would you "mourn" him? I was married to my first DH for 8 years. He lied and hurt me most of our marriage, and finally cheated on me while we were both in Afghanistan. That was the final straw, and we separated in the fall of 2012. I met someone that winter and re-married, and he's since had two girlfriends. I wanted shared custody of our 7 y/o DS and he fought me, lying in court to make me out to look like a bad mother and capitalizing on the fact that I had a job and he didn't. He was given majority custody and yes I'll admit I was angry about that. We only spoke about our son after that, by text or email. We rarely spoke to one another. Last month I was at work and I got a call from the police department telling me that my ex had passed away in his sleep, and that I needed to come pick up our DS. I was shocked, seeing as how I'd just seen him the night before when I dropped off DS, and seeing as how he was healthy and only 29 (they still don't know what happened to him). In any case, I was very heartbroken for our son, but OUR relationship had been long over, and I admit I was more concerned with what I was going to do with DS while I worked than I was with my ex actually being dead. I did help my ex-MIL when she flew out here to arrange his funeral and clean out his apartment. I let my DS go with her and my ex's g/f for his service down in AZ and everything...I've been very kind to them. However, I don't feell ike I need to "grieve". I saw a co-worker for the first time since his passing on Friday, and he offered his condolences. I laughingly said, "Well, at least I don't have to pay child support anymore" and he looked at me like I was a monster. Then he said snidely, "Well, I guess everyone grieves differently," and walked away. Granted the joke was in poor taste, but in all honesty, how much is an EX spouse supposed to GRIEVE? How would you feel if your ex, who purposely kept your child from you and made you miserable you whole marriage, passed away? Would you "grieve"?