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Possible (likely) Asperger's Syndrome

Posted by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 4:06 AM
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Possible Asperger's Syndrome.

My 13 year old may have Asperger's Syndrome.  For several years, I've known that my son is "different"  than other children.  I never understood why. I got him a therapist to try to help him, his father and me understand why he is always unhappy and why he doesn't  make/keep friends.  Just the other day, I was reading an article on circle of moms about Asperger's Syndrome.  I had never heard of it and the name piqued my curiosity.  I read the article that contained 10 signs that your child my have Asperger's.  I kind of chuckled and thought he first sign sounded like it fit my son to a T.  I read on and discovered all 10 of the signs/symptoms fit my son to a T.  I was devastated to know that my son could be austitic. Yesterday, I spoke with his therapist and suggested my son be tested. He said he thought it was a good idea because he, too, thought my son exhibited many of the symptoms associated with Asperger's.  I have spent a good deal of the day crying and wondering what the future holds for my son.

Will he ever be a functioning contributing member of society? Before yesterday, I always thought that he was a normal kid--just a little socially awkward. Does Asperger's change any of that?  He is still the same boy he was yesterday, I just have a name for his "oddness."

I feel so confused and like I have to grieve the loss of the future I wanted and hoped he would have.

 

Do children with Asperger's Sydrome live normal lives?  Do they go to college, obtain gainful employment, get married, have children?  What can I expect? 

Please help!

 

by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 4:06 AM
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Replies (1-7):
aidensmomma508
by Wendy on Nov. 9, 2011 at 7:28 AM
1 mom liked this

I think alot of Aspergers kids are pretty normal with some quirks and some socially awkward challenges, so no that doesn't change!  Alot of kids with Aspergers go on to lead great lives, get married, have children, go to college, work.  They may struggle along the way but they are awesome kids! I know there are some members of this group with older children I think can answer these questions. Welcome to the group!!!

Carma998
by on Nov. 13, 2011 at 3:19 AM

Thanks for the response.  That makes me feel a lot better.  Over the last few days, I've had an opportunity to let it sink in and start accepting it and the fact that our lives are going to be different than I thought. My main concern now is making sure my son acquires the skills he needs to succeed on his own. When I talk to people about it, I still find myself shedding an ocassional tear, but  I'm not sure why. I told  my son about the syndrome and the upcoming testing.  He cried because he already has a very poor self image due to the way he is treated at school.  He feels like it's just one more thing that is going to make his life more difficult. How do I find people who have adult children with Asperger's syndrome and strategies that helped them succeed?


Faewds
by on Nov. 13, 2011 at 4:10 AM

Hope this helps.. Hang in there and take one step at time. 

Quoting Carma998:

Possible Asperger's Syndrome.

For several years, I've known that my son is "different"  than other children.  I never understood why. I got him a therapist to try to help him, his father and me understand why he is always unhappy and why he doesn't  make/keep friends. 

I always knew my son was different too. He never made friends or played or hugged us like a "normal" child would. He had a extremly sensitive sence of smell and would panic in crowded areas. He is still like this, but now we know how to handle it and can take steps to help him in these areas.

Just the other day, I was reading an article on circle of moms about Asperger's Syndrome.  I had never heard of it and the name piqued my curiosity.  I read the article that contained 10 signs that your child my have Asperger's.  I kind of chuckled and thought he first sign sounded like it fit my son to a T.  I read on and discovered all 10 of the signs/symptoms fit my son to a T.  I was devastated to know that my son could be austitic. Yesterday, I spoke with his therapist and suggested my son be tested. He said he thought it was a good idea because he, too, thought my son exhibited many of the symptoms associated with Asperger's.  I have spent a good deal of the day crying and wondering what the future holds for my son.

My sons future will be what he makes it to be. Knowing he has aspergers only helps me help him find his way. 

Will he ever be a functioning contributing member of society?

LOL!  I work in Retail and my son at 10 years old functions and contributes just as well as most ADULT customers that I have to help everyday. There are a lot of wierd crazy folks out there. 

Before yesterday, I always thought that he was a normal kid--just a little socially awkward.

He is a "normal kid" -- just a little socially awkward.. 

Does Asperger's change any of that? 

Asperger's is only a diagnosis, that helps me help him. Helps other people help him and someday will help him understand himself. To relate with others like him. If he can do that.

He is still the same boy he was yesterday, I just have a name for his "oddness."

could not have put it better than that.

I feel so confused and like I have to grieve the loss of the future I wanted and hoped he would have.

His future is the same as it was before, probably better. What ever he may be diagnosed with aspergers or anything else in the world. All you can do is take that information learn from it and grow. 

Do children with Asperger's Sydrome live normal lives?  Do they go to college, obtain gainful employment, get married, have children?  What can I expect? 

YES! They can do any of these things. They are all different people but share some of the same symptons. Just like "normal" people some will go to college, obtain gainful employment, get married, have children. 

Please help!

For me finding out my son had Aspergers was a relief. Now I had an understanding for him. Now I could help him. I used to wish he was "normal" but that was not helping him. I am very proud of my son. He has to struggle with so many things that are so easy for his little brothers. He will never be like everyone else and that is ok. He is still a good caring boy. He tries really hard and I believe there is a nitch out there for everyone. He'll find it and I want to help him get everythig he needs to get him there.





mariesmama
by on Nov. 13, 2011 at 8:40 AM

my hubby has aspergers he works full time at walmart were getting our daughter 2 tested for autism

Kupus
by on Nov. 13, 2011 at 9:29 AM
I also think it is a good thing knowing exactly if your child is on the spectrum because knowledge IS power. He is still the same child but you will know how to try to help him. It is normal that you grieve too but eventually (if he tests that he is on the spectrum) you will accept it and move on working towards helping him. I think it is great that you will test him. Hang in there, everything will be ok.
Carma998
by on Nov. 23, 2011 at 5:08 AM

Thank you.

 

I'm so glad I found this site. The input I get makes me feel a lot better. I just want my son to be happy and many times he is not because children at school bully him and make fun of him.  He wants so badly to have friends and fit it.  I want that for him, but I don't want him to try and change who he is to get other kids to like him.  I want him to choose friends who will like him for who he is.  That is really hard when people are afraid to accept those who not like them.

Carma998
by on Nov. 30, 2011 at 5:13 AM

Does anyone believe Jenny McCarthy's story of how she healed her son?  Does anyone believe it's really possible?  Has anyone had that kind of success or even close to it? Has anyone read her books?  Does everyone believe the medical community when they say there is no cure? Do vaccinations really trigger autism? Are there treatments that help childrent function like neurotypicals? Has anyone tried Hyperbaric Oxygen treatments?  Do they help? Does anyone live in Nebraska?  There are no local support groups here. The closest one is over 2 hours away.  I would like my son to meet other Aspies and socialize with them. I don't know how to find them. Can anyone offer help/suggestions?

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