I think I should leave, but for some reason I keep holding on...need advice!
In a relationship for over two years. I live with him and his two young daughters. He is an army vet and has some issues from being deployed. Has led to anxiety and ptsd along with a serious drinking problem. I think that he want's to stop but doesn't have the will power and doesn't think that getting counseling will help because "if they haven't been overseas they won't understand and can't help me". So, his drinking has led to him not really caring much about anything...misses work due to his drinking at times, poor hygeine at times, lots of money spent on alcohol even though we are behind on the bills, complete change in personality when he drinks excessively, etc. All he wants to do most of the time is play his gaming system which might I add is a war game and drink. I have to beg him to do anything around the house to help and he never wants to spend time with me anymore and when asked why said "you're not fun anymore". Well, I agree I'm probably not...I work full time and take care of all responsibilities around HIS house. I 'm constantly "bitching" at him for his drinking and lack of care for anything else. I've become very angry, distant, and resentful. I'm not saying I'm perfect pretty sure I've handled things the wrong way when I try to confront him about his issues. I just get so mad because I know he's capable of so much more and he won't try until I've otten to the point I threaten to leave. I do love him and feel for him for what he's been through, but he can't use that as a crutch the rest of his life. Just lost right now, I have a very stressful job and when I come home it's just as stressful. I don't know how much longer I can do this. I feel like if I leave, I'm giving up on him and if it were me that was going through this I would want someone that would fight for me. I realize I can't make him change, and I don't know that he ever will and i don't want to spend years of my life on someone that doesn't care more about himself or me. I already wasted 10 years of my life being married to a man that I found out was having multiple affairs and got a 19 year old pregnant! I want a "normal", stable life and to have a child of my own one day. I just turned 34 and I feel like time is ticking away. I just wish I could snap my fingers and he would be the man I fell in love with again. :(