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In the bedroom... 😉

Posted by on Mar. 7, 2018 at 11:27 PM
  • 8 Replies
Well, dh and I celebrated 14 years of marriage about 3 weeks ago.. I love dh today just as much, if not more, than I did when we get married! He’s a teacher and doesn’t get him until 4:15 in the evening and then leaves tocoach baseball at 5 and doesn’t get back until 8 or later.. I’m feeling insecure and a bit depressed! I don’t get much attention with ball season and I feel like he isn’t attracted to me anymore! We do have sex. Only like once or twice a week which I guess might be normal.. And it’s amazing and I know I still turn him on but I’m just having issues. I feel very blah and disgusting lately. I think it’s due to the fact that he’s lot a lot of weight. Like 100 pounds.. I’m afraid he’s going to look for someone else.. Idk. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I don’t want to seem crazy and I don’t want to annoy him. But I just feel bad about myself and I can’t get him to understand. I need someone to work out with or something to help me stay on track.. 😩😩😩
by on Mar. 7, 2018 at 11:27 PM
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by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2018 at 10:23 AM
I'm sorry you're feeling this way. My husband and I will celebrate 14 years in April. I think it's just something we all go through to feel this way. Do you think maybe he's feeling insecure because of his weight gain and in turn it's making you feel insecure? I think it's great that you're still in love, so are my husband and I.
by Member on Mar. 8, 2018 at 12:37 PM
Do you feel neglected?Does it feel like he has no time for you but has time for other people?Does he contribute around the house?Do you fight often?Do you hang out with friends?You need to sort things out and have a talk with your husband.About wanting to look good for your husband.Do it.Find an activity that you like.Join a gym.Walk.Run.Watch what you eat.Remember in the beginning you always wanted to look good for him?Don’t just care about how you look when you go to a party or work.There will be times when we don’t have the energy to look nice but we should at least try even at home.Men are visual and even if they say they don’t care what you look because they love you,trust me,they do.
by Platinum Member on Mar. 9, 2018 at 5:34 PM

figure out how to be confident in the skin that you do have while you work on working off the extra pounds. Men hate needy and  insecure... they LOVE a confident woman... So.. fake it 'til you make it.

good luck.

by on Mar. 12, 2018 at 3:45 PM

Hi, Congratulations on 14 years of marriage! I read your post and my heart goes out to you. I completely get how you are feeling. Have you sat him down and had a very honest conversation with him? I know for me I had to have that conversation with my husband, and it really helped me feel better. A couple of days later from that conversation, I got myself all shaved, lotion uped, and dressed in my best bedroom wear. I met him at the door, and boy was he surprised! It made me feel incredibly sexy and he of course enjoyed that surprise! Good luck :).

by on Mar. 13, 2018 at 9:52 PM
Congratulations on 14 years of marriage!  I think that's awesome!  I don't know about you, but I always seem to feel a little worse about myself during the winter months.  I think what they say about how lack of sunlight affects our moods is so true. 
It sounds like this is a busy season for your husband.  I think it's great that he teaches then goes to coach - more men should step up like he does!  I bet he's a wonderful man.  
I really like your idea about getting with a friend and working on yourself..  I find spending times with my girlfriends so rejuvenating, and it makes "work", such as working out, a lot more fun.  Perhaps you could come up with an eating and workout plan together and work towards keeping each other accountable. 
As well, I wonder if you couldn't get out occasionally and catch a movie or paint a picture with one of your girlfriends while he's coaching.  Do something you enjoy - that will help restore your soul and put a smile on your face, and before you know it, hopefully his busy season will have passed and you'll have more time to spend with him and look fabulous to boot!
by on Mar. 16, 2018 at 3:22 PM

Congratulations on 14 years of marriage! That is fantastic! I am sorry you are feeling the way you do. Have you talked to him about it? I think that it is common for people to find identity and value from their spouse, so I would suggest talking to him openly about it and then start doing the things that make you feel good! Go for a walk, spend some time with friends, etc. I will be praying you find peace in this season of marriage!

by New Member on Mar. 18, 2018 at 1:49 PM

I think you should do something nice for yourself. 

by New Member on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:16 AM

I'm happy for you that you have made the 14 years of marriage. That is fantastic!  It is hard when there is one spouse that is working more than the other. Sometimes it seems like they have time for everyone else but you. Do not let this make you feel insecure. Inquire if he needs an assistant coach. Maybe schedule a time to meet directly after his practice for a short date for ice cream or a soda. Sometimes you just need to change things up a bit and make the first move to spend more time with him in his arena so he will want to join you in yours.

Keep the faith and know he loves you. Love conquers all if you work together.

Stay Strong!

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