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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

9 times out of Ten when you go looking you will find.. Whats in the Dark comes to Light

My heart is heavy. My bf of eight years has a lock on his phone but if he falls asleep with a movie play I go in for the kill and generally find something everytime. Some things are minor and some are major. Tonight was major. Kind of sums up why I been having all these problems since 2012. Apparently his ex reached out to him and they have been exchanging feeling since October last year on and off and making phone calls. NOthing describe as to a meet ups ( she actually stated she is upset they cant hangout) apparently her husband got her phone records and even involved my bf mom to get info. Crazy his mom even knew and never mention to me. But he wonders why I don't care for his mom too much. Apparently the ex still talks to his family. I am just heart broken. I keep reading the emails I forwarded to myself for evidence over and over again. I know when people go thru things ppl tend to find someone to reach out to . Apparently they both were looking for an outlet thru their misery... The things he said about regretting leaving her or thinking about her daily etc etc.. will always love her ..etc etc. but you speak to her in October but propose to me in dec 2012... that has been put on hold but I am in shock.. Usually I would wake him up and scream and I decided to wake him up and tell him I seen stuff in his phone and before I blow up he needs to go upstairs in bed so I can be alone downstairs. I briefly told him what I say... ( emails with him and his ex) and I am downstairs bout to loose it.. cant sleep with a cup of vodka in my hand. I even thought about emailing the girl but hey.. it takes two and he allowed it .. she actually said she would keep her distance while going through her marriage issue but still Is wanting him at some point in her life is god willing.. blah blah.. I don't want another women to know she hurt me... Lord give me strength and wisdom... Help ladies...
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 1:52 AM
Replies (11-15):
ochoa.mama
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:42 AM
1 mom liked this
There's no reason to ask about this situation ...u already know what to do
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polkaspots
by Bronze Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 5:21 AM
It is possible, but it sounds like he's proving he doesn't have OP as a priority. There's a difference between loving two women and lying to one about the other, but not both.


Quoting Lindalou907:

It's possible for men to love more than one woman. He shouldn't be dishonest though.




Quoting polkaspots:

I agree. OP, it sounds like you're willing to stay with him even though he's not in love with you. He could be the greatest dad in the world, but he doesn't seem to be the right partner for you. I'm sorry.





Quoting SunnyDayz-Ahead:

You were wrong when you said "it takes two, he allowed it"..... it takes three apparently beceause you're allowing it.






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smurfbitebug
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 5:23 AM
Your mother should have taught you that it's OK to be single. Actually, it's pretty fucking grand to be single. Alone and lonely are two different things. You aren't defined by whether or not you are with someone.
Do you even know who you are?
Get out of that mindset.


Quoting blessedmother28:

I agree...Feeling like a sucker for love. I have tried to see if i.could find love elsewhere n havent. guess im scared to be lonely for two long. i have never been single..
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goddiddlyumshis
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 5:34 AM
1 mom liked this
um leave him. and put the stupid cup of vodka down. act like a big girl instead of threatening "i'm not done" if you dont leave youre allowing yourself to get hurt.
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blessedmother28
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 5:36 AM
Lindalou i agree im more upset about the dishonesty. i told him upfront..if this or.that... we just spoke n he said the reason he did it was bcuz we were goin thru things. Excuses....how about.fix the problem prior.
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