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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

New to this group with autistic son

Posted by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 6:55 AM
  • 15 Replies
2 moms liked this

Hi everyone, my name is Julie.  I have an autistic son that will soon be 9 yrs. old.  He seems to be getting worse.  His doctor says that around this age to early teen are the hardest for autistic kids.  Is this really true??  I also have a daughter that's about 5 years older than him and happily married.  Things just seem so rough right now.  Our family lives on the other side of the country and I don't have many friends here.  I'm a stay at home mom with some health issues.  My son goes to a public school in a class with children with special needs.  If you would like to know more about me just check out my profile.

Thank you,

Julie

by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 6:55 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mypbandj
by Jen on Mar. 5, 2013 at 7:54 AM
Wait, your 14 year old is happily married? Did I read that right??

Welcome to the group. I think that the tween/teen years can be hard for any kid. They become like toddlers again. LOL
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she-ra2000
by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 8:06 AM

I hope it's not cause my son will be 9 next year :(

mombritjosh
by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 8:07 AM
1 mom liked this

Soooooo sorry!  I am happily married for 16 years.  My son is getting worse than when he was a toddler!!!  Things have been rough. My daughter who will be 14 soon is great and very single!!!!  Doesn't even have a boyfriend.  

Thanks for pointing all that out....LOL

dawncs
by Dawn on Mar. 5, 2013 at 8:55 AM

Welcome to the group! Puberty is one of the hardest times for disabled kids. I have heard and know of it from my own personal experience. Depending on their understanding, it can make it very interesting talkign about the changes in their body to their understanding level. Unfortunately, there are very few books written to the maturity level for some of our kids.

JTMOM422
by Brenda on Mar. 5, 2013 at 9:27 AM

I have heard that during that time hormones play into things. Hormones are hard enough on a child that is NT I can imagine that it would be alot harder on a child with ASD. My ds is almost 3 and I am dreading those years. Welcome to the group.

MomOfOneCoolKid
by Gold Member on Mar. 6, 2013 at 2:48 PM

 


Quoting mombritjosh:

Soooooo sorry!  I am happily married for 16 years.  My son is getting worse than when he was a toddler!!!  Things have been rough. My daughter who will be 14 soon is great and very single!!!!  Doesn't even have a boyfriend.  

Thanks for pointing all that out....LOL


 laughingI read it the same way. 9 + 5 = 14 LOL

kajira
by Emma on Mar. 6, 2013 at 2:57 PM
1 mom liked this

Hey there, my son's almost 9 too! And yes, he got worse over the last year.

However, he has more than just autism going on - and he hasn't even started puberty yet.

As an autistic adult, I think 10-12 was pretty hard on me, but 18-21 was way better and at 27 this year, I've been happily married for 7 years and am a fully functional adult with 2 kids and a wonderful spouse.

Hormones are a pain and the social structures that happen around that age as kids mature is a pain in the butt socially - especially because autistic kids tend to mature a little slower.... so they are slightly behind mentally/emotionally, but physically about the same... so it can cause problems.

Just think of him as not being 9... think of him as being like 5-6 years old emotionally.

takeitall13
by Bronze Member on Mar. 6, 2013 at 3:07 PM

 I thought you meant that YOU were happily married and NOT your daughter :D  Our son is only a toddler so we're not there yet but if hes harder than TODDLER years I feel for you and hope things will get better soon.. is he working with therapists?  :/  So hard, do you know any specific things that help calm him down?  I know reading and flashcards work for my son.. oh and tires and rocks.  HUGS

Quoting mombritjosh:

Soooooo sorry!  I am happily married for 16 years.  My son is getting worse than when he was a toddler!!!  Things have been rough. My daughter who will be 14 soon is great and very single!!!!  Doesn't even have a boyfriend.  

Thanks for pointing all that out....LOL

 

mombritjosh
by on Mar. 6, 2013 at 4:59 PM

Thank you, thank you, thank you........With what I read from you I shed a few tears.  I no longer feel alone through all this.  My son has his autism and also ADHD, and OCD.  My son hasn't started puberty either but I guess "from what his doc. says" that things start changing in the body chemically before we even start seeing them thus the changes and harder time with all the disabilites.  I was told around the teen years things will start smoothing out for him.  I am so very happy to hear you are a fully functioning adult and thrilled about you having 2 kids and a wonderful spouse.  I've often wondered what my son might have in store for him with his future.

Oh, BTW...you are right, my son is acting like a 5 year old now emotionally.    I have strong faith and always think glass 1/2 full, but lately it has been harder with him.  I love him so and when he is doing good he is so warm hearted, caring, and very loving.  Yesterday he started and stopped a couple medicines.  I pray they help.

I hope you don't mind if we can stay in touch.  I finally feel at ease knowing I am not alone with all this with my son.  If you don't mind I would love to be your friend on here.  Just let me know please. 

Again, thank you so very much!!!

you rock


Quoting kajira:

Hey there, my son's almost 9 too! And yes, he got worse over the last year.

However, he has more than just autism going on - and he hasn't even started puberty yet.

As an autistic adult, I think 10-12 was pretty hard on me, but 18-21 was way better and at 27 this year, I've been happily married for 7 years and am a fully functional adult with 2 kids and a wonderful spouse.

Hormones are a pain and the social structures that happen around that age as kids mature is a pain in the butt socially - especially because autistic kids tend to mature a little slower.... so they are slightly behind mentally/emotionally, but physically about the same... so it can cause problems.

Just think of him as not being 9... think of him as being like 5-6 years old emotionally.


kajira
by Emma on Mar. 6, 2013 at 5:07 PM

Sure, I'd be honored to stay in touch. I also have yahoo messenger if you'd like to ever chat there.


Quoting mombritjosh:

Thank you, thank you, thank you........With what I read from you I shed a few tears.  I no longer feel alone through all this.  My son has his autism and also ADHD, and OCD.  My son hasn't started puberty either but I guess "from what his doc. says" that things start changing in the body chemically before we even start seeing them thus the changes and harder time with all the disabilites.  I was told around the teen years things will start smoothing out for him.  I am so very happy to hear you are a fully functioning adult and thrilled about you having 2 kids and a wonderful spouse.  I've often wondered what my son might have in store for him with his future.

Oh, BTW...you are right, my son is acting like a 5 year old now emotionally.    I have strong faith and always think glass 1/2 full, but lately it has been harder with him.  I love him so and when he is doing good he is so warm hearted, caring, and very loving.  Yesterday he started and stopped a couple medicines.  I pray they help.

I hope you don't mind if we can stay in touch.  I finally feel at ease knowing I am not alone with all this with my son.  If you don't mind I would love to be your friend on here.  Just let me know please. 

Again, thank you so very much!!!

you rock


Quoting kajira:

Hey there, my son's almost 9 too! And yes, he got worse over the last year.

However, he has more than just autism going on - and he hasn't even started puberty yet.

As an autistic adult, I think 10-12 was pretty hard on me, but 18-21 was way better and at 27 this year, I've been happily married for 7 years and am a fully functional adult with 2 kids and a wonderful spouse.

Hormones are a pain and the social structures that happen around that age as kids mature is a pain in the butt socially - especially because autistic kids tend to mature a little slower.... so they are slightly behind mentally/emotionally, but physically about the same... so it can cause problems.

Just think of him as not being 9... think of him as being like 5-6 years old emotionally.



Living with Autism - The quirky kitty.

Our autistic Family - A Dad's point of view on living with Autism

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