Wow, Im the original poster...YOU HAVE NO IDEA!
Wow, I submitted my shameful post, then sat and tried to identify a feeling, any feeling. I was interrupted by the sound of the trees being whipped around by a wind storm here. Watched the storm and opened the windows to listen.
I came back to the computer and updated my screen to find so many replies! Very wonderful to see complete strangers taking the time and energy to respond. Honestly, seeing that kind of attentive reaction instantly gave me a specific physical feeling. This is a GOOD feeling and since your kindness allowed me to FEEL it, I want you to understand, if I can get you to....
LET'S TRY: Remember your "work friend's" wedding? Sitting there at that round table surrounded by cheerful banter from tables and guests everywhere?
Many of us have experienced this scenario. That feeling of being alone and lonely. Then, before the waiter finished topping off your glass of Merlot, you see co-workers quickly finding places for their purses etc.and at your table!
RELIEF! In that moment, the negative physical feeling of isolation, changes to a knowing you belong to, or 'feeling' part of a group.. It's been so long since I felt a similar connection, I didnt know I NEED that in my life. Thank you all so much.
That being said, honestly I have no idea how to navigate my way through these messages. I think some posts are meant for other posters....which is reminding me of a gathering of female friends, involved in a compelling conversation one spring afternoon. From what I can see, looks like this get-together is casual with friends coming and going...often to return back to the conversation. All so familiar...I miss that too! I'm incomplete for lack of these emotions I once took for granted.
Ladies, thank you so much for giving me two distinct feelings because I know now two NEEDS I consider a requirement for myself.....like food. (don't ask please)
If it's possible to find a reply to my post and follow that 'conversation', I'd LOVE to learn how! Until that time, thank you again and I'm also grateful for something else: You have all provided me something to do tonight!
I have a suspicion trying to find your messages among the words will prove the most fulfilling activity in far too long. Actually looking forward to finding your words of wisdom!