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His untapped potential?

Posted by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 9:37 AM
  • 13 Replies

Women are often faced with the choice of being with someone based on their potential, whether that be how he may treat her, what kind of father he might be, what kind of husband he might be, what kind of career he might have. For those of us who met our current DH/SO when they were younger, we often have to predict what their future might behold. Perhaps he was fresh out of high school or just entering the military. Perhaps he was in college or had no job at all.

When you met your DH/SO, did you see his potential? Did he meet, exceed, or fall below your expectations?


by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 9:37 AM
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Replies (1-10):
BonitaM
by Ruby Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 10:00 AM
I was never one to think about the future by I admit the determining factors when I married DH were that he would age well and I'd receive great sex forever.
He has exceeded those expectations and even ones I didn't have. He's a very strong man who is also compassionate and understanding. He's a wonderful husband and father and works very hard. I'm very proud to call him mine.
alexsmomaubrys2
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 10:05 AM
I knew that he was capable of anything he put his mind to and would always work hard to take care of me and our future children. He has surpassed my expectations and then some!

I am a very lucky woman.

We married when we were 21 and he was entering the Navy.
furbabymum
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 10:14 AM

 At 18 I can't say I gave it that much thought. It was an emotional investment.

Fayanne
by Platinum Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 10:15 AM

 when I was first married (now divorced) I saw his potential. My mother, however, came right out and said "He'll never amount to anything".

he did end up doing fairly well.. set up his own business (part of the reason the divorce was so nasty), but it certainly wasn't all easy at the time.... and, I daresay, he wouldn't have made it that far without me.

LadyBast
by Brenda on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:20 PM

I did not think of the future back then it was one day at a time.. I am glad also that I did this, meaning I never expect more and that is a good thing!

M4LG5
by Silver Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:23 PM
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 One thing I learned from my therapist after being with my ex....never fall in love with someone's potential.  Not everyone meets their potential. 

M4LG5
by Silver Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:25 PM

 Now....though I didn't think about my husband's potential, I felt that I was not really seeing the whole picture.  I was choosing to see the awesome things he is and does but not putting enough significance on things that I didn't like about him.  As a result, these have been major problems in our marriage and it's a struggle every single day. 

Jerzymom
by Bronze Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:35 PM
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I'm old fashion I guess. I married my husband because he makes me happy. I love him for who he is. I married for love. To be loved by someone unconditionally. He married me for the same reasons. I always thought if you love someone enough everything will work out. As long as you are "together".

Jerzymom
by Bronze Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:39 PM

No one is perfect. You can find fault in anyone. Even yourself. You must work on focusing on the "good" qualities.  

MomToovey
by Marianne on Aug. 13, 2014 at 5:49 PM

 LOL at the sentence " For those of us who met our current DH/SO when they were younger..." I know what you mean by that, but it made me giggle. We were all younger when we met our SO, even if it was yesterday ;) And we were younger too, not just them. There was untapped potential they had to see in us as well.

Anyway, I knew my DH posessed all the qualities and characteristics I needed from a husband/the father of my child. So it was very easy to see his potential!

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