For those who prefer not to get bogged down in the details, just read the bold LOL
Over five years later, I am starting to regret not having a formal wedding. At the time, my husband and I were young and focused on building our future. Spending our life together was no question; it just had to be. The manner in which we began, however, was debated for a bit before just giving in and heading to the courthouse.
For the most part, I think it was a wise financial investment to go the route we did. We have an extensive financial portfolio, retirement funds, and savings; we are homeowners; we have our careers....yada yada yada. But I regret not having everything else that comes from walking down the aisle and being given away; my mother assuredly won't let me forget that her oldest child took that away from her.
People have been joking that we have 13 years under our belt and if we blew the money on a wedding, we probably would not have lasted. I do think it ironic how some of the most beautiful weddings I have been to end in early divorces. It could be that many are focused on the materialism and the show of it all, when all we wanted was each other. I'm sure everyone can see how we pour our hearts into each other everyday (and I'm often told it's sickening how much we like each other still). It's a little game to us to strive to make each other blush daily with some gesture of love, and sometimes it just happens to be in public. I know him knowing that I love and cherish him is what is most important, and that an actual wedding does not matter.
I realize that we could always do a vow renewal with all
the bells and whistles, but that still won't be the same. Perhaps I will
climb to the highest elevation with a REALLY loud blow horn and shout
my vows, and that would take care of all this nonsense.
For all the ladies that did have a wedding or are planning a wedding, what do you see as the pro and cons? If you went the route we did, what do you see as the pros and cons?