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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

NEW TO THIS.  I AM A 42 YEAR OLD MOM OF A 5 YR OLD SON.  TYLER WAS ALWAYS A CRANKY BABY.  GREW NORMAL, SEEMED TO BE VERY SMART AND GOT ALONG GREAT IN A SMALL GROUP.  AS HE GOT ABOUT AGE 2 A CENTER THAT WE TRIED VS IN-HOME CARE APPROACHED ME THAT TYLER DIDN'T STAY STILL, FOCUS AND THAT I SHOULD HAVE HIM EVALUATED!  I PROTECTED MY SON AND LEFT THERE.  NOT UNTIL NOW, HE IS 5 HE HAS BEEN ASKED TO NOT RETURN FROM 3 CENTERS DUE TO HIS AGGRESSIVE, NON COMPLIANT BEHAVIOR.  WHEN FACED WITH CONFLICT HE WILL HIT, KICK, HEAD BUTT, ETC.  HE SEEMS WITHDRAWN AS KIDS CALL HIM MEAN AND BAD.  IT WILL JUST GO OFF BY HIMSELF.  HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN A "ROCKER" NOT BANGER.  HE DID THIS FOR THE 1ST 4 YRS OF LIFE WHEN HE WAS UPSET OR VERY TIRED.  HE WOULD HUM HIMSELF TO SLEEP (THAT WAS ALWAYS A BIT DIFFERENT TO ME).  HE HAS STOPPED BOTH THINGS.

 

THE SCHOOL DIST IS SAYING THAT "THEY" THINK IT'S ADHD, MILD AUTISUM, ETC.  NO REAL DIAGNOSIS.  I HAVE STARTED A DAILY PROBIOTIC, MULTI WITH MAGNESIUM.  IT'S JUST BEEN A FEW WEEKS, BUT HE SEEMS TO BE DOING BETTER ALREADY.  I HAVEN'T WORKED IN ALMOST A MONTH.  I CANNOT FIND ANY CHILDCARE THAT WILL DEAL WITH HIM.  WE ARE BROKE AND DESPERATE.

 

I REALLY NEED SOME FRIENDS.  I HAVE NO FAMILY AND I TELL MY FRIENDS NOTHING OF MY SONS STRUGGLES.

 

I REALLY NEED SOME FRIENDS.

by on May. 23, 2012 at 7:25 PM
Replies (11-18):
Becky0610
by on May. 24, 2012 at 9:00 AM

I am very sad to say that my son's Pediatrician that I do love has NEVER gave me any advice.  I went to him at age 9 mos when my son starting "rocking" and he said it was soothing for him and that it would stop.  When I had to quit my job because of the aggression, he told me to be a good mom and stay home with my son and find play dates.

I am using Natural Vitality Kids Calm Multi liquid. It's got a high amount of Magnesium. They say that Magnesium is "calming". I give him 1 tsp per day and the "live" probiotic 3 times a day in a cold drink. They say the pill form is not as effective. I tried to stop dairy, but he just won't drink the Almond or rice milk. I am getting the Caprisun drinks now (no artificial colors or preserv) I red that red dye and yellow dyes (in mac/cheese) are bad.

His bm's have always been like "peanut butter" and I can remember the sitter always saying that they were terrible stink up the whole house.

I feel like I caused my son to have a "break down" so to speak. We moved, stopped the only sitter he had known since 9 weeks of age, new home, all new surroundings just 1 year ago.

That is when the aggression started at the Daycare Centers. I have NEVER seen my son react this way. I stopped 3 centers (they were being physical with him, in his face constantly). I can relate, I have had to learn to stop and take "10" when dealing with him also. The more I get upset the worse he gets. Hits, kicks, head butts, throws chairs. It has all happened.

I lost my small home business due to the economy and because of no family or sitter for him, I have not worked in almost a year. Tyler's dad works day/night, never home and we still are close to loosing everything (house, care, etc).

