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Diagnosis, sad and shocked.

Posted by on May. 23, 2012 at 11:40 AM
  • 25 Replies
We received Odin's diagnosis and it is Asperger's and ADHD. The ADHD part I am shocked about, I just didn't think he had that. She talked about medication for the ADHD but I am scared about it because he is only 4 and I just don't want to put drugs into his little body. I'm just confused about what I should do at this point. I have contacted the school district to get him in the preschool in our district for next year. Last year he attended a preschool at the community center but half way through the year he needed an aide to "survive" as they put it. Can anyone share what their experiences with ADHD or Aspergers have been like for their child and what therapies have they benefited from the most? Do you medicate your child for ADHD. I have read so many horrible things about the medication used for ADHD and most if it sounds like it's a "wait and see" thing. I knew an ASD diagnosis was coming but I still feel sad about it and cried most of Monday. Don't know why I was crying and I also feel mad but who I am mad at I don't know. I think in the back of my mind I was hoping the doctor would say "Get outta here he's just fine" I know that sounds stupid but I guess I was just holding out hope that I was wrong about him. Sorry I am rambling on but my mind has been racing for two days with all of the "what do I do next, How will he be in school, can he be successful in life, will he need special Ed or main stream??" I feel like I am on a roller coaster that is never going to stop and let me get off!
by on May. 23, 2012 at 11:40 AM
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by on May. 23, 2012 at 11:51 AM
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Take some time. It will get better.

As for the ADHD stuff, honestly dont be surprised by it. If anything, I am actually surprised that they bothered to label it separately because lost (dare I say MOST) ASD kids demonstrate ADHD-like behavior anyway, so it's like chicken and the egg. Some have even argued that ASD could be looked at as the far extreme of ADD/ADHD continuum. Rare is the ASD child that doesn't have ADD/ADHD-like tendencies.

One word of advice (and my son is not on any meds) is not to be overly opinionated for or against meds. If you want to try the behavioral route first because it DOES help, try that. Maybe things will resolve enough where meds are off the table or resolve ENOUGH that the need for meds won't be as strong as it may look right now, or whatever else. You don't have to make up your min do nhtis today, and even if you do, you can change your mind later.

Hang in there.

by on May. 23, 2012 at 11:53 AM
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 First off momma.  HUgs. Its ok to cry.  I am sure we have all cried over a diagnosis at one point in time.   My son has both aspergers and adhd.    We didnt start to medicate his adhd untill first grade. At this point is was beyond painfully obivous that he needed something to help him focus.  He was having a really horrible time.  We started him off on non stimulant medication and that didnt work really well.   He was still really impulsive and inattentive.  Around 2nd grade we started him on Concerta and almost immedietly everyone noticed a huge difference in him.  His impulsiveness was gone and his inattentive ness was manageable.   He is now in the 7th grade and does wonderful and is still on concerta.    He has his days but we have worked with the school district since day one when he was just an adhd kid. The school district diagnoses aspergers in the 4th grade.   They have been a great resource for us through this.    My son has always been in mainstream classroom with some intervention classwork and he had his OT and ST through elementary and now in middle school he only sees an intervention specialist as needed.  

As far as our hopes and goals for the future for now I am taking that one year at a time.  I often find myself wondering how will he ever function as an adult but he has come so far in such a few years that it amazes me.  

Get with the school and get an IEP started for him.   Ask the doctors what other therapies the recommend.   My son's school provided him speech and occupational therapy.   And relax momma.  Take this one day at a time.  He already has you in his corner you can do this.  We are here for you.

by on May. 23, 2012 at 11:53 AM

i believe in mainstreaming  with pullout for his therepys etc but thats what works for johny.he can be anything asd is not a death sentence have you heard of the dr temple grandin(?sp) shes autistic!!

