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Have you ever been freaked out about your husband's fantasy?

Posted by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 9:17 AM
  • 17 Replies

Sex Confession: Wife Freaked Out About Husband's Fantasy

by Michele Zipp

thumbs down"Sex Confessions" is a series featuring your naughtiest bedroom secrets and fantasies. Some will sound familiar, others may give you ideas, some will turn you on, and some are dark and twisted. You might want to sit down for this.

Fantasies are fun to have but not always fun to act out. And some fantasies just should never be shared with others not even your wife or husband. When Chris* told his wife of 7 years Jamie* that his favorite fantasy is thinking of Jamie and her best friend Karen* getting frisky with each other it didn't go over very well. In fact, Jamie is now really freaked out and doesn't want to be in the same room with her best friend and husband for fear that things will get too weird for her wondering what's going on in her Chris's head. Tough one. I'll let Jamie explain the situation.

About two months ago Chris and I were out to dinner and having a great time and a few drinks when we started talking about sex. We do this a lot -- we have a great sex life and 3 kids to prove it. But what happened differently this time is he told me that he sometimes fantasizes about me and my best friend Karen having sex. WHAT IS THAT ABOUT????

I'm no prude or at least I didn't think so but I don't want my husband thinking about my best friends doing naughty things to me. I don't want him thinking about my best friend naked and me doing sexy things to her. It creeps me out. So I told him. And it didn't go over well because he was weirded out that I was weirded out and then we were both weird to each other and haven't had sex since.

Now this is odd for us -- we have sex quite often, probably about three or four times a week. And now we're both afraid to try sexy time stuff with the other one becasue of the huge best friend fantasy elephant in the room. And I don't want to have Karen over because I'm just freaked out about the whole darn thing and fear I will act weird or I'll think Chris is acting weird and so everything is just a bit wonky right now because of this fantasy I wish my husband didn't tell me about.

He feels awful and wishes he didn't tell me either. He's assured me it's no big thing and that I should just forget it but I can't.

What do you think Jamie should do? Should she just forget it and not make a big deal about it?


*Names have been changed.

by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 9:17 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 10:53 AM

Men will go as far as you let them. No and find out if he is find best friend attractive. All men will cheat if give ok. Think and sometimes answers will break your heart.

by Brenda on Sep. 8, 2013 at 12:14 PM

Yes she should just do what she always has done chat w/her friend etc and have her over tell her hubby to get over it that it will NOT ever happen.. Be a woman and just say it...

I am not sure how women today can deal w/me like this most women say OK and go on.. This has to stop!

by Ruby Member on Sep. 8, 2013 at 12:27 PM
1 mom liked this

Nothing my DH has ever said has freaked me out.  I may have freaked him out a little but we're pretty open about our fantasies.  I think Jamie should just forget about it and not make a big deal about it.  It's just a fantasy doesn't have to be a reality.

by Trica on Sep. 8, 2013 at 12:41 PM
Its a fantasy, not real! He didn't even say he wanted her friend! She should not get creeped out about it. But its hard to say even in "fantasy" what bothers people&what doesn't?
DH has never scared me, I think I have scared him? LOL We are comfortable in our bedroom! ;-)
by Emily on Sep. 8, 2013 at 4:23 PM
No I'm pretty well used to my dh's weirdness.
by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 4:30 PM

I am a very open-minded, adventurous person but I cant see myself ever been cool with either of us doing anything with another person. I wouldn't make a big deal about it though, I'm sure a lot of men fantasize about things like that... I would just tell him thanks for telling me and to think of another fantasy that we could recreate. lol

by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 4:41 PM

My best friend is a total hottie and bisexual, so I've always assumed my husband was thinking dirty things when we're all together. It really doesn't bother me,,,,she's my best friend and would never do anything like hook up w/ him behind my back. I would say to try and change your mindset about the situation, but I'm not sure how that would work LOL

by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 6:51 PM

 Todd and I share and at least role play our fantasies, we are very similar sexually so nothing either of us has shared has freaked the other one out, we also feel secure because we also seem to share the same boundaries and "no way" zones such as involving outsiders in our sex life. Our styles, fetishes, turn ons etc blend perfectly together.


by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 7:15 PM

Guys have fantasies.  It doesn't mean they are going to act on them, or make you act on them.  A lot of guys dream of girl on girl action.  I would tell hubby it's never going to happen and leave it at that.  I would find out if he's attracted to my friend.  I wouldn't want my husband screwing my friend either. 

by on Sep. 8, 2013 at 8:59 PM

My husband won't tell me about his fantasies....well, rarely anyway.  Took me 3 months to get to him even admitting he has the hots for Jenn Aniston and Angelina Jolie, let alone anything else.

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