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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

should i take this out?!

Posted by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:19 PM
  • 9 Replies
My husband and i have been married almost 5 years, wehave three kids (4,2,7mo). We always fight, and almost split up at least once a year. We got in a huge fight, and i said i don't have to leave, he should, the house is just as much mine as his. He said no. Then i said i get either the tax return ($9000) or the house, he said i could take the money and go. Is this my chance? I only work part time and barely bring home $700 a month, that's always been a huge fear of mine about leaving. Now i could have this money that would help me get on my feet. I'm so unhappy in this marriage, but fear being a single mom to three and fear what everyone would say. I'm also afraid of losing my inlaws, they are my only family here. Any advice? And we have been in counseling for about 5 months, sometimes i think its helping, but i can't get over the fact that I'm still unhappy.
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by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:19 PM
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Replies (1-9):
C.Fleury
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:24 PM
That's a tough situation. I found myself in almost the similar one many many years ago. Have him the same option. He said house or the money, I took the money and never looked back. Was tough for the first year. But damn it was worth it. Good luck hun !!!
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TheMommaJessie
by Bronze Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:24 PM

if you are not happy then your children will be unhappy. leave

me-n-mygirls
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:24 PM
keep up couseling if it seems to be working. Things dont change overnight and your feeling (depression) is one of them.
If you truely feel the need/desire to leave then do it. but remember to fix it sometimes it gets a lil worse before getting better!
good luck.
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afwifeandmommy3
by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:27 PM
I'd take half and save it and leave half . Dh and I do this . It makes it so I'm never screwed .
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earthangel1967
by YVONNE on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:28 PM

 I can't really say bc only you know if you are at the point of no hope for the marriage or love has been lost or unforgivable things have been done.

I dont know how much the house is worth so not sure if that is a good deal for you or not.

I know one thing from my own experience it feels a lot better to be in NO relationship or even divorced than it does to be in a bad marriage and life is too short and too priceless to be unhappy or feel trapped.

There are going to be pros and cons in your life regardless of what choice you make, you just need to decide what you feel OVERALL is in your best interest for the longterm and your future. Think of yourself when you are old on your deathbed..... (that scenario helped me make a similar decision) and think of whether you would have regrets for leaving or for not leaving and if you dont leave or if you do leave would you be haunted by what if's ..... what would your future self advise you to do NOW to help ensure the best and happiest tomorrow? Do that.

View Full Size ImageYVONNE

furbabymum
by Gold Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 3:28 PM

 Happiness is a choice dear. Choose it and you'll be happy.

Sounds like you guys are in an unhealthy pattern of communication. If leaving is an option than neither of you have much incentive to stick it out. If counseling isn't helping find a different counselor. Not all counselors are created equally.

biancalina20
by Bianca Lina on Jan. 28, 2013 at 3:53 PM
Im so sorry. Only u know what u should do
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ReadWriteLuv
by Casey on Jan. 28, 2013 at 4:25 PM
Take the cash and run. You may not get a chance for a better deal that the whole tax return!!!
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Serenity7
by Platinum Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 4:56 PM

 You should do what is best for you

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