by on May. 23, 2012 at 11:54 AM

i am starting to wonde rif its adhd in my son so hopin to get it figured out before kindergarten starts in the fall

by on May. 23, 2012 at 11:58 AM

(( Hugs )) Mama! On the positive side atleast now you have some answers and can start moving forward with what will best work for him.  Not much help on the medication side for ADHD, but what do you feel about it?  Do you think he needs it?  Would it help him progress?  Your on an emotional roller coaster right now and it will take awhile to settle down.  Not everything has to be decided today, take a break for a day if you can.  Start with getting him in preschool and move on from there.  Don't worry about the future questions like will he be successful in life?  special ed or mainstream?  it will drive you crazy.  Deal with them as they come.  It will be ok you can do this!!

by Member on May. 23, 2012 at 12:03 PM
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You have options. First, get the book "Autism Revolution". It goes through a lot of options for treatment and therapy. I would be wary of going straight to medication but that is a personal bias. We found a new pediatrician when medication was suggested, again my personal view that I wanted to try other options first.

I have a 6 year old with aspergers and he is finishing up his kindergarten year and he was the star of the kindergarten play last week. What a big change from last year in pre-k when he spent a lot of time under the table. Every kid is different, so you need to find a pediatrician that can support your treatment choices. What we did -- OT for sensory intergration, specifically Listenez music and astronaut training therapy, we had a full speech assessment but no delay (actually very advanced), ABA therapy through a social skills group with boys his age, gluten free casein free diet with supplements, treating (still) for candida (yeast), and most recently martial arts (loves it) rather than physical therapy for coordination and poor muscle tone. We also put him in a small private school where we pay extra for him to have an aid. He is ahead of his class academically and the aid has really focued on his socialization. The school is small and quiet which is good for his sensory processing. He gets to have advanced academic work with social support and a good sensory environment (like he can go outside if the classroom gets too loud) not available in public school. This plan is working for us. Every kid is different but therapy and diet and nutrition can make a world of difference. 

I remember the days of locking myself in the bathroom and crying. It will get better. Good luck.

by Silver Member on May. 23, 2012 at 12:03 PM
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If you don't feel that he needs medication, you are not required to give it to him. You do what you feel is best and don't feel pressured by anyone to do what you don't feel right with.

My husband has ADHD and he's bipolar He has been on so many different medications in his life. He says the he has no memory of periods in his life due to certain medications. He has found ways to cope with his issues without the use of medication.

Other people who are on medication have great results. I know there is a period of time where you have to figure out the right medication and dosage, though.

I have seen people do well with natural herbal remedies.
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by on May. 23, 2012 at 1:13 PM

With are son we kept having teachers tell us he was adhd .But at home he showed no signs of that . I would not drug him for something I did not believe he had .When I realized what he had (aspergers) When I requested the school test him for it I still had reading teacher telling me he was adhd . He came back as having aspergers I got him into a specialist on aspbergers .She told me what the school needed to do to help with that . Kept him in reg classes exspect in the areas he needed the extra help in.They got him a aid to help him in his reg classes it helped him focus when needed on his work .Also with the reading teacher when i asked about the one reading program the specialist recommended she said oh i have been trained in that when she used that program with him he then caught up to grade level in reading .So I would get him with a specialist see what they recamend .He is now in 8th grade and doing great . So get the help he needs and go with your gut feeling on what you think is the right fit for your child . Good luck

by on May. 23, 2012 at 1:35 PM

Dean is in 1/2 reg. class and 1/2 special ed.  that kind of program might work for you guys too.  It's ok to cry and be stunned (we've all been there, trust me we understand) and at least now you have a starting point.  Please keep us updated on what's going on and we'll be here for support, advice and love.  ((Hugs))

by on May. 23, 2012 at 3:32 PM

Thanks so much ladies, it makes me feel so much better chatting with you. I know I have to take a deep breath and one step at a time. I already feel better just posting how I was feeling. I know Odin is the same boy that I love and will always love no matter what. I just want to make sure I make the right choices for him, that's that hard part.

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