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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

I recently left my fiance/boyfriend. I posted something about it earlier and received some great advice that helped me realize a lot and thank you to those who posted. So now I am in the dilema of fear. I have my three little ones to care for and look after. I asked him if he would consider moving out and leaving me the trailer where we live so that I could keep my kids were their entire life is (school, friends, family). He said I was welcome to stay how ever long I needed but that he had no where to go and he was not leaving. He has so many frined who are single who I know would not mind but I truly think this trailer which is old means too much for him to let go. it is under his name and he did pay it off alone while I took care of house hold nececitities and bills. plus the kids needs as well, food, clothes, shoes, school supplies anything, His sole responsability in the home was rent. He did not help me financialy. I left and it hurt I mean sometimes you love someone even though they treat you badly and its hard to walk away. I thought of my kids and how unhappy we just were. I thought that at least for his daughter he would have some compasion but he doesn't.  I just would like to know if anyone has been through something like this or knows a little bit. Can I do anything to keep the home even though its under his name? I am currently looking around but with three kids and no help is hard. And, expensive. Thanks  

by on May. 16, 2014 at 5:38 PM
Replies (11-18):
Krysden
by Platinum Member on May. 19, 2014 at 12:09 AM

I just wanted to wish you luck. 

LadyBast
by Brenda on May. 19, 2014 at 10:52 AM

No help I would see if the state you live in has help b/c of the kids! Good luck!

ebmars2681
by Member on May. 19, 2014 at 2:32 PM

seems like you helped him more than he helped you.  Do you  have any family members that you can stay with until you get on your feet?  i know you do not want to uproot your children and the thought of it is very scary.  But which miserable would you rather be in?  uprooting you and your children or staying with him?

DakotaHaley
by Member on May. 19, 2014 at 2:38 PM

Yeah, I have been in that situation. I don't think there is anyway you can keep the trailer and he leaves. You guys aren't married or renting so it's his.

  In my case I was married. He didn't want to leave the house and I ended up leaving and moving my kids, cause I didn't want the fight. 

   The only thing my kids were worried about was toys other then that they were okay. It's tough for kids no matter what and all I can say is just try to make it as easy as you can for them. Hopefully he will too.

   I wouldn't stress to much about having to move. It will all work out. 

UCFknight
by Silver Member on May. 19, 2014 at 3:12 PM

Do you have relatives you can stay with for awhile? Like others have said, you can apply for housing, and assistance. Go to the courts and file for CS if he is the father for any of the kids. Not sure what state you are in,be but when my sister needed help. She applied for some daycare grants through our local women's center in central fl, so she could work and not be spending all her income on paying for childcare. Good luck to you. I hope you are able to  go yet help soon, and get out of there.

4HMomto3
by on May. 19, 2014 at 3:58 PM

You were not married, so no you are not going to be able to keep the trailer. I would contact the county to see if you qualify for special housing, assistance, anything . 

Also , I wish you luck. It will be hard at first but it will get better. 

chaotic.mind
by Member on May. 19, 2014 at 4:30 PM

Unfortunately, since it is in his name there isn't anything you can do about it. I would just stay there until I could find somewhere else to go. Apply for housing and assistance. Good luck.

24clark
by Member on May. 19, 2014 at 7:10 PM

Sorry I do not htink there is anything you can do to stay in this home. It is in his name. You can however try to get child support moving forward for your girls which should help you out. But that is down the road. Ask community groups such as Social Services & Church if there are programs to help you out while you are trying to get on your feet. (Don't forget to pay them back in a few years. Donate goods or time to help others out.)

What I do know from experience is this...You will figure it out however hard it is. You will be a better person for this struggle. Take this opportunity to learn and try teach your children how to avoid this type of hardship by example and don't repeat the mistake. You should stay away from men until you figure out why you selected someone that was not healthy for you. 

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