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My ASD son can be so mean

Posted by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:29 AM
  • 11 Replies
My ASD son is so mean to his younger brother who is NT. He is constantly correcting him even when he is wrong. And to be quite honest our younger NT son is more advanced but my older son still corrects his coloring, spelling, etc. It is hurting our younger sons feelings and confidence. I am not sure what to do. It breaks my heart how cold he is to everyone.
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:29 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mallowcup17
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 3:52 PM

selena is like this with dakota(our nt 3 year old). its hard. we try to redirect when she is doing this, its not always easy and she can be quite pushy about it too. i totally understand where you are coming from. ((hugs))

sunsign4u2
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:00 PM

I go through it with all of my children. my son who is on the spectrum and functions much lower than my other kids is constantly telling them they are doing stuff wrong. or he is telling me what they are doing wrong. but when it comes to him doing the same things wrong he gets upset when they try to correct him. I try to tell him that telling on them all time is not nice and that it hurts their feelings when the only time he really talks to them is to tell them they are wrong about somehing, You are not alone in this.

britniwheeler
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 5:27 PM
Thanks girls! ((HUGS)). Its just so hard. I'm not sure what to do.
ROGUEM
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:02 PM
1 mom liked this

My son went through a social skills class about being a tattle-tale and a rule police.  The psychologist said that ASD children see things in black and white and don't understand why people break rules.  She said it is a normal for them to want everything to be correct and in it place - including other people's behavior. She also explained why they only recognize their opinion as the correct one.  Part of this is because they can't understand another person's point of view - they really only see their own.  My son was much better after this class.

You might want to check in your town if they offer social skill classes on various subjects like this one.  

 

 

suziler
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:28 PM

that totally sounds like my Sierra they will be offering her Social skills classes at her school now I am so excited about it!!

Quoting ROGUEM:

My son went through a social skills class about being a tattle-tale and a rule police.  The psychologist said that ASD children see things in black and white and don't understand why people break rules.  She said it is a normal for them to want everything to be correct and in it place - including other people's behavior. She also explained why they only recognize their opinion as the correct one.  Part of this is because they can't understand another person's point of view - they really only see their own.  My son was much better after this class.

You might want to check in your town if they offer social skill classes on various subjects like this one.  

 

 


ajs16919
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:32 PM

you are so good at explaing things michelle :)

Quoting ROGUEM:

My son went through a social skills class about being a tattle-tale and a rule police.  The psychologist said that ASD children see things in black and white and don't understand why people break rules.  She said it is a normal for them to want everything to be correct and in it place - including other people's behavior. She also explained why they only recognize their opinion as the correct one.  Part of this is because they can't understand another person's point of view - they really only see their own.  My son was much better after this class.

You might want to check in your town if they offer social skill classes on various subjects like this one.  

 

 


ROGUEM
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:42 PM

 thank you :)  you are very kind.

Quoting ajs16919:

you are so good at explaing things michelle :)

Quoting ROGUEM:

My son went through a social skills class about being a tattle-tale and a rule police.  The psychologist said that ASD children see things in black and white and don't understand why people break rules.  She said it is a normal for them to want everything to be correct and in it place - including other people's behavior. She also explained why they only recognize their opinion as the correct one.  Part of this is because they can't understand another person's point of view - they really only see their own.  My son was much better after this class.

You might want to check in your town if they offer social skill classes on various subjects like this one.  

 

 

 

 

E_is_4_Ethan
by on Nov. 27, 2011 at 2:23 AM

that is my son! lol... the rule police

Quoting ROGUEM:

My son went through a social skills class about being a tattle-tale and a rule police.  The psychologist said that ASD children see things in black and white and don't understand why people break rules.  She said it is a normal for them to want everything to be correct and in it place - including other people's behavior. She also explained why they only recognize their opinion as the correct one.  Part of this is because they can't understand another person's point of view - they really only see their own.  My son was much better after this class.

You might want to check in your town if they offer social skill classes on various subjects like this one.  

 

 


shell3m
by on Nov. 27, 2011 at 2:24 AM

 We don't tolerate that in our house.  Siblings are supposed to love and support each other NOT break each other down.  I do focus on telling Dean what's up, I also focus on my younger two (well mainly my middle son because he's only a year younger than Dean) and tell him to not pay attention to what Dean is saying when he's being that way.  "You know you are smart and are doing a great job, don't worry about what Dean says and if it bothers you, you can always come talk to me about it and we'll work through how you feel".   And Garrett has come to me tons of times and we talk about and work through.   I'm trying to teach Garrett coping skills because I can't change Dean, I can try to tone him down, which you can ask anybody in this group....LOL  I do alot but my other two need to know that it has NOTHING to do with them, it's in Dean's head and he can't get past something.  "So it might seem like it's you but it's not".  Garrett seems to respond quite well to that, of course he's only 5 so we work on it everyday...lol  :)  I hope that helped some.  :)

JKent958
by on Nov. 27, 2011 at 11:40 AM

My grandson will be 7 next month and now it is everyone's fault even if he did it to himself!  At least he is better behaved than he was when he was younger.  When he was younger, he would spit or stick out his tongue if someone said something he didn't like.  But I am hoping he learns more social skills.  He is in a special school and has group counseling with the other boys in his class.  I believe the counselor is trying to teach him some empathy for others.  GMA Judy

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