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Love & Marriage Love & Marriage

He is having an emotional affair.

Posted by on Aug. 25, 2014 at 1:05 AM
  • 16 Replies
The things he does. & the things he doesn't do. He doesn't:
return my cheesy text messages, a lot of times he doesn't return my I love yous or I miss yous.
Text me back for a long period of time(like an hour or longer) and then its just a short text.

He told me he is excited for work tomorrow. He hates work though. He said he needs money. We all do, yes, but one he's paid biweekly, and two, who is excited about going to a shit job just to get paid in two weeks? Not anyone I know. He's never been excited about going to a shitty job no matter how much he was making. I'm sick to my stomach. I have an idea of who it may be. A Mexican co worker. I saw three of them and him come out of his work when he got off. I don't know what to say. He hardly texts me on his break anymore. I'm done I think....I emotionally cheated on him a year ago. He's acting...well how I did. What do I do?! We just had a baby a week ago!
by on Aug. 25, 2014 at 1:05 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Lindalou907
by Bronze Member on Aug. 25, 2014 at 1:52 AM

I had an emotional affair many years ago, it didn't mean that I didn't also love my husband, don't assume he doesn't love you and the baby, maybe he is in "love" with someone at work, maybe not, I would confront him and I would be understanding since you did the same thing mama, you know how it happens. And stop texting him at work. You also could be wrong ya know, maybe he is distant because he feels like you cant have sex yet or something, remember you are a little hormonal right now because you just had your baby, don't freak out, hugs!

TommyAbby
by Melissa on Aug. 25, 2014 at 6:15 AM

If you just had a baby a week ago, let those raging hormones calm down. 

He may be excited for work due to talking about your new baby, He may be excited to get away from baby duty for a bit

And as far as texting.. HE'S WORKING!!!!!!!! He is doing his job that brings the money in to take care of you. 

UCFknight
by Silver Member on Aug. 25, 2014 at 7:05 AM

 Congratulations on your newest bundle of joy, but why don't you spend time in the moment with your newborn. Ask if you are really that freaked out about it, but I agree with Melissa. He is at work, I don't text my husband at work. I don't get why so many people do that.

lapcounter
by Gold Member on Aug. 25, 2014 at 7:44 AM
Talk to him about it.
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DisabledVet
by on Aug. 25, 2014 at 7:55 AM

Maybe he's feeling neglected or maybe he's paying you back. You need to make him feel special again.

Fayanne
by Gold Member on Aug. 25, 2014 at 8:18 AM

 1) are you married?

2) were you so wrapped up in this pregnancy that you neglected him?

affairs generally start when our emotional needs aren't met, so, if you didn't give him the time of day or the respect and support he needed, he probably found it somewhere else

Ask him what's going on, maybe you'll get the truth, maybe you won't. Tell him you want to improve your relationship, and ask him what he needs.

good luck

Serenity7
by Platinum Member on Aug. 25, 2014 at 10:34 AM

 Talk to him about it

 

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MomToovey
by Marianne on Aug. 25, 2014 at 11:11 AM

 It's a little different to me since you've done it before. So you do know the signs. BUT for what it's worth, when I just had my baby, I had myself convinced my DH was having an affair too. But one night, in a PPD meltdown I yelled at him for preferring to be out of the house to get away from me and the baby. The heartbreak in his eyes when I said that was all I needed to know the whole thing was all in my head.

I might try talking to him about it, but I honestly think I would wait for those hormones to slow down and get a bit more sleep before jumping to conclusions.

Good luck, and congratulations!

furbabymum
by Gold Member on Aug. 25, 2014 at 11:12 AM
1 mom liked this

 You sound extremely insecure. He doesn't text you at work and you are freaking out? Sheesh.

LadyBast
by Brenda on Aug. 25, 2014 at 11:18 AM

I totally agree and talk to him!

My hubby does not text me back at work or when I call some times no answer do I care nope he is WORKING!!!! let the man work and make money to support you. Would you rather he sit home on his ass and not do a thing no money coming in?? 

Quoting TommyAbby:

If you just had a baby a week ago, let those raging hormones calm down. 

He may be excited for work due to talking about your new baby, He may be excited to get away from baby duty for a bit

And as far as texting.. HE'S WORKING!!!!!!!! He is doing his job that brings the money in to take care of you. 


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