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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

beating myself up....

Posted by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:21 AM
  • 17 Replies

I'm a single mom with an spergers 9 year old boy who I'm crazy for but I admit he is a handful and I often look forward to him going to his dad's for a weekend. The problem is as soon as he leaves I crash on the couch and spend the whole weekend feeling bad that I don't get enough done with my precious free time and I miss him so much. My apartment is way too quiet and every time I find a random lego piece on the floor it makes me cry. How do I enjoy this valuable time alone without feeling guilty? Is it OK that some times I am so tired that I do a few loads of laundry and then just lay around? I go into such a funk while he is gone and end up feeling like I wasted time that could be so valuable....then I beat myself up.

by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:21 AM
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Replies (1-10):
VioletsMomTown
by Robyn on Mar. 24, 2013 at 10:28 AM
1 mom liked this

Oh geez, don't worry about it! You need to recharge your batteries, that's ok. Some of my favorite weekends are the ones where I stay in my pajamas and watch movies, nothing wrong with that! coffee

busymommy98
by Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 1:22 PM
1 mom liked this

Oh mama, don't beat yourself up. Those of us with kids like ours need the downtime. I have had to learn the hard way that if I don't take time for myself, I am NO good to myself or anyone else. Let it go. Whatever doesn't absolutely have to be done for the welfare of you and ds can wait a day. Recharge first or you will burn out. I have to confess that I struggle with this daily. I am my own worst enemy. Rest momma and take the rest in stride. We are all there with ya...

darbyakeep45
by Darby on Mar. 24, 2013 at 1:23 PM
1 mom liked this

Hugs mama!  Robyn is right...you need to recharge your batteries and get some rest during those weekends!  Big hugs!

TheJerseyGirl
by Michele on Mar. 24, 2013 at 1:32 PM
1 mom liked this
Mama, please don't feel guilty.. I do the same thing Monday mornings! You may even find me doing a cartwheel or two in the livingroom... Lol!
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lucasmadre
by Kari on Mar. 24, 2013 at 3:47 PM

Thanks ladies, I am so worn out lately that I just use all my free time catching up on rest and feeling guilty. Guess I will try to give up the feeling guilty part. You guys are the best, what would I do without you? XO

takeitall13
by Bronze Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 4:19 PM

 this!  :)  HUGS 

Quoting VioletsMomTown:

Oh geez, don't worry about it! You need to recharge your batteries, that's ok. Some of my favorite weekends are the ones where I stay in my pajamas and watch movies, nothing wrong with that! coffee

 

Charizma77
by Carissa on Mar. 24, 2013 at 8:53 PM


Haha! Me too..minus the cartwheel ;)

Quoting TheJerseyGirl:

Mama, please don't feel guilty.. I do the same thing Monday mornings! You may even find me doing a cartwheel or two in the livingroom... Lol!



Bluerose1482
by Bronze Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 9:09 PM

You need to rest when you can so you can give 110% when he's home.  It is ok to enjoy some time by yourself.

yourdoingwhat
by Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 9:34 PM
2 moms liked this

HEY full time mom, LAY DOWN AND VEG OUT HONEY!!!! If you and your child have at least 1 pair of clean socks and undies, do what you need to do-veg out! cuz the wash and dishes and cobwebs will be there til you get to them! You need to regroup to be the mom you need to be when he comes home. Does he care that the dishes aren't done? Do he say, hey mom why didn't you do the wash while I was gone? My guess is NO! He probably comes in and realizes how much he missed you and how much you missed him. While he's gone and you miss him, just remembr that you need this time to regroup and rebuild that energy that you and he are going to need. If you think you not doing anything while he's gone is bad, know that my one stairway is ALWAYS ready for halloween! Cobwebs year round lol. Now go sit down and watch some cheesy reality show, where they have no idea what reality really is!

lucasmadre
by Kari on Mar. 24, 2013 at 9:49 PM

Seriously, thanks you guys! I want to be able to feel like I deserve a little time off for good behavior and I am a better mom when I am rested so as usual...you guys are right!!!  

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