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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Does anyone else's DH have PTSD or suffer from a TBI??

Posted by on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:23 PM
  • 21 Replies

My DH has both from combat in Iraq and I'm trying to learn as much as I can about these two inuries.  I'm a Soldier too but I don't suffer from either.  Any informations is helpful, thank you. 

by on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:23 PM
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Replies (1-10):
LaughCryLive
by Bronze Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:24 PM
I was diagnosed with PTSD 5 years ago. It's not combat related. Can't really help. I went to therapy and took meds and now I'm mostly ok.
MrsApple
by Silver Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:25 PM

My husband doesn't but my brother suffers from both (also from service and injury in Iraq).

ColoradoMom86
by Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:30 PM

I guess I am just trying to determine how much it affects his day to day behavior so when we're arguing and he says or does certain things, I can know that that is why he's doing it, or if it has nothing to do with it.  He has told me before that when we're arguing he can't think logically and that it's from his TBI.  He is also incredibly defensive, but most of all, he gets bitterly angry if I mention his PTSD to anyone.  I was talking to my sister in law online about an argument we were having and SHE said that being irrational was a part of his TBI.  He read it and is now mortally offended thinking that we see him as a mental patient :/  I don't know why he can't accept that he has these things and stop seeing them as something to be ashamed of.  It kills me. He earned his injuries and his trauma is from fighting bravely, it's nothing to be ashamed of. 

Quoting MrsApple:

My husband doesn't but my brother suffers from both (also from service and injury in Iraq).


LaughCryLive
by Bronze Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:32 PM
You can't help someone who doesn't want to get help. Sometimes they enjoy using the excuse.

Quoting ColoradoMom86:

I guess I am just trying to determine how much it affects his day to day behavior so when we're arguing and he says or does certain things, I can know that that is why he's doing it, or if it has nothing to do with it.  He has told me before that when we're arguing he can't think logically and that it's from his TBI.  He is also incredibly defensive, but most of all, he gets bitterly angry if I mention his PTSD to anyone.  I was talking to my sister in law online about an argument we were having and SHE said that being irrational was a part of his TBI.  He read it and is now mortally offended thinking that we see him as a mental patient :/  I don't know why he can't accept that he has these things and stop seeing them as something to be ashamed of.  It kills me. He earned his injuries and his trauma is from fighting bravely, it's nothing to be ashamed of. 

Quoting MrsApple:

My husband doesn't but my brother suffers from both (also from service and injury in Iraq).

MrsApple
by Silver Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:35 PM

Before...my brother was a laid by guy,never quick to anger,always pretty mellow.Now,he can go from happy to angry in .2 seconds with NO reason at all.He will just suddenly snap at you and then will be full of rage.And he will freely admit afterwards that he knows,in the moment,that he is being irrational but he CAN NOT control it.He hates himself for his behavior but there's nothing he can do except walk away and stay away from others until he calms down.It took us all awhile but we finally realized that we couldn't take any of it personally and when he got into this moods,to just let him walk away.

Is he seeking/getting any treatment for it at all?If not,that's a big issue.He really needs to see someone.My brother has been getting help and it's helped but of course he stills suffers physical issues and pain from it all which seems to slow down and recovery he's making.But he's trying.


Quoting ColoradoMom86:

I guess I am just trying to determine how much it affects his day to day behavior so when we're arguing and he says or does certain things, I can know that that is why he's doing it, or if it has nothing to do with it.  He has told me before that when we're arguing he can't think logically and that it's from his TBI.  He is also incredibly defensive, but most of all, he gets bitterly angry if I mention his PTSD to anyone.  I was talking to my sister in law online about an argument we were having and SHE said that being irrational was a part of his TBI.  He read it and is now mortally offended thinking that we see him as a mental patient :/  I don't know why he can't accept that he has these things and stop seeing them as something to be ashamed of.  It kills me. He earned his injuries and his trauma is from fighting bravely, it's nothing to be ashamed of. 

Quoting MrsApple:

My husband doesn't but my brother suffers from both (also from service and injury in Iraq).



