Me and DF need help. We have absolutely amaizing days, ok days, and absolutely horrible days. I know that it is unrealistic to never fight, and agree on everything. that is not what I am looking for. But I do feel as though our love has become habit. We dont love on eachother (non-sexually) like we use too. And it has caused a lot of fights, that shouldnt ever happen. We cant afford couples counseling, even though I really want to go (and I believe he would as well) so I have looked up a lot of things online about how to break the habit of love, and make it real love again, what needs done in relationships to keep them uplifting and not falling into habit mode, and how to argue, forgive, build trust, and make promises correctly.
I have decided that it would be great for us each to come up with 5 realistic promises of changes we will make to better the relationship, and 5 things that we want changed in our relationship, whether it be something we want the other person to change, or something for us to change together (like one thing i want is us to excersize together once a week). My problem is, how do I get DF to understand exactly what I mean when he hasnt read everything I have? I know our minds work differently. Hes a guy. I am a girl. And though just saying "Write down 5 promises and 5 wants to better our relationship" seems like common sense to understand to me, I know, he may not get it completely, and think as deep as he needs too.
I also know, that it is possible we wont be able to fix this on our own, but I want to try. And if it fails, we will just have to cut somewhere in our spending money so that we can afford the counseling.