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Im destroying my marriage!!...

Posted by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:14 AM
  • 14 Replies
So recently ive found out i may have borderline personality disorder and severe abandonment issues.(talked w/ therapist). Since ive gotten pregnant it has only triggered my fear of my husband leaving me, and in defense ive acted cold and tryed to.push him away to save myself from hurt, but in reality it hurts more if he tries to. We have been dealing with this pull and push method of loving, but know i think my husband cannot take it anymore and im afraid he is really going.
It has me severely depressed and emotional idk what to do, my biggest fear was being alone and pregnant now ive made it a self fulfilling prophecy. Need support . Please no bashing!
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:14 AM
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Replies (1-10):
lucky2Beeme
by Silver Member on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:23 AM

Get in to see a professional. They can help you deal with your issues and come to terms in a way that wont push your husband away. Maybe even go to marriage counseling together. That way he can understand whats going on. Hugs mama.

rvega2825
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:25 AM
Thanx, its constant battle...
prieta05
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:27 AM
Jessica?
TommyAbby
by Melissa on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:30 AM

Talk to your therapist and get on meds.. take your hubby with you to your therapist appts so you both can learn the skills to properly deal with what is going on. Good Luck girl!!! I am glad you can see what is going on and are trying to fix this :) 


rvega2825
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:30 AM
Lol im srry im not Jessica. :-\
98765
by Silver Member on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:33 AM

Ugh. Sorry. I've worked in mental health for 14 years and borderlines are the most difficult personality types to work with. There is no medication you can take to make it better. Get yoursef into GOOD cognitive and behavioral therapy. You may even need DBT daily. 

Good luck to you. And your husband. 

jmlmomma
by Bronze Member on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:35 AM

My sister has BPD (borderline personality disorder) ..You need to get the book "Stop Walking on eggshells" and "I hate you, Don't leave me"

IF you both are willing to learn about whats causing your reactions and learn how to handle your out bursts or control them...then it can work... but it's NOT easy and YOU have to be willing to learn and focus on not allowing the triggers to effect you... 

It's not hopeless....it will take work...

HUGS.... Good luck to all 3 of you...

rvega2825
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:36 AM
I just wish i had a support group so that im not so alone in this.
jmlmomma
by Bronze Member on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:38 AM

This is SO true...There are no meds that work for BPD and daily therapy maybe needed...

HUGS

Quoting 98765:

Ugh. Sorry. I've worked in mental health for 14 years and borderlines are the most difficult personality types to work with. There is no medication you can take to make it better. Get yoursef into GOOD cognitive and behavioral therapy. You may even need DBT daily. 

Good luck to you. And your husband. 


rvega2825
by on Jul. 2, 2013 at 7:38 AM
Thanx it alittle more reassuring to know its not the end that i can possibly learn to manage this disorder.


Quoting 98765:

Ugh. Sorry. I've worked in mental health for 14 years and borderlines are the most difficult personality types to work with. There is no medication you can take to make it better. Get yoursef into GOOD cognitive and behavioral therapy. You may even need DBT daily. 

Good luck to you. And your husband. 


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