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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Question without debate

Posted by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 9:52 AM
  • 37 Replies
1 mom liked this
Why is it that women want to have a baby with a man they aren't married to? This includes a fiancé. I just don't get that logic and am trying to understand why some don't want to wait until they get married.
by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 9:52 AM
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Replies (1-10):
lovemymini
by Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 9:53 AM
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I didn't, so here's a bump!

98765
by Silver Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 9:54 AM
1 mom liked this

I don't get it either

MommaTasha1003
by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:01 AM
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IDK.. Me & DH started dating at 15yo.... We got pregnant, unplanned, at 24yo & married at 26yo... Before marriage & before having a kid together we didnt see it as a big deal. We "didnt need a piece of paper"... It wasnt until we needed things jointed that it mattered, like insurance..... AFTER we said "I Do" we where like "OH this is what marriage feels like, maybe we should have done this sooner"... lol.

But for the woman who are PLANNING pregnancy before marriage, I dont understand either.

1stTimeMom1982
by Bronze Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:14 AM
I didn't either. To me it just makes sense to marry first and wait a few years before having kids to make sure you can tolerate each other lol
NDADanceMom
by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:16 AM
1 mom liked this
I had a very good friend that started dating a man 2 years into his messy divorce. The x drug it on and wanted unreasonable support. 3 years later they wanted to have a child as neither had kids. She was 41 already and the divorce was nowhere in site. They decided it was now or never.
Once the x found out a child was on the way she cut her losses as she knew with a child to support she would get much less.
furbabymum
by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:30 AM
2 moms liked this

 Sometimes I think women have kids hoping it'll keep the guy around. Not saying anyone in this group but I've read enough CM posts to know this is true.

HappyGirl77
by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:32 AM
5 moms liked this

Well, it is not that I didn't want to wait for marriage..it is just that our oldest ds didn't want to wait for us to get married!!  LOLsurprised

lillybug222
by Silver Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:34 AM
1 mom liked this
I don't get it either.

I do think some women think it'll fix issues or make their life more complete somehow.
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Anryan
by Platinum Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:50 AM
3 moms liked this

i would say that 50% of those babies that women have "outside of marriage" have OOPS written on thier forehead and the other 50% have "momma made me so daddy would stay" on thiers.  LMFAO

Actually, i think in this day and age marriage isn't seen as it was years ago.  It isn't necessary to have a piece of paper to know you are committed and love another person and want to have children with that person.  A marriage license doesn't stop someone from leaving a relationship, all it really helps with is legal issues like insurance and so on but still, with the way things are involved even that isn't needed anymore either as women can get thier own insurance and so beneficiaries on life insureance, etc don't have to be spouses anymore.

Anryan,

Wife to.....

  David    and   Irish

Amber5151
by Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 11:00 AM
2 moms liked this
My situation is similar to one listed above. My SO is in a nasty long, drawn out divorce. They were separated for a year before we started dating. We had been together for 2 years, living together for a year and decided since he was 40, it was now or never to have a child together since he wanted to be young enough to enjoy our child and be able to do things with him. So we planned and had a little boy. He is 18 months old now, we have been together for 4 years, and there still isn't an end in sight with his divorce. So no, my child isn't an "oops" or a "made to keep daddy" baby.
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