ColoradoMom86
by Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:40 PM

We found out I was expecting our first son together last year in the Spring and he decided to go get help.  He told his command he had never received treatment for his PTSD but that he knew he had it.  He used to get those episodes too before we were together where he'd leave if we were out in public and go back to his room and wouldn't answer the door.  So it sounds similar to what your brother does, just shuts himself away.  Now that we're married he doesn't have as many episodes, but if we're fighting about something, he can go into one very easily.  He is now being separated from the Army for the PTSD.  They gave him some medication but he doesn't take it.  I think he was going to a group therapy type thing, but he isn't anymore.  When I ask about therapy, he gets offended.  But from what I've seen, PTSD affects everyone differently and everyone's is triggered by different things, so one on one therapy is really the only way to determine the best way to cope.  He is moving here next week and when he gets here I'm going to push the therapy idea. 

Quoting MrsApple:

Before...my brother was a laid by guy,never quick to anger,always pretty mellow.Now,he can go from happy to angry in .2 seconds with NO reason at all.He will just suddenly snap at you and then will be full of rage.And he will freely admit afterwards that he knows,in the moment,that he is being irrational but he CAN NOT control it.He hates himself for his behavior but there's nothing he can do except walk away and stay away from others until he calms down.It took us all awhile but we finally realized that we couldn't take any of it personally and when he got into this moods,to just let him walk away.

Is he seeking/getting any treatment for it at all?If not,that's a big issue.He really needs to see someone.My brother has been getting help and it's helped but of course he stills suffers physical issues and pain from it all which seems to slow down and recovery he's making.But he's trying.

MrsApple
by Silver Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 9:44 PM

If he's not taking the meds and not going to therapy,you should get in contact with his command before he leaves there.Seriously.Make sure they know.

My brother was medically retired from the military because of it as well.

Quoting ColoradoMom86:

We found out I was expecting our first son together last year in the Spring and he decided to go get help.  He told his command he had never received treatment for his PTSD but that he knew he had it.  He used to get those episodes too before we were together where he'd leave if we were out in public and go back to his room and wouldn't answer the door.  So it sounds similar to what your brother does, just shuts himself away.  Now that we're married he doesn't have as many episodes, but if we're fighting about something, he can go into one very easily.  He is now being separated from the Army for the PTSD.  They gave him some medication but he doesn't take it.  I think he was going to a group therapy type thing, but he isn't anymore.  When I ask about therapy, he gets offended.  But from what I've seen, PTSD affects everyone differently and everyone's is triggered by different things, so one on one therapy is really the only way to determine the best way to cope.  He is moving here next week and when he gets here I'm going to push the therapy idea. 

Quoting MrsApple:

Before...my brother was a laid by guy,never quick to anger,always pretty mellow.Now,he can go from happy to angry in .2 seconds with NO reason at all.He will just suddenly snap at you and then will be full of rage.And he will freely admit afterwards that he knows,in the moment,that he is being irrational but he CAN NOT control it.He hates himself for his behavior but there's nothing he can do except walk away and stay away from others until he calms down.It took us all awhile but we finally realized that we couldn't take any of it personally and when he got into this moods,to just let him walk away.

Is he seeking/getting any treatment for it at all?If not,that's a big issue.He really needs to see someone.My brother has been getting help and it's helped but of course he stills suffers physical issues and pain from it all which seems to slow down and recovery he's making.But he's trying.


ReadWriteLuv
by Casey on Apr. 27, 2014 at 8:30 AM

My husband came back from Afghanistan the first time with PTSD, and came back worse the second time. I can't really describe his behavior in any other word than strange. The oddest things would set him off. Several years later it's better, but he's always had a hair trigger and at 38 years old it's no better. I think he eats his feelings though, honestly, and he's always had a problem with alcohol. He says he needs it to cope. It's not that he just likes it, he says he needs it and can't relax without it.

Good luck.  

booaura
by Bronze Member on Apr. 27, 2014 at 8:31 AM
My husband doesn't, but I have PTSD. Not from combat though.
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Reetz609
by on Apr. 27, 2014 at 3:28 PM

My Dh sufferes from Ptsd from Afgahnistan, when he came back they didn't give him no counsling they just put him right back out there. I'm not a solider myself, so when he starts talking about it I just sit and listen to him. Sometimes just being there for them and listining to them helps. He use to see a va counslor, once in awhile if it got to much for him. 

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