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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Regret wedding

Posted by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 10:42 AM
  • 28 Replies
I have 3 kids and were starting the process of looking at houses, i want my fairy tale wedding but i cant justify spending all that money on one day. And i dont want to be stressed out, i want it to be a happy experience.

Should we just wait til we have more money? Do a special i timate ceremony and throw a party later for everyone else? I was also thinking of a surprise wedding, like telling everyone its an engagment party or house warming but really we will be getting married..also with 3 kids we dont get alot of alone time so i was also thinkin of doing something small and use the money for a honeymoon, we could always do a vow renewal down the line..

Any ideas anyone? Ladies that didnt have the big shabang were you ok with it??

Thanks!
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 10:42 AM
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Replies (1-10):
nicole2884
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 10:50 AM
Big weddings are nice but i rather have a vacation alone

I do like the house surprise wedding that wouldn't be expensive

But weddings aren't about size its about the vows thats what makes it special

It seems like bad timing an a house builds a lifetime of memories thats way better than a wedding
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MamaScho88
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 10:58 AM

 Personally, I like to go to big weddings because they are fun, but I didn't want one for myself. My husband felt the same way. We don't like "all eyes on us". We had a private ceremony just the two of us and that was it, which we really liked because it was about us and our vows to eachother...we didn't have the money for a wedding at the time, expecting our 4th child and all. We are planning a small wedding ceremony somewhere down the road that our grandparents, parents and siblings can attend to in a beautiful lodge in the white mountains, stay there for the weekend, theres plenty of activities to do in that area (mini honey moon) and then we want to throw a big casual party to celebrate with all our family and friends. I can't wait, this is exactly what we want and I know we won't regret it. It will save alot of money, and we would rather spend money on a nice house for our family someday. 

liveforever
by Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 11:02 AM

I didnt have a big wedding. We wanted to buy a home more. Like you, I couldnt justify so much money for ONE day. We got married in a national park with 4 people. After that we had dinner in the private dining room of a nice local restaurant with close family and our best friends we have known since childhood...21 people total. It was an amazing day. ZERO stress!

I helped my best friend plan her big, expensive wedding. It was a lovely day but I wouldnt want to worry about all the things she did for over a year.

anotherandree
by Silver Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 11:08 AM

We got married in the courthouse with only our best friends present (we didn't live anywhere near our family then).  We had a fun party after with more people (still really small).  We had a mini honeymoon to London (we were living in England at the time), but then had an actual alone-time vacation for our 5 year anniversary.  

Sometimes I do wish I had a bigger, more traditional wedding but the truth is that WEDDINGS DON'T MAKE A MARRIAGE.  I think it is WONDERFUL that you guys are buying a house and already have 3 beautiful kids.  That is what really matters.  Yes, BEING married is huge, but GETTING married doesn't have to be. 

anotherandree
by Silver Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 11:09 AM

Very true!

Quoting nicole2884:

Big weddings are nice but i rather have a vacation alone

I do like the house surprise wedding that wouldn't be expensive

But weddings aren't about size its about the vows thats what makes it special

It seems like bad timing an a house builds a lifetime of memories thats way better than a wedding


SierraLynn
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 11:13 AM
Dh and I eloped in Maui while in R&R from Iraq. Im not into big weddings either, but I wish we would have had a small ceremony with close friends and family. We plan in trying to do something small to renew our vows on our 5th anniversary next year.
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Jwick
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 11:14 AM

We eloped.  Then 5 years later when things were calm and we had the money we had a vow renewal.  We never had a honeymoon but I'm planning a suprise trip to Vegas for our 10th anniversary.  Hubby has always wanted to go but never had the time and money to do it.

nsparky1964
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 11:16 AM
We got married on a sailboat with the Chicago skyline as our backdrop..then we had a huge party at our house...was perfect and not a lot of cash..
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kittyfaery
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 12:06 PM
We had a smallish wedding in Vegas. It was nice. About 35-40 of our friends and family came and it cost about 5000. We had two kids and had been together for 7 years because we didn't want to just run to the court house. Honestly, now I wish we had. Nothing changed between us afterwards, we had been living like we were married already.It feels weird to say we gave been married for 4 years when it seems like it has been so much longer.
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Krysden
by Platinum Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 1:00 PM

We had a small wedding in a small country church.  I planned it with a little help in 3 weeks and have never regretted it.  We called people the weekend before to let them know we were getting married, where, & what time.  Told them we'd love to see them there but if they couldn't make it that was fine too.  The way I see it, the wedding is just a detail.   The important thing is what happens AFTER the wedding.... THE MARRIAGE!    Good Luck regardless of what direction you go.  (=  

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