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Meltdowns Versus Shut Downs

Posted by on May. 19, 2012 at 10:32 AM
  • 22 Replies

I have mentioned several times about how rather than the extreme tantrum meltdowns I've seen so many describe, that my son's meltdowns are more of a withdrawal into himself...

This morning I found this:

And now I have the appropriate terminology to describe the difference. So my son doesn't actually have meltdowns because he is able to halt the process with his shutdown instead.

Checkout this Group on Facebook.... it is very informative. It's becoming one of my favs. 

by on May. 19, 2012 at 10:32 AM
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by on May. 19, 2012 at 10:48 AM
R shuts down. She rarely melts down. When she shuts down it can take hours to get her back.
by Emma on May. 19, 2012 at 1:37 PM
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I do that. I shut down if I can tell it's coming to prevent a full fledged melt down.

I had a meltdown the other day that ended up with me freaking out on my husband. ^.^ 

we were trying to talk about doctors (a hot button for me to start with) I was struggling to grasp the conversation, and was trying to keep up with him and he kept interupting me and wouldn't let me finished, then I was on the verge of tears, THEN he told me "well, fine, just talk and tell me when your done so I can say my turn."

-- In his defense - I hesitate when I talk alot, so people think I'm done speaking - but i'm trying to pull up the words to use, then people interupt me because they are too impatient to actually WAIT and see if I'm done... and not just assume I'm done and not let me finish. - this is the fastest way to cause me to melt done is over verbal speech.

Yep. I melted down over that conversation. LOL THEN he tried to squeeze me and I had to explai nto him later that squeezing only works on me if he's helping me work through a trigger that's not *him* being the root cause of the melt down. LOL

If he's the trigger, the dog gets to be squeezed... not him.

by on May. 19, 2012 at 1:42 PM
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My oldest (7) does both... depending on the situation she shuts down or melts down. Sometimes its days before I know what actually triggered her. My other child on the spectrum (3) is all meltdown. He unleashes on the world, ready or not. 

by on May. 19, 2012 at 2:21 PM
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Interesting.  Thanks.  My son shuts down.  He doesn't kick, bite, etc.  He just sits in the corner and cries.  

by on May. 19, 2012 at 2:36 PM
We meltdown. Constantly.
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by on May. 19, 2012 at 4:45 PM
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My Daughter shutsdown, not meltsdown. it was more evident when she was sent for assessment at a nursery 1 afternoon a week, for autism and developemental delays.we'd ask her what she did and she would completely shut of, refused to speak about it refused us any eye contact at all.

by on May. 19, 2012 at 4:47 PM
My son has both.
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by on May. 19, 2012 at 5:04 PM

johny is more of a shut downer ..hes a good kit rarely melts down its either sa mild temper tantrum or a full on shut down

by on May. 19, 2012 at 5:21 PM
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I shut down-but if pushed while in that state I will meltdown. I got fired once because of it. My boss made a huge mistake that he left on me, but I didn't have the capabity to correct. I called him I to work. I went into focus to do my part to fix. Once it was he demanded to speak to me. I told him-you're going to want to wait on this. But he said, no now. He started with-YOU DON'T EVER CALL ME AT HOME AND DEMAND THAT I COME INTO WORK! I AM THE MANAGER!!!
Me: THEN BLEEPING ACT LIKE YOU'RE THE MANAGER!!! ... and proceeded to tell him every stupid thing he'd done in the few months he'd been manager-yelling, tears streaming down my face. I simply cannot lower my voice in meltdown mode. He fired me. The district manager who hired me, called me back in and re-hired me. I was right, but man I hate that tornado building feeling and the things that come out of my mouth. I need NO interaction to stop it, even as an adult. If it gets
loose, just have to ride it out.
My DD just meltsdown. If my DD ever stopped talking I would think something was seriously wrong.
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by on May. 19, 2012 at 5:52 PM

Interesting.  I have seen my son have a full on meltdown and then shutdown.  He will cry, and not talk to me or respond for a couple of hours.  Normally it is only a meltdown but I have seen both on rare occassions. 

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