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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

that moment when your marriage becomes a country song.

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now granted it hasn't gotten that far yet and i hope it doesn't but for anyone who has heard the country song "I'm Gonna Miss Her" by Brad Paisley you know where this is going. dh has recently decided to start fishing again which is fine EXCEPT he goes every.freakin.day for 2-3 hours at a time and thats on the days he works. on the days he has off he's gone for 6-8 hours sometimes. this annoys me because we barely see him as it is, he leaves for work at 4:40am and doesn't come home until 4:30pm sat-thrus so that leaves us with 1 full day with him and like i said he spends half of THAT fishing too. he always says he misses us and wants to spend time with us but then comes home at 4:30 and immediately leaves to go fishing until 6:30-7 then he comes home eats dinner with us, helps with putting dd to bed then goes back to fishing until 9pm. so he spends a total of maybe an hour with dd from the time he gets home to the time she goes to bed and by the time he gets home the second time around 9 i'm an hour away from going to bed myself so we basically get 0 time together. i'm thankful he only fishes in the warm months but this is stupid. he doesn't keep the fish so it's not like we're reaping anything from it and not only that I WANT A BREAK TOO. now i won't go as far as the song i mentioned and tell him it's me or the fish but damn am i frustrated. does anyone else go through this with their SO either with fishing or another hobby?

CafeMom Tickers
by on Jun. 5, 2013 at 5:17 PM
Replies (11-18):
kalejames2010
by Annette on Jun. 6, 2013 at 10:19 AM
My dh's hobbies got so bad at one point that he had to take both kids with him because I never had any me time. Not even to take a shower. He learned real quick that being the only one with both little boys was not fun all the time.
MagicTemptation
by Christina on Jun. 6, 2013 at 5:02 PM

I am sorry sweetie. Ya'll need to find a balance. Why don't you and DD go fishing to somedays?

MagicTemptation
by Christina on Jun. 6, 2013 at 5:04 PM
I would love to live at the lake and come home for showers and sleep. I can cook there. lol :D But you are right, if it starts interferring with your marriage then hobbies need to slow down.
Quoting AnGLInterrupted:

It's good that he has a hobby.. but he seems obsessed.  When your marriage and other relationships are suffering, it's time to cool it for awhile.

My husband is a fisherman too.  If he thought he could get away with it, he'd live at the lake and come home for meals and sleep LOL.

ekh2010
by Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 5:14 PM

be glad its fish and not booze...talk to him bout it...good luck

catrig
by Bronze Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 6:32 PM
1 mom liked this

I kind of hate you.  Songs are now stuck in my head, and I may or may not have spent the past half hour on youtube.

Krysden
by Platinum Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 8:05 PM

Mine love to fish too... but how much he is out depends on a variety of other factors

MomToovey
by Marianne on Jun. 6, 2013 at 10:54 PM

 I am a football widow. When college football starts, I may as well be a single parent. The only upside to my situation is that at least he watches the games at home. And it's also a good situation because he usually works during the games, so they're all DVR'd and he can watch them after DD goes to bed, so at least he's not missing out on time with her. And I'll usually sit on the couch with him and read.

If I had to deal with what you're going through, I don't know how I would handle that. And unfortunately, I don't really know what to say that doesn't involve you making him spend less time fishing - a hobby I assume you've been aware of since before you got married? I guess all you can do is really do your best to make the time you do have together count.

Good luck. (((HUGS)))

ZoeysMom11
by Member on Jun. 7, 2013 at 12:43 PM
actually he never fished once through the entire 4 years of our relationship until now. he told me he liked it but he never started going until now. so unfortunately this is new for me which makes it harder :/

Quoting MomToovey:

 I am a football widow. When college football starts, I may as well be a single parent. The only upside to my situation is that at least he watches the games at home. And it's also a good situation because he usually works during the games, so they're all DVR'd and he can watch them after DD goes to bed, so at least he's not missing out on time with her. And I'll usually sit on the couch with him and read.


If I had to deal with what you're going through, I don't know how I would handle that. And unfortunately, I don't really know what to say that doesn't involve you making him spend less time fishing - a hobby I assume you've been aware of since before you got married? I guess all you can do is really do your best to make the time you do have together count.


Good luck. (((HUGS)))

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