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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

See the thing is my boyfriend is watching porn should i be concerned

Posted by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 5:31 AM
  • 26 Replies

me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 4 years now and we have a little boy who will be two in june on the tenth. i have cought him before watching porn and i told him how i felt about it cuz u see our son sleeps with us a lot of the time in bed and i am working on braking that habit but anyways me and my boyfriend had great sex last night and it has been a long time since that happend since our son was born and last time i cought him i told him i don't feel good enough for him if he watchs that crap because as it is we don't have much sex rite now a little more than be4 since our son started sleeping in his own bed i told my boyfriend it hurts my feelings that he watchs that and i asked him not to do it again cuz f how i feel but he did be4 he came to bed and i feel yet again that i may not be enough anymore cuz after having great sex after a long time he watched porn and i have already tried to talk to him about i really don't want to again cuz he already knows so what do you think i should do i am so upset with hm and i don't if it means that i'm not good enough anymore or  what i just need advice i guess on what you  think it means cuz i can't figure it out.

by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 5:31 AM
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Replies (1-10):
DebraMitchell
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 5:52 AM
1 mom liked this
My husband an I are matching it right now...
Normally we ask each other what we LIke most
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Missashley20
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 5:57 AM

i'll try that i just wish i new if i should be conserned or not is it just a guy thing or what.

mbn805
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 6:30 AM
Girl im going through the same thing but when i caught him before it would turn into such an issue that i would cry and he'd loose his privilege of having a phone with web access and when time passed by he'd get another phone and the same thing happened so about couple months ago this happened and i was so tired of it and his lies that i told him one more time and its over and we get a divorce and u loose ur family right so about a week and a half we get phones again and again it happens so right now were n the separating process it hurts that family wasn't stronger than that and the thing s that he said he has a problem doesn't know how to control it so what else should i expect right
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mbn805
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 6:38 AM
And what's sad s that he didn't watch it with the intention to make sex better there was nothing to learn from that and maybe it b different when u try to involve ur partner but he did it to please his sick mind on his own time and still Tried to erase the page so that i wouldn't see it im sorry but to me that's not to improve ur marriage i know I've tried to improve my marriage by reading books like marriage family but healthy advise not anything like washing other men do it u know so girl i can't advise u much but ur not alone
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mbn805
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 6:43 AM
See but that's different cus u do it together and ur trying to find out what he and what u like so ur trying to make it better but for a man that does not involve his partner and its nothing to learn and still tries to erase it what does that make u think


Quoting Missashley20:

me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 4 years now and we have a little boy who will be two in june on the tenth. i have cought him before watching porn and i told him how i felt about it cuz u see our son sleeps with us a lot of the time in bed and i am working on braking that habit but anyways me and my boyfriend had great sex last night and it has been a long time since that happend since our son was born and last time i cought him i told him i don't feel good enough for him if he watchs that crap because as it is we don't have much sex rite now a little more than be4 since our son started sleeping in his own bed i told my boyfriend it hurts my feelings that he watchs that and i asked him not to do it again cuz f how i feel but he did be4 he came to bed and i feel yet again that i may not be enough anymore cuz after having great sex after a long time he watched porn and i have already tried to talk to him about i really don't want to again cuz he already knows so what do you think i should do i am so upset with hm and i don't if it means that i'm not good enough anymore or  what i just need advice i guess on what you  think it means cuz i can't figure it out.


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Mommabearbergh
by Bronze Member on Apr. 5, 2013 at 6:46 AM
I personally see nothing wrong with porn if he wants to smack his noodle then okay. If you want to double click the mouse while watching by yourself I really don't see the big deal in it. Dh watches it I know what genre and stars he likes and it doesn't bother me because I am secure about my looks. I will say sleeping with you kid in the bed can leave a spouse feeling sexually frustrated so he wacks his noodle to porn vs going to some girls house and letting her wack his noodle
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HelloSweetie
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 7:51 AM

I dont think porn is anything to be concerned about.

Try watching it with him?

Mrsmumofboys
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 8:04 AM

I don't think i would feel comfortable with my hubby watching it on his own for the same reasons as you as not feeling good enough for him but we watch it together & always end up having a fun night x

MomToovey
by Marianne on Apr. 5, 2013 at 8:23 AM
1 mom liked this
First off, ignore the ladies who say they don't have a problem with it and that you shouldn't either. This isn't about them, and porn isn't universal. Just because 1 person is ok with it, doesn't mean everyone should be. You're entitled to your own thoughts, opinions, and feelings.
Secondly, you CAN try watching it with him. On one hand, it could bring you closer together. But on the other, it could end up making you feel worse.
If you try it and it's not for you, our if you decide not to try it at all, it may be time for him to choose. When he knows you dislike it and does it anyway, he's being disrespectful. Tell him you won't be putting up with the disrespect any longer. Either he stops, our you're out. You deserve better.
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jsmom01
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 8:25 AM
1 mom liked this

If it is getting in the way of your joint intimacy, then you need to talk to him about it.  Address it head on.  and work through the intimacy struggles.  Many relationships have them, and working through is part of what makes things work in the long haul.

If you watch a softer kind with him, you can use it as an intimacy tool.  Sometimes men can be addicted to it, (the rush of endorphins in their brain).  But, jon't jump there in your brain instantly.  But definitely definitely address it.   And the kid in the bed .... well find a different place to be intimate!!!! 

Although I"m not a fan of co-sleeping, I have some friends that are, and they all have a "place" for intimacy in the house/apt.

Bottom line, if he doesn't want to change it or work through, you can't change him. If he can't stop, you deserve better....  Hopefully it won't come to that for you.

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