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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

im beginning to think there is something wrong with him!!!!!!!

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Long story short....We have a lot of debt we own 2 homes, 2 car payments and around 60k in bank loans and credit cards. Hubby wanted a new quad for a long time, i knew there really would never be a good time and was sick of hearing him bitch so i said just go ahead. (15k later) . So i do the finances and were pretty much at our limit with no spending money. He gets home from work today and goes to the bedroom  and makes a phone call, comes out and tells me he has to go somewhere its a surprise well i bitch enough that he tells me he bought a jimmy or some shit for 500$ for me. WTF i have a 2009 F150 why would i want a 90's piece o'crap suv????? that by the way needs some work and i can not afford insurance on another car either. He proceeds to call me a ungrateful bitch???? Im so mad. I just don't get him right now, i wish we could be on the same page with finances. Dont really have a questions just needed to vent. Any opinions are welcome.

by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 10:50 PM
Replies (51-53):
Dee0886
by Bronze Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 12:34 AM

Omg. I'd be fine after that purchase bc I'd be using his life insurance money after strangling him!! You need to sit him down and get his spending under control....who buys a jimmy these days?? I think you guys need to talk to a financial advisor....

Wife to an amazing, loving, and respectful man. Mommy to a handsome man who gets his kicks from making others smile, and a beautiful little girl with an old soul and nurturing spirit. Expecting in May.

JessM3
by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 1:28 AM

 im the spender in my relationship.... he'll realize that he has made a mistake ... good news you guys can prob flip the truck and get the money back... thats if he wants to part with it... i hope everything works out for the good! God bless!

MagicTemptation
by Christina on Mar. 24, 2013 at 7:32 PM
It has never been a subject for discussion. How and where S/O and I spend our money is no one else's concern. No one has ever made a comment of where or how we shop.
Quoting furbabymum:

 Does your family understand? My mom totally doesn't get our budgeting. When we went furniture shopping for the nursery it was on craigslist. She just doesn't get it. I guess it's harder for her to understand because we make the most money in the family but have the least new stuff. lol Stuff was never particularly important to me anyway but when she sees my hand me down couch it about kills her. Oddly enough it makes me like my couch even more.

Quoting MagicTemptation:

Oh wow! I am sorry. I don't know that I can offer much advice unless you both are willing to change. And I saw both because prior to this incident you both have alot of debt raked up.

We follow the Dave Ramsey plan. We don't have any credit cards. We believe if we don't have the cash, we really don't or shouldn't spend.  We both drive older used vehicles and we baby them. I have a 2005 Grand Caravan I bought for $800, put a few hundred in it on repairs. It works great. It doesn't look shiny or pretty but that doesn't bother me. He has a 2004 mustang that has been through hell and back. It is also fully paid. Our only debt is our mortgage (a fixer upper). We have basic on all of our bills. We shop at local garage sales and thrift stores, we actually love it bc it is like a treasure hunt for us. We enjoy fixing things up and giving them our own personal twists. 

If you really want to try to change, make a spreadsheet of ALL finances down to the last cent. Then show him where you guys can make cuts, and where you can apply that extra money to beat down other debts you can't get out from under. Show him how much in interest you guys are paying. Show him how long with the way things currently are it will take to be debt free. Most men are visual creatures so they do better with actually seeing it laid out for them. 

 

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