Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you agree with her advice?

Posted by on Oct. 26, 2015 at 2:15 PM
  • 28 Replies


I like to read Dear Prudie...this is her advice to a recent question.  What do you think?  Do you agree with Prudie's advice, or would you advise this person differently? 

Q. Lady Killer: One of my good friends, “Chelsea,” has been dating a seemingly nice guy, “Larry,” for the past six months. They are both in their late 20s and Chelsea is very open about the possibility of settling down and starting a life with Larry. Through a shared acquaintance I recently learned that while Larry was in college he was accused of murdering his roommate. During his trial he was found innocent, but all materials from the case make the verdict seem only as a result of a lack of evidence. Chelsea has never made mention of this and I am not sure she is even aware of Larry’s past. I fear for her safety and think Larry’s murderous history is important for her to know. Is it within my place to inform Chelsea?

A: I do think “I need to tell you that I was acquitted of murdering my college roommate” is an important conversation to have with a beloved. Let’s hope Chelsea knows, has done her own due diligence, and is confident that the verdict was just. But if she doesn’t know, she needs to. Keep in mind, that if you tell her, there could be a “shoot the messenger” problem. But the message has to get to her. If he hasn’t told her, that alone should make her run.

by on Oct. 26, 2015 at 2:15 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
LadyBast
by Brenda on Oct. 26, 2015 at 4:33 PM

Never heard of her :)

Fayanne
by Platinum Member on Oct. 26, 2015 at 5:23 PM

 I thought the "shoot the messenger" line was rather.. ehm... lame... given the fact that the guy stood trial for murder.

yes, she needs to be told. It doesn't go to trial unless a grand jury thinks there was a crime

 

KAmamaJ
by Member on Oct. 26, 2015 at 5:26 PM
Yes, she needs to be told.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
.MiaBella.
by on Oct. 27, 2015 at 12:16 AM

Agree with her advice

kika.fleur
by Silver Member on Oct. 27, 2015 at 7:36 AM

Of course she needs to know. 

MomToovey
by Marianne on Oct. 27, 2015 at 11:19 AM
I agree that the "shoot the messenger" was in poor taste. And I also agree with Prudie that this should have already been a discussion between them. However, she does need to know, and in the off chance she doesn't, someone needs to say something. I agree with the advice given.
sarahjz
by Sarah on Oct. 27, 2015 at 1:02 PM


Quoting MomToovey: I agree that the "shoot the messenger" was in poor taste. And I also agree with Prudie that this should have already been a discussion between them. However, she does need to know, and in the off chance she doesn't, someone needs to say something. I agree with the advice given.

Seems like it would be a difficult (though necessary) thing to bring up to a friend.

sarahjz
by Sarah on Oct. 27, 2015 at 1:02 PM


Quoting LadyBast:

Never heard of her :)

Kind of a modern day Ann Landers.

sarahjz
by Sarah on Oct. 27, 2015 at 1:04 PM


Quoting Fayanne:

 I thought the "shoot the messenger" line was rather.. ehm... lame... given the fact that the guy stood trial for murder.

yes, she needs to be told. It doesn't go to trial unless a grand jury thinks there was a crime

 

Seems like a pretty shady thing to hide from someone. Then again...how do you broach that subject with a date?

sarahjz
by Sarah on Oct. 27, 2015 at 1:04 PM


Quoting .MiaBella.:

Agree with her advice

How do bring that kind of thing up to a friend?

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)