I don't know who to call all the centers are horrible here. Tyler starts K Aug 16th with an IEP program and will be in a reg classroom Full Day K so that I can at least find a job 7am-3pm (I pray) minimum wage or whatever I can find.

Siobhan69
by on May. 24, 2012 at 11:11 AM

 Welcome to the group. You will find that the ladies here have great knowledge about ASD and we can all sympathise with your situation. My son is 4 and has been diagnosed with Aspergers. He an be very aggressive like your son. I pushed for a diagnosis from his pediatrician and he referred us to a specialist. You really need to get a referral from your pediatrician. Your son will benefit greatly "if" he is diagnosed and then you can get him the help he needs. 

Hang in there and hugs to you.

RockinMama0608
by on May. 24, 2012 at 11:37 AM

Welcome to the group!  The ladies here are wonderful and you will always have a friend in this group  :) 


magickbaby
by on May. 24, 2012 at 11:40 PM
Hi and welcome. I am 44 yrs. old with and 8 year old daughter on the spectrum. She hasn't hitt any children, pretty much just me and daddy. But for the most part she isn't too aggressive. Anyways, I'm here if you want to talk. Stay strong and try to keep your spirit up ((hugs))
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SandyLaxner
by Bronze Member on May. 25, 2012 at 9:51 AM
1 mom liked this

Your child is entitled to a FAPE(free  and appropriate public education)At age 5 he should be in school.  MY 5 yo on the Autism Spectrum went into special ed preschool on his 3rd b-day in our school district.  He is finishing up preschool now and will start a Pre-K,all day program,w/10 kiddos,a 1:1 aide,special ed 1/2 day,1/2 day w/neurotypical kiddos.  he gets speech therapy and occupational therapy in the classroom.  You don't have to do this alone! 

Mirbaby
by on May. 25, 2012 at 10:13 AM

Hugs to you. I know how overwhelming things can get especially when you don't have family or friends to share your struggles with. This is a great site to vent and have people truly understand what you are going through. Talk to your PCP and they should be able to steer you in the right direction. 

NatureMomof3
by Member on May. 25, 2012 at 11:23 AM

If you are open to trying dietary changes, try removing all casein (milk protein) from his diet. All 3 of my kids, one on the spectrum, have benefited from a GFCF - gluten free casein free diet. Casein will clear his systems in a few weeks and if you see improvements, you will want to try the full diet. The issue with the poop makes me think you may see some improvement. 

Since you don't have a job right now, do you still have health insurance? Maybe you can qualify for medicaid or a children's health insurance program in your state. I know a lot of families at the rehab center where my son goes are there because it accepts medicaid. I have zero experience with that but maybe you can get a diagnosis and get some OT outside of school. Research sensory integration therapy, which many school OTs do not provide. It helped with my son's tantrums and aggression. I know some kids who use Medicaid insurance go to the same OT we use for sensory integration so maybe there is help beyond the school? Also, the ABA clinic where my son goes accepts Medicaid but of course it is different in every state. Anyone know more about this?

I do know that the school does an "educational assessment" for services at school related to educational needs. To get therapy outside of school it must be prescribed by a doctor and you need a medical diagnosis. I have been told they are seperate processes but we don't use public school so I don't have experience with that. 

Hang in there. A lot of hard work with an OT and perhaps ABA therapy can make a huge difference! 

badgermom2012
by on May. 25, 2012 at 2:39 PM

Hi there.  I can relate to some of what you're saying.  I'm the 39 yr old mother of a 3 1/2 yr old on the spectrum.  He's my only child.  I pretty much lost all my friends in the last couple yrs.  Nobody wants to deal with autism.  Also, I homeschool and work with my son intensely on a variety of things everyday.  I'm really exhausted most of the time.  But he is making great progress, so there's no way I'm going to stop and "give myself a break," although that's what most people would recommend.  But it does get lonely and very tiring doing this day in and out.  

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