My aunt and her bf are both unemployed and now that my aunt is collecting unemployment she no longer qualifies for food stamps. They go days without food. So I invited then over for dinner tomorrow and my mom tells me to be careful and not allow myself to be taken advantage of. I just can't stand the thought of my own family going hungry. I think my mom doesn't want me to be too nice and have it become a regular thing, that they depend upon. I don't want to be depended upon either.
What do you think??
Quoting DawnPratt23:
There are resources to help people like him. We are our own future. I'm a firm believer of not complaining if you aren't willing to change. I'd take him to a job bank, and start the application for housing.
Quoting Hellcat1980:
Be careful with that me and my household offered to help a guy get back on his feet last October....he is still here and no one wants to ask him to leave cause he will be homeless
We have tried to help in every way possible right down to my DH giving him a large sum of money to get him on his feet but he is still here and I feel like I am taking care of a teen and a newborn. He stays up all night sleeps all day and loves the access to the ps3 and big screen tv. Since DH gave him the money he is controlling the timeline. August 1 he gets his 30 day notice....can not get here fast enough.
I suspect they are not desperate enough to find any old job. I think they are being selective about it. If they get a job at the local Target or something, they lose unemployment, and the money from that is more than a minimum wage job, I think. But IDK. Truth be told, her bf makes me a little uncomfortable. He's nice, but he's the know it all type. So if he knows so much about so much, why doesn't he have his shit together in his 50s, ya know?
Quoting barefootmommi:
Quoting Shelley927:
I think once or twice a month would be ok but maybe you should offer to go shopping with her not for her and try to find the cheapest stuff possible and make sure they go to a food bank seperately to gain more food....
this seems like the best solution. Ate jobs scarce in that area?
a few meals here and there is such a nice thing...just dont give any $$$
hopefully they can find work soon...my hubs lost his job last month and we have nothing coming in... :-(
Quoting KenzieQsMommy:
She is collecting unemployment, so there's her income. If she had kids it'd probably be different
Quoting DawnPratt23:
If there is no income they still qualify for food stamps, and should appeal.
A meal now and then isn't a bad thing. I'd help find resources that they could use to get back on their feet.
Quoting DawnPratt23:
How much is their unemployment? When I received mine, before kids I still qualified for ra. You'd have to be making good amount on unemployment to be disqualified for it.
Quoting KenzieQsMommy:
She is collecting unemployment, so there's her income. If she had kids it'd probably be different
Quoting DawnPratt23:
If there is no income they still qualify for food stamps, and should appeal.
A meal now and then isn't a bad thing. I'd help find resources that they could use to get back on their feet.
Stand firm, it is your house, he's not family, give him a 24 hour notice. I'd remove all things he likes to a storage, make his existence in the house uncomfortable. And if you can find, rent the old vhs movie mad house, with kristie alley. That is what happens when you are too nice.
Quoting Hellcat1980:
Quoting DawnPratt23:
There are resources to help people like him. We are our own future. I'm a firm believer of not complaining if you aren't willing to change. I'd take him to a job bank, and start the application for housing.
Quoting Hellcat1980:
Be careful with that me and my household offered to help a guy get back on his feet last October....he is still here and no one wants to ask him to leave cause he will be homeless
We have tried to help in every way possible right down to my DH giving him a large sum of money to get him on his feet but he is still here and I feel like I am taking care of a teen and a newborn. He stays up all night sleeps all day and loves the access to the ps3 and big screen tv. Since DH gave him the money he is controlling the timeline. August 1 he gets his 30 day notice....can not get here fast enough.
My Grandpa had a saying: Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.
for me it depends on what kind of bind and why/how they got there.
I have a friend that was in an abusive relationship with medical issues and i helped her budget and talked her thru canning/freezing plus meal planning. But I also sent diapers/wipes for her youngest. She lives in IL and i was in CO at the time.
What i did helped her alot but then things got worse and she had to get into a women's shelter and relocate ASAP. She has no way of contacting anyone last i knew.
See if they can go to any food banks, churches etc and I think once in a while is ok but I wouldn't do it often and I might even go buy a few things once in a while and give them a few things.
Credit question?
- KenzieQsMommy
on Jul. 5, 2012 at 10:23 PM