Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Do you think I'm over reacting, Okay so me and My husband has this thing about not being on facebook. Which he ain't suppose to get on it ether. Anyway so today I Got up to get on the computer and Facebook was on. So i thought it was his friend on . But come to see that it was him on . And that he's been getting on. Now if that was me and he saw that i have been getting on he would get all mad and everything. Start fighting with me about it. So instead of getting mad i asked him about it he tried to lie at first. But then Said yes he did only that one day but then come to see once he left i checked it and he gets on more then he says. Is this something i should be mad about? Or should i just let it go....

I'm kinda hurt that he would lie to me, He said he changed and everything that he ain't the way he use to be. But i guess i still have a little trust issue there. I mean he don't like me on it so why should he be able to get on it. . . Not sure how to react to this, When he gets home Should i ask him again and see what he says or what do i do...


by on May. 17, 2014 at 3:58 PM
Replies (21-29):
NativeMommy14
by Member on May. 18, 2014 at 5:41 PM

Like i said before yes fackbook did cause alot of drama between Me and him. Back in 2012 He cheated on me With his Ex while my mother was passing away in the hospital. Anyway But he was talking to her on facebook before that too. And yes I'm getting help I've been working on trusting him more. And yes i've told him that I need time to build that trust back up with him...

Quoting MomToovey:

 It sounds like there's more to this story than we're being told. Am I right? You don't have to share with us anything you don't want to share, that's not what I'm saying. I'm merely stating that it sounds like facebook is just one facet of the real problem.

That said, you mentioned you're having trouble trusting him. Again, because it sounds like there's more to the story, I assume he's actually given you a reason not to trust him? And if that's the case, you can't have a relationship without trust. If he has done something to break your trust, you need to be honest with him, that even if you've forgiven him (have you?) you're still healing. And it's going to take time for that trust to build back up. If he wants you to trust him again, he's going to need to play by all the rules, and that means no facebook - or anything else you may have agreed on.

If I'm wrong, and he HASN'T done anything to break your trust, it's still true that you can't have a relationship without it, but this time, instead of coming to him and having him help you build up that trust, it's an issue of your own that you need to work on. Maybe seek counseling to figure out how to deal with whatever is making you feel insecure? And have a discussion with him that you know he hasn't done anything wrong and you're working on your issues in order to be more trusting.



miss-karla
by Member on May. 18, 2014 at 5:46 PM
U should go on facebook too
bmw29
by Bronze Member on May. 18, 2014 at 5:51 PM
I wouldn't be with someone that was that controlling nor would I be with someone I couldn't trust.
NativeMommy14
by Member on May. 18, 2014 at 5:53 PM

Naw! That's the different's between me and him. I'm actually faithful. i don't see the Point of facebook. i'm trying this new thing out since i've been going to church and all. And that is Trying not to lie or anything and To being Faithful... Which time's get hard when I'm trying not to get mad at him over certain things but all i can do is bit my lip and walk away..

Quoting miss-karla: U should go on facebook too



miss-karla
by Member on May. 18, 2014 at 5:55 PM
Well just have a talk to him about it and see what he says. :)

Quoting NativeMommy14:

Naw! That's the different's between me and him. I'm actually faithful. i don't see the Point of facebook. i'm trying this new thing out since i've been going to church and all. And that is Trying not to lie or anything and To being Faithful... Which time's get hard when I'm trying not to get mad at him over certain things but all i can do is bit my lip and walk away..

Quoting miss-karla: U should go on facebook too

3xangel
by Bronze Member on May. 18, 2014 at 5:57 PM
This

Quoting areid1023: He's lying to you. It's a big deal and you have every right to be angry. I don't know what you should do about it but I'd be interested in what he's doing on there that's worth sneaking and lying about. Red flag. huge red flag. Good luck.
kjacobs91
by New Member on May. 18, 2014 at 6:10 PM

Regardless of how anyone feels about social media in general. 

You made a deal. He broke the deal; and then tried to lie about it. I definitely think if it's worth lying about, it's worth snooping, or at least poking and prodding to get an answer out of. I think it's completely justiable to be angry, especially since you made a deal and he broke it.  

NativeMommy14
by Member on May. 18, 2014 at 6:13 PM

I did talk to him last night about it. And he told me everything and he let me look at it And i've checked it today too. And It's still the same. He hasn't been on computer i told him I'll be checking it everyday and That he better keep his password the same and he said he don't have anything to hind that What happend in the past he was still trying to grow up. And now He realizes that He wants to be with his family that he loves his kids with me and that he love's me that you would never do anything to break us up again. And i told him That If i ever catch him or see anything. That that would be the end of it and i would file for Devorce.Which then i felt bad cause he kinda got tears in his eyes and said You and My girls are the only thing that has ever been there for me...

Quoting miss-karla: Well just have a talk to him about it and see what he says. :)
Quoting NativeMommy14:

Naw! That's the different's between me and him. I'm actually faithful. i don't see the Point of facebook. i'm trying this new thing out since i've been going to church and all. And that is Trying not to lie or anything and To being Faithful... Which time's get hard when I'm trying not to get mad at him over certain things but all i can do is bit my lip and walk away..

Quoting miss-karla: U should go on facebook too



miss-karla
by Member on May. 19, 2014 at 12:36 AM
Yeah sounds like he wasn't trying to hurt you on purpose

Quoting NativeMommy14:

I did talk to him last night about it. And he told me everything and he let me look at it And i've checked it today too. And It's still the same. He hasn't been on computer i told him I'll be checking it everyday and That he better keep his password the same and he said he don't have anything to hind that What happend in the past he was still trying to grow up. And now He realizes that He wants to be with his family that he loves his kids with me and that he love's me that you would never do anything to break us up again. And i told him That If i ever catch him or see anything. That that would be the end of it and i would file for Devorce.Which then i felt bad cause he kinda got tears in his eyes and said You and My girls are the only thing that has ever been there for me...

Quoting miss-karla: Well just have a talk to him about it and see what he says. :)

Quoting NativeMommy14:

Naw! That's the different's between me and him. I'm actually faithful. i don't see the Point of facebook. i'm trying this new thing out since i've been going to church and all. And that is Trying not to lie or anything and To being Faithful... Which time's get hard when I'm trying not to get mad at him over certain things but all i can do is bit my lip and walk away..

Quoting miss-karla: U should go on facebook too

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)