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My Husband won't wake up before 10am !

Posted by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 8:57 PM
  • 24 Replies

So heres the story, my husband and I work from home, he runs his own business which is very busy everyday and I help him out as well as have my own business I do at home, we both have separate offices ect. 

I wake up everyday early to get house work things done before I start working but he will not get out of bed until 10 or 11am ! I get so mad at him because ive been up already for hours doing things around the house and working. 
I cant understand why he is not motivated to wake up earlier ! To make matter even worse he sleeps on the couch with the TV on most nights and doesnt come to bed until early hours of the morning and wakes me up.

Ive tried to understand him and think about why he is doing this, ive tried to help him with herbal sleeping aids and tried to encourage him to come to bed with me. Ive tried to make him understand how its effecting us, it makes us fights and our sex life is not great because he is never in bed and when he is im awake !!

I dont have pacience any more for this behaviour, I feel like he is acting like a teenager. what example is that for our future children ?
We are 'trying' for a baby.

each morning he has a new excuse, or he just says sorry.

ive tried so many things ! Ive even signed us up to the gym and told him that we have to go in the morning before we start working, like 9am. In my mind I was trying to give him a good reason to get up early and be excited for the day ( he loves working out ) BUT this hasnt worked........he still sleeps in and says we should go to the gym at 12pm after he wakes up ! This doesnt work for me because im busy working at that time and it completely messes up my day.

Please any advice..... 

by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 8:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:53 PM
1 mom liked this

OMG! This sounds like my problem. Only we have a child together. He is 2 1/2 yrs old and at that stage where every moment he wants to play. My boyfriend says "you know I like my sleep!" I have left for a weekend to make him realize what he misses. He changes then goes back to the same. Overall I think his actions are trying to tell you something. Whether it is he's not fully into the idea of a baby or if he is not as committed  to you as much as you would like. You definitely need to sit down and talk to him. Tell him how you are feeling and make up your mind how much more you will deal with. But please please please DO NOT have a child with this man until this is resolved. It will only get worse. Much worse.  Trust me honey as hard as it might be now a kid adds so much more to the picture. Good luck. 

by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:18 AM
1 mom liked this

No more trying for a baby with this lazy boy. OMGosh! Time to leave him, or start pouring cold water on his head. Time to move on with someone else. This guy is NOT ever going to change, and your fooling yourself if you think he's going to. Because he won't.

by Bronze Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 8:27 AM

He may have thyroid issues. Hypothyroid causes you to be tired all the time and require more sleep. I have it and I need at least 10 hours of sleep a night or I can't function. Or he may be depressed. Depression makes it super hard to get up and going. Or sleep apnea. If he has trouble breathing while he is asleep he would be waking up multiple times a night and not sleeping well.

I don't think you should leave him until you find out if he is having health problems first. Thyroid is a simple blood test. Depression is fairly easy to recognize as well. Talk to him and ask him to get checked for both.

by Michele on Feb. 14, 2013 at 9:29 AM

After 20 years my dh is the same. I have had our main bathroom torn up for over a month, there is a ton of work needed to be done, he has worked on it 2x in one month. It will be like everything else he rips it up and never finishes it, but bitches about not having time, but will lie in bed till 10-11 every day is he can. Right now there is hole in our den ceiling, we are down to one tiny bathroom, because one is unusable, I have an unfinished floor in our foyer, missing tile in the kitchen unfinished mud room, unfinished powderoom, missing railing, which has been in boxes in the basement for two years. I am sure there is more I am not thinking of right now.

by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 12:36 PM

So you have different sleep scheduals, big deal! Get over it!  As for the sex, you know you can initiate things before going to bed.  If it's that much of a problem move on and find someone else that fits your schedual better.  

by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 1:55 PM
Wow. Are you completely unaware that not everyone has the same sleep cycle? Everyone's body clock is different, you can't change that.
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by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 1:58 PM

hehe sounds like my house, it doesn't bother me though, i tend to get mad when he comes to bed before 2 cuz i like to sleep in the middle

by Bronze Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 2:02 PM

I not understanding what the problem is. why does he have to get up early? he has his own business and can set his own hours. so what if he wants to sleep till 10am? not everybody is an early morning person. I'm not. I am a night owl and can't go to bed and wake up early no matter how hard I try. I am just not a morning person. sounds like your husband isn't either. you need to just accept that. there is nothing wrong with him being that way. I know it can be hard if you are an early morning person. but you 2 are opposites and have to just accept that and work around it. but again I don't see the big deal here. something like that will never change. good luck.

by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 2:05 PM

His sleep schedule isn't what bothers me.  If I don't have to get up, I tend to go to bed at 1 or 2 and get up between 9 or 10.  But, I don't watch tv or sleep on the couch.  I work, I go to school, I get things done.  I hike with my dogs almost every day, and I never go until the afternoon.  That's my schedule, but I'm productive.  So the question is whether he is productive or whether he is possible depressed.  If he has sleeping issues at night, no energy, and wants to sleep all day, it is possible he is depressed.

You should not be trying to have a baby until you settle these issues and have reached a place of peace. 

by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 2:07 PM

 I think the problem is the TV. He's not able to get to sleep because he's stimulating his brain every night. He needs to turn off the TV an hour before bedtime and then he needs to come to bed with you.

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