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Man & Woman best friends..but want more

Posted by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 4:32 PM
  • 5 Replies

Ok, please bare with me, this might be a little long winded, because I have to kinda start at the beginning, and dont want to leave much out. I am just desperate for some advice.

I met this guy on a dating site in Jube of 2012, turns out he lived on my street. We met, and clicked instantly. We were just getting to know eachother, we went out on a couple dates and hung out 4 times a week if not more. We slept together only a few times in a span of 2 months. I ended up by not talking to him anymore because I got back together with my ex...WORST IDEA EVER! I knew I made a big mistake. I couldnt stop getting this guy off my mind, and it drove me crazy. Well my ex ended up by cheating again so we broke up. Within a few days of my ex moving out...the guy contacted me. This was in December of 2012. SInce than, we have spoken everyday, all day, through text. Early morning late night. whatever. Well, over the last 9 months like I said we talked everyday, hung out 3-4 times a week, he has spent the last 2 weekends at my house. He has connected with my children. Everyone knows and says me and him should be together. Even his family. He met my family last weekend. He helps me around the house when I need a mans touch...mowing,,remodeling..whatver it may be... We are BEST FRIENDS.......told him at one point I was in love with him..maybe about 3 months ago. He blew it off and kinda changed the subject. I brought it up again about 1.5 months ago. And this time he did respond with " I dont want to be in a relationship with you"....And continued on with the fact I am his best friend.  Well me and him having the relationship we do....have continured to be best friends. Everything about him and I screams COUPLE. He comes over for movie nights and we cuddle. We talk about everything... Everyone of our friends thinks he just needs more time to see what he has right in front of him..... We both blow off other people that we could potentially date, for each other.

Should I keep waiting just to see if something comes of this? I cannot just be his friend...me n him cannot just be friends...There is always more to us. But he just doesn't want to commit to me...Am I wasting my time? Is he just scared? I know he does not use me for sex..or use me for anything. If he did, then thats all our relationship would consist of....

by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 4:32 PM
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Replies (1-5):
huntersmama711
by Bronze Member on Jul. 31, 2013 at 4:36 PM
1 mom liked this
Sounds like he's scared you'll just disappear again like the last time. Just give it some more time, don't bring up your feelings at all. You've got to prove yourself to him.
furbabymum
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 5:22 PM

 I wouldn't wait myself. I wouldn't want my kids getting attached to him in this situation. I'd tell him to declare his intentions. From there you'd have decisions to make.

I could not be this kind of friend though. I have male friends but we do not cuddle or have sex. That's not a friend imo.

godsgirl26
by Silver Member on Jul. 31, 2013 at 5:25 PM


Quoting huntersmama711:

Sounds like he's scared you'll just disappear again like the last time. Just give it some more time, don't bring up your feelings at all. You've got to prove yourself to him.


MagicTemptation
by Gold Member on Jul. 31, 2013 at 6:16 PM

I think the first two posters gave good advice. He may be afraid since you ditched him for your ex and he doesn't want that to happen again. Also, why should he committ if he is already getting everything? I know you said he isn't using you for sex. But if you are just friends. I wouldn't be sleeping with him and letting the kids get too attached to him. Don't blow off the other potential partners. If he isn't going to committ you may be missing out on some great guys.

earthangel1967
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 8:28 PM

 I agree with  this

Quoting MagicTemptation:

I think the first two posters gave good advice. He may be afraid since you ditched him for your ex and he doesn't want that to happen again. Also, why should he committ if he is already getting everything? I know you said he isn't using you for sex. But if you are just friends. I wouldn't be sleeping with him and letting the kids get too attached to him. Don't blow off the other potential partners. If he isn't going to committ you may be missing out on some great guys.

 

 YVONNE

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