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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

Divorce Edited to make it a little more clear on what I meant by my options.

Posted by on Jul. 20, 2014 at 12:16 PM
  • 74 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Where do you stand on divorce?

Options:

divorce is never an option (Nothing can or will ever separate us except death)

"I know where the door is so you better treat me right" (things will never get better to extreme situations)

Divorce is always an option (look at me sideways and I'm gone)

other: please explain


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 116

View Results

What is your stance on divorce?

by on Jul. 20, 2014 at 12:16 PM
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Replies (1-10):
juniors.mommy
by Member on Jul. 20, 2014 at 12:18 PM
4 moms liked this
Its nwver an option..unless of course theres any type of abusive to me or our children...or cheating
other than that anything else can be worked out
LuvMyBoys09
by Member on Jul. 20, 2014 at 12:31 PM
3 moms liked this
Well, with my ex husband, he treated me like garbage for basically the entire time we were together and I stuck it out because he would tell me that I'd be nothing without him, that I'd fail at life etc etc.

So, because of all of that, I had no love for him and it took him cheating on me, for me to realize that.
What I thought were feelings of love, were just feelings of being trapped and scared of being alone.
But I was shocked at how easily I said "I want a divorce." until I analyzed everything and realized I deserved better.

Now, I'm in a healthy relationship, where I value him, he values me and there's actual love there, so if there were infidelity on his part, I'd probably be less likely to walk away, especially once we're married.
Now, obviously, you just don't know how you'd handle certain things, until you find yourself in that situation but this is speaking from my feelings right now.

I think the only deal breaker, no matter how much I love him, is abuse....There's no tolerance for that, at all.
I'd hit the road in a heart beat.
kgbm13
by on Jul. 20, 2014 at 12:35 PM

I walked away after 13 yrs of control and emotional abuse as well as several affairs on his part.  I researched divorce in my state and found I could get what I needed in order to live.  He believed even through the d day he had control of me and I wouldn't go through it.  Wasn't until after the divorce he realized I took back control of my life.  Now 20 months later the jerk is trying to again control my life.

BonitaM
by Ruby Member on Jul. 20, 2014 at 12:40 PM

I'm glad you got out.  I hope he doesn't succeed. *hugs*

Quoting kgbm13:

I walked away after 13 yrs of control and emotional abuse as well as several affairs on his part.  I researched divorce in my state and found I could get what I needed in order to live.  He believed even through the d day he had control of me and I wouldn't go through it.  Wasn't until after the divorce he realized I took back control of my life.  Now 20 months later the jerk is trying to again control my life.


kgbm13
by on Jul. 20, 2014 at 1:13 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm glad I did as well. I've been in a relationship with an amazing man for over a year.  I've moved forward.  As for succeeding I'm not asking for much to be dealt with and his lawyers co attorney even suggest what I want.  But knowing my x he isn't going to go with it.  

Quoting BonitaM:

I'm glad you got out.  I hope he doesn't succeed. *hugs*

Quoting kgbm13:

I walked away after 13 yrs of control and emotional abuse as well as several affairs on his part.  I researched divorce in my state and found I could get what I needed in order to live.  He believed even through the d day he had control of me and I wouldn't go through it.  Wasn't until after the divorce he realized I took back control of my life.  Now 20 months later the jerk is trying to again control my life.



faire_jour
by on Jul. 20, 2014 at 1:54 PM
1 mom liked this

Divorce is a last ditch effort to keep you and your children safe from an abuser who refuses to get help.

brittany208
by on Jul. 20, 2014 at 3:19 PM

I said other. Divorce is not an option for me. period. But in cases of abuse, then yes.

froggyfreak330
by on Jul. 20, 2014 at 3:47 PM
1 mom liked this

 I chose "its always an option." No one should be forced to stay in a marriage and be miserable. Sometimes relationships dont work, and sometimes its not realized till after marriage. Its just the way things are. While I think some people could work harder to make their marraiges work, its up to them as to whether they care enough about their spouse and relationship to try that hard. Really, For me, the only way I would leave my marriage is if my husband started beating me or something, but I know he would never do anything like that. Yet, I know divorce is an option if things did go south for whatever reason. I see divorce the same way I see abortion - none of my business.

MMerrill
by Melissa on Jul. 20, 2014 at 4:15 PM
4 moms liked this

I voted that divorce is never an option, but maybe I should have voted other.

If there was ever any kind of continuous abuse or cheating I would get divorced.  Everything else can be worked out.  (By continuous, I mean he would have to be repeatedly abusing me or cheating on me without any signs of getting help/stopping)

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Serenity7
by Platinum Member on Jul. 20, 2014 at 4:30 PM
1 mom liked this

 Depends on the situation

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