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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

would u want ur so/husband to protect u

Posted by on May. 9, 2013 at 8:18 PM
  • 42 Replies

when it comes to his family,or friends?? if your hubbys kids are older,over 18,and they are not the wifes kids but  by another woman,and they disrespect the wife,should the hubby or bf stand up for his girl?should he sit back and say nothing because its his family?if his family is rude to the wife/gf and its bcause they r just rude and immature,what should he do? if his mother critisizes the wife/gf on how she cleans her house should the hubby tell her to mind her own house or just ignore th little comments his family makes?? how far does his family have to go to get th hubby to finally stand up and stick up for her? if he really loves her shouldnt the protectiveness come naturally? shouldnt he get defensive autmatically an stand up for her..or are some men just passive and it doesnt bother them? or does he really not love her and he will alway lethis fmily say what they want

by on May. 9, 2013 at 8:18 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ashli488
by Member on May. 9, 2013 at 8:20 PM
1 mom liked this

i would expect dh to stand up to them. i wouldnt want someone who lets their family walk all over me.

Mommabearbergh
by Bronze Member on May. 9, 2013 at 8:34 PM
When it comes to dh's mother it took for him to see what she was doing to understand why he needs to step in. We got into a argument where she said she would cut me in my face in front of my dd. I lost my mind and called her every swear word I know in English a few in patois. What stopped was my mom who had come to take me to my grandads house. My dh stood up for me after that. The cause of of the argument was her fault. He told her she was wrong. If its dh's brother I have a issue I will talk to him myself because I feel like we are two adults who can discuss a issue. If dh had kids outside oif our kids I would feel like he needs to address that
purplejbird
by on May. 9, 2013 at 8:39 PM

i had a mother in law who was horrible to me, i tried everything to be nice and find common ground. 

Once we walked into her home and she was using her kitchen aid mixer, I asked her about it and her response was "why you're not a cook" I was crushed, i COOKED 2-3 meals a day. my now ex-husband looked and me and shrugged his shoulders, but didn't stand up for me at all. I was crushed! (obviously, it was 9 years ago)

All I wanted was for him to stand up for me and protect me from his families cutting words!

BonitaM
by Ruby Member on May. 9, 2013 at 9:15 PM

Yes and no to wanting him protect me in these situations.  I don't want to cause conflict between DH and his family and I'm very capable of standing up for myself.  What I do expect is for him to support me.  I've thrown his mother out of our house twice and although he wasn't there, once I explained what happened he supported my doing so.  He didn't do it blindly and I respect him a lot for letting me take care of myself and being objective when he does back me up. 

MommyO2-6631
by on May. 9, 2013 at 9:22 PM
Yes. Absolutely. His number one priorities should be our marriage and our children. But i also respect my MIL and her relationship with her son. I would never say anything out of line. And she would never say anything out of line to me either. We are adults and act as such.
aeve234
by on May. 9, 2013 at 10:29 PM

thanks for the replies..i have many issues with some of his family and them disrespecting me and him not saying a damn thing to them.it being his family i feel he should b the one saying something to them instead of me.i back him up if my family says anything bad about him...i get so defensive about him but he does not when it comes to me..and it hurts.i also feel mine and his kids and our relationship should be numb.1 to him but feel selfish for feeling that because his other kids should b imprtant to him too but not when they r hateful to me.i ove him and do not want to leave him but if i keep feeling im not as important because i am not his blood...then what choice do i have??i want a man who will protect me no matter who is being hateful/rude to me.family or not.im tired of fighting this battle.

MomToovey
by Marianne on May. 9, 2013 at 11:18 PM

 I would expect him to have my back, but I wouldn't expect him to fight my battles for me. With me, perhaps, if I ask, but not for me.

3queens
by on May. 10, 2013 at 12:32 AM

I would love for my hubby to stand up for me with his wratched of a family for once, but I know that aint gonna happen. We are very low key if sombody does us something we do not speak up for ourselves at all!! We let everything ride and I hate hate that at times, but no he would not

suziejax
by on May. 10, 2013 at 12:49 AM

O yes!

earthangel1967
by YVONNE on May. 10, 2013 at 4:24 AM

 I couldn't be with someone who didn't make ME their priority as I make them.

I would never let someone badmouth my s/o and I deserve that same courtesy in return.

YVONNE

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