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Not sure if there's a problem, looking for some input - Update

Posted by on Aug. 17, 2012 at 8:56 PM
  • 8 Replies

I wanted to post this to ask women more experienced than I, if they think my son might have a problem and I apologize for lengthy post.  I am a first time mom, my DS is 20 months old and I wasn't around kids much growing up...so to distinguish sometimes between what's considered average/normal or not is hard for me at times.

My DS only says a few words at this point, mama/dada/hi and not often.  He does not point, wave hi/bye.  They way he indicates he wants food is to bring it to me.  When we read books he'll take my hand and point to things.  I notice he doesn't interact much with kids when he is around them, although he hasn't been around much kids lately.  He will not respond to his name, but will come running if I say bottle or cookie (sometimes I wondered if this was because my MIL calles him one nickname, sometimes I call him a nickname...maybe we all just call him too many different names!)  Sometimes he'll stare at ceiling fan, but not for long periods of time.    

The positive factors I see are that he likes me to hold him, will throw his arms up for me to pick him up often.  If I ask for a kiss, he plops one on the cheek.  He runs, crawls all over the couch, laughs, likes to be tickled.  Goes nuts for Little Einsteins and Mickey mouse, maybe a little too much and I am trying to cut back on his tv.  He loves to eat, anything I give him.  He plays with his toys, and seems to be a very pleasant child.

I guess I am wondering if I am starting to overthink or overlook into everything he does because he isn't talking yet?? I've had some people tell me he seems like a normal child, according to my description.  But I have looked at posts on this site and see similarities with the characteristics that other parents with ASD LOs have.  I do have early intervention coming to evaluate him during the first week of September.  I do appreciate any advice on what else to look for, or even if you think I am a paranoid momma.  Sorry for such a long post!  Thanks, Lina


Update 9/5/12:  I wanted to thank you ladies for all your suggestions, kind words, and support.  Today my son was evaluated by a speech therapist and OT, they found him to have delays in communication, cognitive, and social emotional.  They gave me a bunch of homework on things to work with him on, and at some point in a week or two a case worker will be meeting me to go over the amount of sessions he needs and things like that.  The two evaluators already made their second appt. with Aiden for Sept 24th.  I think I will try starting a journal to keep track of any progress he makes and issues that arise.  They also said I should look into audiology testing and also an eval. by a developmental pediatrician, so I will be doing that asap.

They also mentioned to me  that I should try thinking about day care a few times a week to get him around kids more.  My concern is that since he doesn't really pay attention to kids, and sort of just runs around and does his own things...will a daycare tolerate that?  The evaluators mentioned it would help give him structure and interact with kids, but my concern was in his current state would they even want him there or are there different type of centers for kids with delays to go.

by on Aug. 17, 2012 at 8:56 PM
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Replies (1-8):
Austinsmom4544
by Silver Member on Aug. 17, 2012 at 9:13 PM
1 mom liked this

Early Intervention is a good start.  Doesn't hurt to have him evaluated then go from there.  I don't think your paranoid but it could just be a speech delay never know. 

hwifeandmom
by on Aug. 17, 2012 at 11:04 PM

I have one son on the autism spectrum and one not.  Both of my sons were speech delayed.  My non-autistic son had worse speech delays and needed more help than my autistic son.  We thought at one point that he might have a hearing loss because he didn't respond to us well, but a hearing test revealed that he could hear just fine -- he just didn't always feel like responding, crazy kid.

I think early intervention is great for getting an evaluation and addressing concerns.  Even a simple speech delay is benefitted by early intervention and speech therapy.  And, after doing an evaluation, they can relieve your mind as to what they think is going on.  Regardless of the diagnosis, I think it's always more relieving to know WHAT the diagnosis is than not knowing and worrying.

Blue231
by Bronze Member on Aug. 18, 2012 at 2:43 AM

If you think a certain behavior is a concern, be aware that it is not just the behavoir itself that is a concern. How severe the behavior is, as well as, how often the behavior occurs are important factors to consider. Also be aware of how easy or hard it is to redirect your child away from a behavior. You may see your child do something you heard a child with Autism has done, but may not be comparing the whole picture of that child with yours.

 

lfig720
by on Aug. 18, 2012 at 6:40 AM

Thank-you very much for all the input everyone, it is much appreciated.  Thank-you Blue, you are definitely correct about that, I had not thought about that part.

momtoscott
by on Aug. 18, 2012 at 7:08 AM

 There's a lot of things it could be, including speech starting a little slowly, but autism would be one of the possibilities.  The Early Intervention evaluation is a great place to start.  If there are still concerns later, then certainly a developmental pediatrician should take a look. 

There is still a stigma associated with developmental delay/autism issues, and because of this, people often try hard to assume there's nothing really wrong with their child, or the child of one of their relatives.  But--if he had a high fever and seemed sick you'd take him to the doctor (if the Tylenol wasn't helping, etc.), and your relatives and friends wouldn't give you grief about it.  Unfortunately, many people aren't anywhere near as kind or understanding about parents getting their kids evaluated for autism. 

Go with your instincts.  If you feel that something might be going on, get your son checked out.  Then you will have some peace of mind about the situation, whatever it turns out to be. 

Blue231
by Bronze Member on Aug. 18, 2012 at 10:00 AM
I hope everything works out for you guys and that your son gets great speech therapy if he needs it. Good luck!

Quoting lfig720:

Thank-you very much for all the input everyone, it is much appreciated.  Thank-you Blue, you are definitely correct about that, I had not thought about that part.



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cljohnson511
by on Aug. 18, 2012 at 11:04 AM
That sounds a lot like my son who has aspergers. I knew there was something very "different" about him, but everyone else seemed to brush it off, ie teachers, his doctor, family members. When he was small like yours, he practically lived in his cartoons. (blues clues more specifically). It was harmless so I didn't worry too much. But now he's 10 and struggles in social situations. Hes really awkward but refuses to talk to a therapist. We are trying to work with him the best we can. Good luck with yours. Sounds like you're heading in the right direction.
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kajira
by Emma on Aug. 18, 2012 at 1:00 PM

My son is autistic, and is very cuddling and clingy and liked to kiss. We had the opposite problem, lack of boundaries. He'd tell total strangers he liked to be tickled and ask if they wanted to tickle him.

(When he gets sensory overloaded, he likes to be tickled as a way to reduce the sensations of the other stuff, it took me forever to figure out why he only said it in public situations.)

But some of the key things about my osn's behavior around 2, had more to do with meltdowns and unredirecatable behaviors. He just helped himself to whatever he wanted, and didn't think to ask. He would wander with out caring if he was safe, or if a caregiver was trying to get his atention or redirect him.

If he got tired of walking, he'd do what we called noodle legging and lay down and refuse to move... we'd have to carry him whenever we want to go.

There's all sorts of things, looking back, I could pin point specifically that makes him classic autism - but he on the surface appeared so normal, engaging, social and happy despite a lot of the quirks/behaviors, it was put off, with a "he'll out grow it" mentality from *everyone* - doctors, teachers, family, etc.

He didn't, and at 8 1/2 while he's still a happy kid, he's still the kid who noodle legs and didn't really progress much past a toddler mentality in a lot of ways.

He's really bright in some ways... and he's a good kid.... but he got over looked - and I did too as a kid. I just came off as shy,and I'm more autistic than my son is, and in more of the "anti-social" variety.

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