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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

trust?

Posted by on May. 8, 2013 at 4:00 PM
  • 57 Replies
How many of you really trust your men? And why?
Do you ever go through his phone or emails or anything like that?
When it comes to other females in his life what do you trust or not trust?
If trust is broken, what do you do?
by on May. 8, 2013 at 4:00 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Jwick
by on May. 8, 2013 at 4:48 PM
1 mom liked this

 

 

Quoting kyrstiemomma:

How many of you really trust your men? Yes.  And why?  He had never given me cause to not trust him before.
Do you ever go through his phone or emails or anything like that? No, he pretty much tells me everything.  We have a joint email and he asks me to check his social networking sites at least once a month.
When it comes to other females in his life what do you trust or not trust? I am not quite sure what you mean here.  If he has to be around another woman he tells me who, why and where.  If he is talking to them he usually tells me about it. 
If trust is broken, what do you do?  I am no help here.  Guess you have to deside if it is worth it to you to work through it.

 

 

sprinkles9112
by on May. 8, 2013 at 4:50 PM
1 mom liked this
My DH is the most honest man. I have never gone through his phone or emails.

The guy I was with before him was awful. He was abusive and a huge liar. I'm lucky I didn't catch anything with how often he slept around. Took me 6 years, but I left him.
Rosebud27aj
by on May. 8, 2013 at 4:51 PM
1 mom liked this

I trust my dh...he never gave me a reason not to. I don't go through emails or his phone, but we both can if we want, we just don't. Pretty much all the females in his life I know and they know me, so no problems there. If trust is broken, I'm not sure what I'd do, never been at that stage before. 

Krysden
by Platinum Member on May. 8, 2013 at 4:53 PM

Of course I trust him.   I can't explain the reason why... I just do because I know I can.  I do not go through his phone ro emails... I've never felt a need to do those things.  

pmsforlife
by Member on May. 8, 2013 at 4:54 PM
1 mom liked this
I go through everything, but it's a habit. There are NO girls in his.life and if he broke my trust.... He would die lol jk he doesn't every hide or lie.to me.
dearg76
by on May. 8, 2013 at 5:01 PM
1 mom liked this

I trust my husband - I have never gone through his stuff, I have played on his phone and seen texts but when he gets one from a girl at school (he is currently in school) he usually mentions something about the text or what she was wanting. 

My husband loves and respects me enough not to hide things from me.

EmilysMom2010
by Bronze Member on May. 8, 2013 at 5:21 PM
2 moms liked this
I don't have blind trust. My husband earned my trust through years and years of dating and living together. I learned he was a man I could trust with my heart. I don't do the "he hasn't given me a reason". So what. Tom, dick and Harry have never given me a reason not to trust them but I'm still not going to do it.
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kyrstiemomma
by on May. 8, 2013 at 5:42 PM
Well i will try to put this the shortest way i can.
Me and my husband have been married for about a year and 4 months.
I give trust til it is broken, but trust still needs to be earned. I was about 4 weeks pregnant when we got married.
I was never jealous before him.
Despite my jealousy i didnt care that he would text most of his female friends considering how most of his friends were females.
Everything went down hill for me after he never told me about his friends or what they talked about. I new nothing anout these girls! Then it started when i would go to my families house for a night. If he was working or couldnt come with me he would get mad and be so grumpy with me before left and when i was gone. So one day after coming back from my parents house i checked his phone to see who he called while i was gone. I had a gut feeling he called a girl. Which he did. But he did at least tell me to my face that he called her. I told him that i didnt like that he only called her when i wasnt home and when he wasn't okay cuz he was calling her to make him feel better. (Reguardless of whether he talked about us and our relationship or not he was still calling her to make him happy and cheer him up) so i simply told him how i felt.
Things got worse. I went through his phone more and more. He would complain to me. I saw messages where he would bitch about me. He once called me a stay at home bum to some chick because i was home pregnant and it was hard for me to get a job at the time! Not to mention we were both waking up at early and walking down to labor ready for 5:30am to try to get a job. Then i had my daughter when i was 25 weeks pregnant. Even after i had her id go down to labor ready with him and we'd wait til 9am to find a job and if we didnt get a job then we'd walk to the hopital to see our daughter. And if he got a job i would go see our daughter.
Id bring things up and he'd get mad and defensive but wouldnt see a problem with anything and he wouldnt like me doing certain things but it would be okay for him to do things. When our daughter was home he would leave to go to the library or hang out with friends. And he wouldnt even ask me it was okay half the time. Then he wouldnt text me or have a set amount of time to leave. And he wasn't even working.
And heaven forbid i wanted to get out! If i wanted to get out i had to take my daughter with me. The one time i did get out by myself i was only gone for two hours cuz he was bitching about our daughter. And it was my friends birthday party. I ended up finding messages on his meetme.com to girls. He would tell all of them they were so beautiful. Lie to them and say he was on base in the miltary. He even told some girls that he was married and didnt want to be with me and that it just wasnt the right time to get a divorce yet. He even met up with some chick! Then he had some girl over when we were 'getting some distance' cuz he got pissed that i kept going through his phone. I told him that if he had nothing to hide he wouldnt care even if it was annoying! Literally i would stop checking his phone then get a gut feeling, check it, and every time i would find something. I almost broke it off with him about a month and a half ago. Then he tells me he has split personality disorder. He also said i could check his medically records if i want. And i definitely will. I decided to stay with him and try to work things out. We've moving the end of this month and i am TERRIFIED. I keep thinking about how much more he could do behind my back there. If things dont get better im breaking it off. Ive been emotional hell since we've been married. Plus ive always been an insecure person. Add on pregnancy hormones (for pretty much a year straight!), lying, finding all those messages, having to walk to labor ready (15 mins from where i live) then 45 mins to the hospital and back every day to see my daughter while she was in the hospital for 2 and a half months, and getting pregnant with my second 2 weeks after i had my first daughter. Being in complete financial stress, motherly stress, marriage stress, plus the stress of not having my closest friends around to talk to.
Yea, at first he didn't give me anything not to trust, but he didn't really give me much to trust either. And this is what i've found out my relationship to truly be.
MomRocs1102
by on May. 8, 2013 at 5:44 PM
2 moms liked this

i did trust him, at one point.

kyrstiemomma
by on May. 8, 2013 at 5:44 PM
4 moms liked this
The way i see it is, you never know what someone is doing behind your back unless you watch your back..
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