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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Frustrated Step-Mom

Posted by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 11:42 AM
  • 5 Replies

Hello,

I am a step mom of a 13 year old Autistic girl. She is non-verbal, has temper tantrums and can become very agressive if she doesn't get what she wants or if she is told NO. She was adopted from the Ukraine at 10 months old by my husband and his previous wife. My husband has never been able to have kids of his own so this causes him to be very protectiveof her and nothing I do for her is right or good enough.   So I've had to step back and let him be in total control.  I have two boys of my own, one 19 years old and one 14 years old. Not saying that I've been a perfect parent and my kids are perfect, just meaning I do have a little bit of experience in parenting. Because I am not allowed to contribute to her care when she is in our home is very frustrating for me. Not only does this alienate me from them when she is there, because she requires 100% attention at all times, but it is very frustrating for me to sit back and watch the mistakes he consistantly makes by giving in to her and allowing her to win in every situation. Im not sure if I'm looking for help ....  maybe just a place to vent and see if there is someone else out there that is in the same situation as I and can relate. 

by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 11:42 AM
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Replies (1-5):
Bluerose1482
by Bronze Member on Jan. 23, 2013 at 1:39 PM
Sorry it is so stressful for you. Perhaps you could plan an action filled weekend out of the house while she's visiting. Shop, have dinner and a movie with a girl friend, have a mommy/son day with your 14 year old, etc. She'll have her dad to herself and you can spend time doing other things. Good luck!
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MomOfOneCoolKid
by Gold Member on Jan. 23, 2013 at 1:51 PM

Can she have a BCBA consult? Maybe if an expert came in and gave her opinion (i'd think you'd be surprised at how much the BCBA will agree with you) you guys could discuss what her opinion is and agree from there.

 

It must be a terribly hard situation. I hope it gets better.

sportsmom2011
by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 2:26 PM

Thank you both for responding!. Question: What is a BCBA Consult?  I've never heard of this. Would like to get more info. thanks!

MomOfOneCoolKid
by Gold Member on Jan. 23, 2013 at 2:45 PM

 


Quoting sportsmom2011:

Thank you both for responding!. Question: What is a BCBA Consult?  I've never heard of this. Would like to get more info. thanks!


Board Certified Behavior Analyst

http://www.behavior-consultant.com/whatisbcba.htm

 

sportsmom2011
by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 2:51 PM

Thanks!

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