Andrew my son is a three year old and has totally changed over the course of the last 18 months and no matter how I control the situation it's as I can't get it through to him etc or make him understand. I have a doctors appointment for him this evening 4:50pm but I wanted to know what you thought, basically I am going crazy, wondering.
Andrew is 3 years, 5 months old and this is a list of things he does:
* Used to be able to get himself dressed and now he can't do it, keeps sighing and taking tantrums when he can't do it.
* Crys at the drop of a hat if he sees someone else with something he wants.
* Constantly fidgets: hands, feet, willy, face etc
* Never sits still
* Talks to himself and has full blown conversations
* Gets up over night and starts singing/crying loudly and wakes other siblings up (4 and 15 months) and when you ask him why he gets up, he looks at you blankly and doesn't give you an answer or starts to cry or comes out with "I don't know".
* Has started to lie alot: Comes home with bruises from nursery/falls over outside when playing or walking and then blames it on either mam, dad, sister or teachers, but rotates everytime you ask who done it. (which has lead to social services, coming out twice, and when they have asked him who's done it he always comes out with "I don't know")
* Doesn't understand simple instructions (no matter how clearly I present them):
- He never seems to pay attention when we are talking to him,
- He will never stay quiet (I know you can't expect a child to be quiet 110% of the time) when his father is driving, or when told to do such as when his mam and dad are talking, always interrrupting too.
- Such as hold mammy's hand across the road - pulls away and runs off into oncoming traffic or infront of a car pulling out. Or if he doesn't want to hold my hand will pull away and throw himself on the floor, which in turn hurts himself and blames me, dad, teacher etc.
* He's fully potty trained, however when he now has a poo he will jump down, get it everywhere and i mean everywhere, then pull his trousers up and then sit back down like nothing's wrong.
* He has no comprehension and doesn't understand the word why.
* He will wake up on a morning, screaming and singing, basically like what he does over night and jump on top of his big sister to wake her up, one day i caught him and asked what he was doing and he said it was his big sister who woke him up and then when I said why lie about it, all we get is "I don't know why"
the list could go on....
Well went to the doctor on 25th January 2013 and the doctor said he would put in a referral for a child paediatrician and an referral with CAHMS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services).
This past week I have been at a friends house and he has turned into a little troublemaker, that's what I will call it!
Amy, 21 and her daughter Charlotte, 3. Which is good as the kids get to play with one another and mingle and we get some adult conversation!....
Well yesterday I was ashamed and in two minds on whether to go back round today or not, but in saying that not sure if she wants me to come back or not!. Andrew totally showed me up yesterday, and even Amy was shocked because Monday and Tuesday he was good as gold.
It was as if something, a switch even had been turned on in his head.
* He knocked over a glass vase filled with fake flowers and those glass pebble things all over the living room floor.
* Attacked Amy's Daughter: Pushed her over a few times, Pushed passed her, Smacked her with her "Dress Up" Necklace.
* Turned Amy's Stereo up to full blast (As we were in the kitchen and the stereo in the living room) we were making a cuppa and sorting Jayden out for his mid morning nap and then Amy ran in to turn it down followed by me and Andrew quickly jumped on the settee, looked down at the floor and pointed to Charlotte and blamed her.
* I had made a packed lunch for the kids for going to Amy's house: Sandwiches, Crisps and Pop. Andrew then was throwing his lunch to the dog, and I caught him in the act and when I asked why he said "I don't Know" so I put him in time out.
- Bare in mind Amy has two dogs, one dog in a cage: greyhound, and a big mongrel: that has free roam of the house.
When he was in time out he kept bum shuffling towards the greyhound in the cage and tormenting the dog, which in return made the dog, scratch him.
* Jayden was playing with a closed Fruit Shoot (Imogen's) and happily playing with it and Andrew grabbed Jayden, snatched the Fruit Shoot and then pushed him over which made him cry and then I picked him up and put him in Time Out on the bottom stairs.
I asked him why he did that to Jayden by getting down to his level and talking calmly and all I get is "I don't know" so I told him to sit still, be quiet and sit there for 3 mins, now where her living room door is (it faces the stairs) I hadn't even sat down on the settee and he's bum shuffling up and down and talking to himself along with fidgeting. So I told him to sit still and be quiet.
In the end even Amy had a word with him and asked him to be good and he didn't listen because five minutes later he started all over again.
Then on the way home me and Imogen were chatting and having a bit of a giggle (Imogen kept saying mammy don't get upset otherwise I'd tickle you all the way home) Andrew then started kicking me and demanding I hold his hand. So I held his hand but kept a tight grip as he kept trying to pull away. Then demanded I let him go, so I did and kept walking and then he kept demanding I held his hand again. So I said no, all I wanted to do was get home and have a cuppa and be in my own space so I could calm down.
Gets home, I also put the pram in the house first, then Imogen follows and then Andrew. Well I have two steps into my house, so you can picture me trying to lift the pram into the house, Andrew pushes Imogen out the way and pushes the pram and trys to push pass it to get into the house so I picked him up and placed him back of the line and told him to wait, once I got in, Imogen then came in and then she didn't even get in the house and he pushed the front door (her foot got stuck under the door and has cut her foot open all because Andrew is so impatient.)
So I sent him to his room, while I could sort out the other two, clean imogen up and put a plaster on etc, change jaydens bum and give him his next bottle etc all the while Andrew is kicking the shit outta things in his and Jayden's room!
Once I sorted out Imogen and Andrew I asked him calmly why he has been so naughty today and all I got was "Because" so I said no why you been naughty and hurt people and he's saying " I don't Know" so I told him until you can work out why you can stay in here, obviously he kicked off by lashing out at me, IAlan got home 15 mins later seen me in a mess and Imogen told him everything Andrew down today, so we both went up to calmly talk to him and he said the same to both of us "because"
So I sent him to bed without his tea!
What to do?