, respect each other's interests and do a lot of give and take. The exception, of course, being Twilight. No man should ever have to suffer through that.
5. Be Your Own Person - Probably one of the most important things to remember is that besides being a happily married couple, you are an individual. It's okay (and healthy!) to do your own thing, whether it's exercising, a girls' night out, or playing poker with the guys. Enjoy your own time and be happy your spouse is enjoying his or hers too. Just be sure they're not enjoying it too much ...
6. Make Time - The older you get, the crazier and busier you get -- from working overtime to driving the kids all over the place. When life's at its craziest, that's when you really need to take a breath and set up some time together. Whether it's a real date night out on the town or just snuggling up on the couch with a good movie, make the effort to make the time.
7. Laugh More - Seriously, laughter really is the best medicine. Crack a joke. Shove a pie in your face. Use more whoopee cushions. Whatever it takes, just relax and enjoy life.
8. Be Thankful - Don't take your spouse for granted. So what if he's made dinner every night since you've been married. You should still thank him. If it tastes good, that is.
How do you keep your marriage healthy?
I have learned in a marriage being humble is the way to go ;) You have to be willing to fight for your marriage. Many sacrafices and respect. Marriage is amazing the way it can grow. I also understand there is a thin line between love and hate, Boy do I! I adore my family. My husabnd is my best friend and I never want to picture my life without him. I love you Vanilla Bean ^_^
I agree with them all except the constantly-stated "Don't go to bed angry." Sometimes it's okay. Sometimes things can't be worked out in one night and sometimes you're just too tired. Sometimes you need time. I prefer to follow the rule: "Don't go to bed without telling your SO you love them - and meaning it." You can be mad, but never refuse to give them that affirmation of your love.
I'm with AimSnapHolz: I hate don't go to bed angry! Sometimes you both are just too tired to come to a mutual agreement.
I also agree with MrsShipley21: Be willing to fight for your marriage.
My Dh and I almost split b/c he refused to fight. He'd let me yell and throw a fit and not say anything back... It led to him looking for a more friendly face... We went to marriage counseling and our counselor told him he needs to validate what I'm upset about. Just show you're listening even if you don't agree.
That was almost 2 years ago now.
The best advice I got out of our sessions was; You each have to keep doing little things to stay together.
Definitely #6 and #7. It may not be romantic but we put our date nights on the calendar much like any other important appointment, so things like the sitter is arranged ahead of time. These grown-up evenings out are actually the subscription concert dates to our local symphony so on these nights we can look forward to getting dressed up and spending time together to enjoy one of our favorite activities. And our boys actually look forward to these date nights because they get to spend the evening with their sitter, a friend of the family whom they adore, like another grandmother.
As for #7, I think it's important that a couple allow each other the room to grow and cultivate and pursue new interests (and maintain old ones). A marriage isn't static but is a dynamic entity, and so are the people in it. A strong relationship should be fluid enough to allow for growth (emotionally, intellectually, etc.) of each individual.
I like "think small." It's universal, applicable to everything.
Everything but the "don;t go to bed angry". Sometimes, it is better to sleep on it. Even if that means a few days of sleeping on it. I would rather take the time and cool off, than attack the situation, saying things in the heat of the moment I will later regret. Trust me, we have been there, and waiting is sometimes better than try to settle or rush the process(depending on what the issue is).
Quoting AimSnapHolz:I agree with them all except the constantly-stated "Don't go to bed angry." Sometimes it's okay. Sometimes things can't be worked out in one night and sometimes you're just too tired. Sometimes you need time. I prefer to follow the rule: "Don't go to bed without telling your SO you love them - and meaning it." You can be mad, but never refuse to give them that affirmation of your love.
not sure why it is bothering me but
CafeMom's "Unofficial Start of Summer" Party has begun!  Celebrate with us by joining in our fun ga
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on Jan. 26, 2013 at 10:50 AM