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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

I need advice ASAP *update*

Posted by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:33 AM
  • 27 Replies
2 moms liked this
Tonight I discovered photos of a half naked woman on my husbands phone. I confronted him and he admitted to talking sexual with this woman and exchanging photos. He's sitting on the couch crying because I told him that tomorrow he was to leave and he's not welcomed back. He thinks I am being too harsh and that we should try to work through this. Normally I wouldn't just quit my marriage but this isn't the first time hes done this, I've forgiven him twice before. I told him I need time to think about this. We've done marriage counseling for this twice, the last time was 7 months ago. If you were in my situation what would you do?

Update:
He called last night to say he's sorry and that he thinks he has sex addiction. (our counsler suggested it before but he denied it) He says he wants to get help and swears that he was never been physical with these women. I stuck to my guns and said that it's great that he wants to finally work on himself but he can't do to it here around me and our son. It sucks because our son keeps asking for his daddy. He wanted for me to promise to still be there after he was done seeking help, but I told him I couldn't, I need to move forward with my life. I started college classes to finish my degree this fall, I've been working loosing weight (down 15lbs) and I've been to therapist for the last 6 months to make myself better (depression). I told him I'm not the same person I was the last two times and I wont settle anymore in this life. Thank you for your knid word and well wishing, I keep you updated,
by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:33 AM
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Replies (1-10):
polkaspots
by Bronze Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:36 AM
I would probably have already said what you're saying now. I wouldn't have given him three chances. I might have given him a second chance, but not more than that. I'm sorry you're going through this.
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akrall83
by Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:40 AM
I'm not in the best state of mind to give advice on these sorts of things, but i will send you virtual hugs. It's a crappy position to be in and I'm sorry your husband is a selfish prick.
pittymama
by Silver Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:44 AM

3 times? time to go.

NiCo86
by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:45 AM
2 moms liked this
third strike and you're out. he's apparently not committed to you and is untrustworthy. I'd be divorcing too
Abisha
by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:59 AM

It sounds like he's addicted to this sort of behavior. He needs to get help for himself. Stick to your guns, and stay separated until he does so.You deserve better than this.

Jewl-e
by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 2:37 AM
I agree with what you told him. I'd kick him out too. I know how addicting it can be but if he was truly devoted to you then he would stop. Trust, all it takes is self control. I wouldn't put up with it especially after him doing it twice before. Good luck and be strong
frzmamaof4
by Bronze Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:21 AM
Agreed! First time is forgiven, after that Oh Hell No!!!

Quoting NiCo86:

third strike and you're out. he's apparently not committed to you and is untrustworthy. I'd be divorcing too
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Gmgej
by Michele on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:45 AM

If it were me I honestly don't know what I woud do. My head says throw him out but my heart wouldn't be that easy to let him go. I am afraid if you stay with him this will never stop and chances are it will escalate into a physical affair at some time. I am sorry.

TommyAbby
by Melissa on Aug. 28, 2013 at 7:00 AM

I would send him on his way. 3 strikes and you are OUT. PERIOD. Stay strong.


createive
by Bronze Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 7:57 AM
Oh I'm sorry!

Not a good situation at all. I might move on too I wouldn't want a lifetime of that kind of activity.

Good luck.
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