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Posted by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 12:51 PM
  • 33 Replies
13 moms liked this

If your husband is being a lazy ass, cheating, cussing at you, threatening you, belittling you or in general is just a crappy person that you wouldn't want your own daughter to date. You already know the answer on what you should do....

Seek counseling or get out. If he refuses counseling then he really isn't committed to trying to change or make things work out.  Right? 

If you are not married yet.... Talk to him before hand on big issues, children, money, division of chores, what is and is not allowed in your marriage (porn, friends of the opposite sex, drinking etc...) 

The same works for you as well. He is suppose to be your partner so making demands and treating him like a child will most likely only make him resent you and he will pull away. 

Yes. Life gets busy. Jobs,  responsibilities, children, school etc.... will take away a lot of your time together. You both have to make it a priority to remember that you are not just a mom, student, employee, but a wife/husband as well. Make your relationship a top priority. Even if you can only squeeze in 30 minutes a day to focus on each other do so. Don't spend that precious time complaining about how crappy your day was. Instead focus on each other and find comfort that you have each other.  Compliment each other often, small touches such as a hand on the arm while talking, random hugs, small gestures such a bringing him a drink or doing something small for each other. 

Don't expect your man to know what you are thinking. Most men do not respond or pick up on hints/clues. They need to be told straight out what you want or feel. Yes, it would be nice if they were intuitive but most men are not. If you know he is horrible at remembering special occasions, or sucks at planning a date night, do those things together that way you are not disappointed. 

Also  if you only come in here and make posts degrading your man and do not give us anything positive about him, of course we are going to have a negative opinion on him. Many women come in here to complain about their guy then get offended when we say he is a loser. Our opinions of your man is based soley on the information you provide. 

I think most of the time women already know the answer to what they should or shouldn't do. It is fear to actually act on upon it that leaves seeds of doubts.  We love talking to each other in here and giving advise to each other. Remember sometimes people in here will say something you don't want to hear. If you ask for advise or opinion please be prepared to hear many types of advice. Some you may not like.

Off my soapbox.

by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 12:51 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Brenda on Jul. 31, 2013 at 12:54 PM

Very well said and so perfect I have been married 27 years and I know how he works and he knows me too..

Great post

by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 2:10 PM
by Kendall on Jul. 31, 2013 at 2:41 PM
::claps:: THANK YOU!!
by Casey on Jul. 31, 2013 at 4:37 PM
2 moms liked this

How dare you come in here and speak logic and use reason! 

by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 5:18 PM

 When DH and I watch movies/TV or I tell him about something on here I often ask him what he'd think/do if this were us. If it would be ok. We are amazingly on the same page about most everything.

by Alexandra on Jul. 31, 2013 at 6:31 PM
1 mom liked this

Well said!

You should change the title to "public service announcement".

by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 7:56 PM

way to go goodyou rockclappinghigh five


by Melissa on Jul. 31, 2013 at 7:57 PM

And this is why we love you..

by Bella on Jul. 31, 2013 at 9:21 PM

 I agree

by Gold Member on Jul. 31, 2013 at 11:28 PM

I opened 9 posts this morning. Every single one of them was complaints listed above. It seems like the last few days has been nothing but an influx of trash talking a husband or "I have the worst man ever, but I love him, what do I do?" posts. I know women tend to bitch alot, but do they realize how they are portraying themselves in some of these posts? "He's cheated on me several times with different women, but he really does love me."  I know there is the excuse of taken your marriage vows seriously, and I agree you should but not just the "until death do us part" section. Is it okay for the other bit of "honoring and cherishing" to go out the window?

Quoting ReadWriteLuv:

How dare you come in here and speak logic and use reason! 

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